Side Story - I [ BONUS+++CHAPTER ]

You can see a guy so hideous that he looks like a young avocado is having sex with an old avocado.

The man is sitting on a luxury yacht full of whores and an overwhelming amount of chimichangas while he sips a mojito.

"Hello, you know that the beautiful author promised that he would create about one of the most loved and loved characters in the Marvel universe, as you know, richi, I can tell you the truth, author sama."- He said it staring into space and the whores looked at him strangely.

Whore : "tell me why we are on a yacht with this madman."- She whispered to her friend.

Whore 1 : "because an unknown man came and paid us a large sum of money just to please this madman."- She said it she would be.

"leaving the conversations of those extras that will be done in this special chapter that seems like a Marvel zombies."- Wade said it with emotion.

In that moment a leaf falls out of nowhere in his face he reads it to stare into the void angry.

"don't screw up my chapter like you don't want a Marvel zombie well then it'll be me deadpool murderer of the Marvel universe."- he said it with a smile.

A stone falls on him at high speed, ripping his head off.

Whore : "ohhh goooood he's dead."- Scream full of fear.

"I'm not dead."- It was said by a head that was beginning to come out of his body the women were frightened he stopped to pick up the rock that he has something written to start reading.

He just looks at the sea with an angry look.

"you're kidding me author huh..you can't do this to me deadpool can kill the entire Marvel universe or you want to make deadpool fucks the entire Marvel universe wait it wouldn't be bad."- He said it while a smile began to grow.

Then after few moments drops a larger rock on his which tears off his bottom.

While he recovers, baby legs begin to grow so he can stand up.

"Stop fucking around, maybe I can't die, son of a bitch, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt me."

"You know I think I'm going to go into the wilderness to kill some cannibals and taste the alamantuin katana you gave me."- He said it upset.

The girls were scared looking at him hoping that something else would not happen.

"But first we return to the mainland."- He said tired seeing the fearful looks.

Back on land, the women are seen running terrified by the things they saw, something they can never forget.

'Not that it was that much."- He said it with an annoyed snort as he is surrounded.

Agent : "Stay here, we're taking you to S.H.I.E.L.D for causing public disorder."

"Since when is S.H.I.E.L.D police?" I ask curious.

Agent : "that shouldn't matter to you"

mind : don't be an idiot wade they love you and it shows that you are very beautiful and Maria Hill wants to take you to bed to have sex with her.

mind 2: go with them and demand a bunch of chimichangas

Wade :' mind 2 is right but I better ask.'- He thought seriously.

Wade : "First do you guys you have chimichangas."- He said it most seriously.

"No why you ask?"

"I already followed my answer, see you."- He said it to hit the officer and run while the other officers tried to get in the way only for him to take them down with ease.

A tall, heavily muscled guy stepped in front of him to get in the way only for Wade to stop and look at him seriously.

"move or you will suffer the consequences."- He said it in his masculine voice that he could intimidate even the hulk himself.

(author: why do I have to write this shit)

(wade: because you promised me a special chapter and you know I won't stop fucking with you until you make me mc of my World even if I went to the other dimension. He said it with a sitting on a black leather sofa)

(author: you will see that some of the fics will kill you so that you cannot appear, it is an oath of creator)

(wade: you can say what you want, but you know that you will never find a way to destroy me if even you fuck me to death you will not be able to do anything to me)

(wade: continue my epic shield fight)

Agent: "you're very funny dwarf I don't think yo…. "- He didn't finish his sentence as he fell to the ground motionless thanks to a direct kick to his balls that rendered him useless.

'this is better deadpool exterminate S.H.I.E.L.D.'- Wade thought about it with a smile.

Mind: "this will be incredible we can have Maria Hill as a slave."

Mind 2: "I agree with my stupidest side."

Wade: "this is going to be awesome just wait maria hill i'll put you in a hot bunny outfit." He yell it out loud in an amused tone.

The agents who heard that turned pale imagining her covered in blood and visors with her two pistols.

'That guy is insane.'- They all thought at the same time.

While on the helicarrier you could see a Maria Hill frustrated at having lost Richard.

Maria: 'They managed to locate wade."- She ask annoyed.

As she looked at a screen where the agents are looking at her nervously.

Agent: "Yes ma'am, but the escapee seems to be asking about some chimichangas."

Maria: "I gave them a lot of chimichangas what they made with it." She said it she upset.

Agent: "We thought it was for us and we ate it."

María: "You'll are useless, it seems that I will have to go personally to hunt him down."- She said it upset.

"he is one of the most dangerous and uncontrollable mutants that there is, he is not allied with anyone and it is possible that with some things we can have him on our side."- She said it would be the agent just nodded.

She walked out of her current office that was previously her boss's.

To enter a cubicle where she entered a password and verified the retina of her eyes, so that a door opens that takes her to her own armory, she prepared the weapons to take an assault rifle that has expanding bullets, something that could possibly to give time to capture the mutant, some pistols that are loaded with tranquilizer bullets, some grenades with sleeping gas, he put on a tight suit that highlights his body that is made of a keblar alloy with vibraniun with the S.H.I.E.L.D logo on his back .

Maria: 'I'm ready.' She thought she would be as she walks towards the exit of the personal armory.

'maybe that mutant has escaped but you wade will not escape you have no planet or dimension to go.'- She thought she would be.

Maria: " where was the last time you saw deadpool."- She ask seriously.

Agent: "ma'am was seen an hour ago running towards charles xavier's school for super gifted people."

"it seems that everything happens with them I will go alone I want a rapid response team when I call for reinforcements."- Maria said it she would be.

Agent: "Got it boss."

while with deadpool

Wade : "There's nothing better than some nice hot dogs while you're walking to see an old friend."- He said so as he lifted his costume mask to bite into his hot dog.

He saw Xavier's mansion in the distance and was impressed, but not by the mansion but by the number of reporters who are at the door.

"don't expect this type of reception, but don't worry, deadpool arrived."- He said it putting on a heroic pose.

The reporters looked at him for a moment to ignore him and return to Scott who looks tired and in a very bad mood.

Scott: "You don't know how much I hate you fucking son of a bitch you are leaving, but you're leaving us with this annoyance." He said it in an annoyed whisper. ( ofcourse he's saying this to Richard )

Jean: "honey you shouldn't be upset with heroics these people are interested in mutants in a favorable way for us." She said it telepathically.

He looked at her annoyed and scowled.

'Sure we've saved thousands of lives, but he goes out and stops some villains and gets famous.' He thought it annoying.

Jean: "I know that's got you upset but he fought the Juggernaut and managed to win more than beat Magneto and the part of the city that was destroyed by the fighting he restored making it look like a flawless heroic job."- She said it calmly.

Scott: 'But all of our effort is just being sidelined with just one appearance.'- he thought it annoying.

Journalist: "Where is this berserk, we want to know why you focused so much on saving the innocent."

Journalist 1: "Yes, why a mutant who is despised by most of the American population would save one who despises him."

???: "That's simple, he told me once."- It was said by a calm voice that came behind them to see Dr. Charles Xavier.

Journalist: "What would that be?"- She ask interested.

Xavier: "before I had my powers and even though I have them I'm still human that won't change for anything."

Reporter: "could you tell us the whereabouts of where berserk is."

Xavier: "He doesn't belong to this dimension so he went back to his dimension, one where mutants live with people as equals." Some reporters only looked at that comment with derision.

Reporter: "It means that the world is in ruins for there to be equality."- He said it in a mocking tone.

Xavier: "soon you will know." He said it with a soft smile.

Xavier: "colossus you could bring a big screen." He commented telepathically.

Colossus: "Understood Professor I will be there immediately."-;He said it in a hurry.

The professor takes out a USB with a smile on that colossus arrives making the journalist look at him with fear, but he lowers a special television near the professor.

The teacher connects the USB to the screen to show files where there is a reporter where she highlights as a historical event the journalists were amazed.

While they were having fun, Wade is seen getting into the arms of Colossus.

Wade: "how are you honey." He said it by running his hand across his chest.

Colossus: "wade I don't expect to see you here mostly you call me to say that the X-men go to hell and to come and drink Logan's beers that he is already furious and I comment that he would be in the Amazon to kill a plague."

Wade: "you know how wolvi is always very spiteful, but I'm not here to have fun, I'm here for something very important." He said it seriously.

Colossus: "and that would be."

Wade: "a sexy secret agent wants to rape me would you protect me big man."- Colossus drops it.

Wade: "Hey that's rude."

Colossus: "wade you got yourself into again."- He said it upset.

Wade: "in no time I was on my yacht with my chimichangas and whores when it made me want to return to land to buy more chimichangas when some agents tried to kidnap me and since you know I wouldn't harm anyone I ran terrified into your big arms."- He said it feigning sadness as he wiped his tears with a handkerchief that has the appearance of sexy panties.

While with Xavier.

Journalist: "That's amazing how he faced a monster before he had his powers."- She said it watching those videos.

Xavier: "he sought to do good because in his world it is normal for a mutant who has the ability to fight to protect others and he, even without being a mutant at that time, sought to protect the innocent, that which makes them think."- He said it seriously.

Reporter: "that he is just suicidal." She said it seriously.

Xavier: "It doesn't matter if the person has powers or not, if you can protect people, even if it means getting hurt, you will do it because at that moment there is no mutant or human, there are only innocent people."

Xavier: "if you want to know more about him I will be happy to answer." He said calm.

María: "If his world is full of peace, why would one of us hunt them down?"- She said so stepping out of the crowd with her machine gun positioned so she could fire fast.

Xavier: "It was because of a mistake that happened in his world that he was sent to ours."- He said it in his typical calm tone.

Maria: "Leaving all that peace and love shit hand over me wade."- She said it serious.

Xavier: "Miss Hill, we don't have Mr. Wade, and if we did have him, we'd like to know why you want him."

María: "something that is not of your interest Professor Xavier."- she said it in her curt tone.

Maria: "just hand him over.*- She said it serious.

Xavier: "I'm sorry Miss Hill, but I don't know what I could do with Mr. Wade since we have had many bad experiences with the government, we are not very trustworthy with you."- He said it seriously.

She just snorted with an annoyed look.

María: "there are already two of us because I never trust monsters that have no limits."- She said it she upset.

Xavier: "Miss Hill, I would like you to leave here."- he said it in an annoyed tone.

In that wade came out to fall into the arms of Maria Hill.

Wade: "hello love how are you." He said it in a playful tone.

Maria: "well I already have it see you." She said it quietly and started to get along.

In that came colossus.

Colossus: "you have to avoid taking it." He said it worried.

Xavier: "Piotr I know you like Wade but he made his decision to leave."

Colossus: "It's not that wade thinks to destroy the helicarrier and do something stupid." He said it with fear.

Scott: "We have to stop this madman before he turns us into the enemy again." He said it upset.

Xavier: "Let's not let them control it."

After an hour we see deadpool.

Wade is chained without his weapons, but with his suit because every time an agent took off his mask they ran to vomit when they saw his face.

Wade: "You are a shitty writer for insulting my natural beauty."- He said it offended.

While our beloved and deformed mercenary goes to the office of Maria Hill.

Maria: "I'll take off your handcuffs so you can listen to me and give me your answer."- She said it in a serious tone.

He just nodded in understanding while his belt full of explosives had them ready just to pull a trigger.

Maria: "I want you to work as an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D."

Wade: "It's a joke, I really thought it would be, I don't know how I want you to be my personal bitch or my handsome mercenary, I want a date with you."

Maria: "well if you don't accept it is the option that you be our test subject with all our prototype weapons."- Shw said it in a calm tone.

Wade:" wait I'm not refusing just tell me what are the benefits you give me for being an agent."

María: "You will have the chimichangas you want, a better suit that will withstand the high temperatures and some exclusive scientists who will seek to return you to your old appearance, but without losing your powers, what do you think?"

Wade: "You know you already had me when you said all the chimichangas I can eat, but it wouldn't hurt to be handsome again." He said it with a smile that was hidden by his mask.

Maria: "I'll take that as if you start when we call you."- She said it he would take out a special phone.

Wade: "This is amazing and here I was thinking of blowing up the entire helicarrier in case I got bored." He said it with a smile.

Maria: "You thought to blow all of us to pieces."- She said it incredulously.

María: "If you do it, you're a damn insane person, but going back to the subject, I also want you to create a group of mutants that will be under your command, codenamed X-forts."

Wade: "aaaaaa~" (Schoolgirl scream.)

Wade: "~I'll tell colossus he'll be jealous~"

Without further ado he left the office to pull out a red and black phone with his symbol on it.

**In the call.**

Wade: "Guess the big guy."

Colossus: "we are more hated because you destroyed the helicarrier."

Wade: "I'm an official SHIELD agent and I can create my own team."

Colossus: "that's good my friend congratulations."

**End of call.**

Wade: "This is not what I asked for but I'll settle for now but I still want my Marvel zombie."

Up to this point.

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A/N : A fun Chapter 😂 oneshot

what do you guys think...

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