CH-65 Cafe fight[end]

"Don't you think she's got a bit too much sass, bro?" Brother Bao, a fellow whose weight could make sumo wrestlers jealous, gave Nian's shoulder a hefty pat.

He squinted at me like I owed him last month's protection money.

"Let me take care of this little lady." Bao announced, cracking his knuckles with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer meeting drywall.

"Oh Rhino, hold my beer and feel this." I muttered, rolling my eyes so hard they almost disappeared into the back of my skull.

The rotund man's meaty paw clamped down on my shoulder, I didn't hesitate. In one fluid motion, my right foot forward, turning my body perpendicular to his.

Simultaneously, I raised my left arm up and across my body, deftly trapping his extending right arm within my clutch, As my big nails dig into his flesh.

With his advance momentum already committed, I torqued my hips and shoulders, using his own force as his opponent.

Instantly, I spinned my back towards him, keeping my elbow tightly pinned to trap his arm on my shoulder.

I dipped my center of gravity low, assisting me to transition smoothly into an outer reaping throw. My right leg lashed out in a sweeping arc, clipping the backs of the man's knees.

Coupled with the rotational force from my hips and shoulders, it disrupted his base. The giant's feet came out from under him as his world turned upside down.

With a mighty heave, aided by inertia, I redirected his trajectory up and over my shoulder.

Two poor subordinates never saw it coming until a 200 pounds of Michelin man cannonballed straight fell into their gut.

Thud!

"OOMPH!"

"My spleen...!"

Folds of flesh compressed like an airbag deploying the pounds of inertia plastered them to the ground. Two incapacitated with a single fluid throw - not a bad day's work.

Everyone's Jaws literally hit the floor as registration set in - this scrappy cultivator just pulled off a feat that would make Bruce Lee respect.

See, guys at my level in the fusion realms, stage 1, are supposed to be able to deadlift small cars and benchpress small horses.

But taking down a full-grown elephant in the blink of an eye? That's like watching a flea kick a grizzly's butt. Totally beyond the realm of acceptability.

I could practically hear the thoughts racing through everyone's stunned minds: "Did I just see that? Is this even legal? Someone get the ref, because that had to be a foul or something!"

"You look like you read futa x female fanfics with a/b/o dynamics. Where your ugly 9th mum cried and shot cum straight into your father's ass." I Insulted Nian and brushed some imaginary dust from my sleeve as the groans of the fallen filled the air.

Nian looked like he was about to spontaneously combust, doing that adorable goldfish mouth gape thing.

"What in the fifteen fusion realms did you just do?" He squeaked, backpedaling the words.

I turned to the other flunkies, who were frozen stiffer than statues at an art museum.

"So, you guys are buddies with the big fella, right?" I asked oh-so-casually, crossing my arms under my perky bosoms.

Well, you'd have thought I just quizz them to streak through the Emperor's wedding ceremony. They instantly launched into frantic denial mode, waving their hands around like they were trying to fly away a swarm of angry scorpion wasps.

"No no no, we just met him today! He's no friend of ours but a one night stand slut!"

"Yeah, some skeezy stranger who tried to buy us for the night if you know what I mean..."

"Simple… he wanted to suck our sword for a night. Very dirty person. I feel sick from thoughts."

"Ugh, don't remind me - he wanted to make it rain if we treated him like a king of whores for the evening." They scampered off faster than roaches when you flip on the lights, leaving miserable Nian alone with yours truly.

He shot them the stink-eye before the realization hit - he was outnumbered and out-skilled in this weird showdown.

Puffing out his chest, Mr. Bravado tried to regain some sense of dignity. "This... this is outright assault! You're going down, mister - I'm calling the FBI as we speak!!"

"Your sumo wrestler was about to crush my shoulder. It was self defense as well." I just grinned. "... Oooh, I'm shaking in my iron-woven boots! You do that... right after I demonstrate my Flying Piledriver Jutsu!"

If it wasn't a classic case of 'wrong place, wrong time' for poor Nian.

The dude's face turned whiter than a fresh dumpling when he saw my action . He booked it out of there faster than a streaker at a police convention!

That's when the real party joined the show. It was none other than Disha herself, our Miss President of Zyricon group.

She entered the cafe like she purchased the place… which, now that I think about it, she probably did.

The manager's eyes just about bugged out of his skull when he spotted her. "W-Welcome, Miss President! What an unexpected pleasu-''

He stopped mid-sentence, suddenly noticing the groaning human pretzels scattered around the floor. His mouth hung open, doing a stellar impression of a gasping fish.

But did Disha acknowledge him? As if trash air!

She zeroed in on little old me with the heat-seeking accuracy of a fighter jet locking onto its target. Arle and Zeno sat there, unbothered, just casually noshing away like this was an everyday occurrence.

Before I could say 'Wow, what impeccable timing!' Disha rushed me up in a bear hug tighter than a Python after an all-you-can-eat buffet.

Now, I'm no stranger to friendly gestures, but this was getting a bit excessive even for me!

"Iris! It's been too long!" she gushed, damn nearly cracking a rib with those hands across around my shoulder.

"Yeah...no kidding…" I wheezed out breathless while giving her a few awkward pats on the back to signal "Okay, time to dismount, disha!"

She pulled away, and I inhaled down some sweet oxygen while Disha glared in on the poor sap manager. "What is going on in my cafe?"

The guy shrank back like he'd been slapped by a cold fish. "N-N-Nothing to concern yourself with, Miss President! I have it completely und-"

"Don't even THINK about finishing that sentence!" I cheerfully interjected with a smile slick enough to make an oil tycoon jealous.

"This cafe's been a regular den of harassment and injustice! Why, those brats laying on the floor were about to defile me and my daughter before your timely entry!"