Chapter 23

*torture and abuse mentioned as well as strong language*

So cold, it was so cold. I could hear my teeth chattering and my body quivering but there was absolutely nothing I could do about it.

I couldn't move my body, everything was numb. I didn't know what day it was or what hour I lost track of time.

I could hear keys rattling in the lock of my cell and I knew what they were here for, my daily beating and then after that the Wolfsbane and after that well they did what ever sadistic thing they wanted to do.

I fought, in the begging I fought every single second. I clawed and bit and snarled and thrashed but they were immune. They just found better even more painful ways to hurt me and they laughed as they did. They kept saying how my werewolf healing had comeback to "bite me in the arse" because now they could go on for months and torture me because I healed so fast. So they'd beat me and beat me until it took me three times the normal time for my body to heal and then they'd repeat the cycle again.

I tried so hard to be strong I would fight them in everything I'd fight when they dragged me out of my cell by my hair and I'd bite what ever piece of meat I could see that was reaching for me but they soon put a muzzle over my mouth and said I now look the part of a proper dog.

They kept saying I was so weak, so fragile and unwanted and pathetic and all alone in life and I couldn't help but start to believe them. I was weak I could barely move and I can't fight even after I promised myself I would, I can't, isn't that weak. No one would ever want me now, I was ruined, tainted. I bet everyone had forgotten about me no one cares, no one came to look for me, I was all alone just like they said.

I would tell myself that I had my wolf but I haven't felt her in ages. It feels as if she isn't even there. In the beginning all I felt was her agony and pain and it would cripple me so maybe I should be grateful I can't feel her but maybe she's dead I don't even know at this stage.

The guards strode into my cell with their Wolfsbane guns aimed at me. I just looked at them as I lay huddled on the concrete floor.

' Get up you worthless dog!' The one yelled and kicked me in my ribs. I gasped out loud and sneered at him.

' The pathetic thing can't even stand Josh! My god it fucking stinks in here, such a filthy animal she sleeps in her own shit and piss.' His companion said scrunching up his face in disgust.

I huddled closer into myself feeling so pathetic. There wasn't anywhere to relieve myself but a bucket in the corner which I used but then I couldn't even move so it was hard, everything was hard.

I barely went to the toilet anymore anyway because there was nothing to relieve. They didn't feed me, I only got a piece of mouldy bread every six day and at night when I'd be sleeping they'd walk in and throw ice cold water over me and that was what I had to drink.

The guards each took a hold of one of my arms and dragged me out of my cell. They continued to call me names and complain about my stench but I just get quiet the muzzle over my mouth preventing me from snapping at them with my teeth.

I didn't know where I was going because I couldn't see anything. Every time they came to take me I would go temporarily blind. At first I was beyond confused and freaked out until I realised it was one of their spells.

I tried to make out my surrounding but it was difficult. I knew after I was taken out of my cell that we would go up about ten stairs and then I would always smell a sort of sulphur and hear people walking around. The space would feel big and I knew we would come out into nature not a building, which meant my cell was not connected to a upstairs building but perhaps a cellar of sorts outside.

We would walk a bit further and then I would hear doors open and I would be lead down a corridor and every day I'd hear screams and knew I wasn't the only prisoner.

Then I'd be thrown into a room which would always be dark but not filthy. Cadmer would always be there sometimes to observe the torture or partake himself always smiling always calling me "Kitten" and I'd grit my teeth until they hurt.

I was throw into said room and I fell onto the floor. My vision came back to me in a flash and I blinked trying to adjust to being able to see again.

' Why Kitten don't you look so ravishing today.' Cadmer said sarcastically as he sat on a chair in the middle of the room which was bare apart from his chair and a table with torture instruments on it.

I shuddered at the sight of him. He disgusted me beyond reason. Every time I looked at him I imagined his death at my hands. He always wore a glove over the hand with the finger tip I had bitten off.

He got up from his chair and walked towards my form on the floor. I refused to acknowledge him even when he knelt besides me and was right in front of my face.

He took a hold of my muzzle and forced my face up to his smiling face.

' I have three gifts for you today little Kitten.' He said holding up three fingers.

He clapped his hands and an extremely muscled man walked in. His scarred face was expressionless, he looked like he could be an executioner. Maybe Cadmers finally going to kill me and some part of me begged for that to be true, the pain would finally be over and I'd be free. But the other part, the fighting part refused to die at the hands of this sadist and give him the satisfaction.

The man stood motionless behind Cadmer who got up and walked to the table with the torture instruments.

He walked along it and finally stopped in front of one which he then proceeded to pick up. I couldn't quite make it out it was so dark in here. They probably cast a spell which made them see better in the dark because I was struggling with my almost human eyes. I say almost human eyes because in my weakened state and my absent wolf I've lost a lot of my werewolf advantages.

Cadmer walked closer and I noticed he held a whip in his hand. It dragged behind him as he walked. He passed it to the man and then sat back down in his chair.

' For your first gift Kitten, fifty lashes,' He said.