What I Am

Like a raging fire, I stood staring up at Ellie with hatred in my eyes. Somebody I learned to trust over that month, spitting all over the things we've worked for. I could feel my arms tingle with that same hatred as I turned back towards the gate. They slowly started to move in… Ellie… she ruined it, and she got us killed.

"Put everybody in restraints! They'll watch their precious leader die… after he watches me destroy their base. Thanks, Ms. Danafall." Raven looked up at Ellie as she jumped down into the base, landing on the roof of my house. Dani, Ullr, Mandi, Carl, and even Red were all put under restraints.

"I HATE YOU! You knew that betrayal would work and how weak I was, yet you still did it! DAMN YOU!" I yelled out at Ellie, but she walked by me and slapped me, throwing me to the ground once more.

"Pitiful White Stone. It was so sad to manipulate you that whole time. The hopeful look in your eyes wasting away into a pure rage was so satisfying after all this time. That's just the way this world works, White Stone." That damn name… was all about my stone.

Raven picked up Ullr's sledgehammer and swung it into the side of one of our houses, causing it to tip over due to the lack of support.

"So easily dismembered. Your poor village wouldn't have lasted past this winter." He swung again, and it started to cave in on itself. "What about those animals over there? Those are precious to you, I'm sure."

Why was he doing this?! The houses… the innocent animals?! What the hell was wrong with this man?! Are these the wicked people Lia comes from?

"Sky… I'm sorry… it was me against the gate." Dani said. Tears were streaming down her face and as my face was rubbing in the sand, I couldn't break my gaze with her.

Those tears… those same tears were there when Domin died as well, and what did I do about it? I couldn't protect him, I couldn't save him, I couldn't even speak to him as he took his final breaths. When I looked at Dani, I couldn't help but remember him.

Thinking of Domin being ripped apart, along with Carl and Dani. That thought alone was insufferable to me, it forced my mental state into a spiral of confused rage. I only wanted to kill Raven, kill Ellie, kill Lia, kill Orion. That's all I could think about right now… killing.

Even past saving, I only wanted to kill every last one of these people in my home, slaughtering our animals and destroying our hard work. Had they known about how much we've lost and how hard it was to become stable, they wouldn't have destroyed our lives… but they don't care, because they're not in our position.

An attitude so easily observable in everybody I've met on the other side. It doesn't matter how hard we have it, because they have it easy. It's easy to want to kill me, to burn me alive, to push hungry wolves into my home, to kill my friends, to break in, to destroy everything because it wasn't happening to them.

All I could think about was wiping the smirks off of all of their sadistic faces. I wanted to rip their faces off, bathe in their blood… I wanted to hurt every single one of the outsiders in my base. If I could just find a weapon… but after all that, I can't. My system can't become corrupt, so again, I lie here in the sand, thinking:

How was this fair at all?

Thrown onto a beach with no memories, forced to play against everybody with better technology, aimed at as the nationwide target for all of these outsiders, and I can't even kill anybody. What kind of bullshit was that?!

It was bullshit that wasn't made by me… it doesn't matter to the person who made it this way, because they didn't have to suffer through the same rules as me, just as everything else worked.

Rage boiled in my blood, and I pushed up against the foot laid on my neck.

"Woah, this stone still has a fight in him!" I pushed his foot off of me and he tried to slam the blunt end of his one-sided blade into me. In retaliation, I punched his elbow, inverting it from the original shape.

"You bastard!" He took a slash, and my system warned me again, giving me the opportunity to expect an attack. I back-stepped but was caught by one of his soldiers. He put his arms around mine and pushed me to the ground.

"Shoot that one in the stomach," Raven yelled out.

"REN!" I heard one of the girls shout out. Now that I see them, those were the girls Dani worked with to make her special project for me. Rin and Ren, if I remember them properly.

Ren had an arrow in the side of her stomach and was starting to bleed. It wasn't in a fatal place, but it probably still didn't feel good. That was my fault… I'm just hurting more people the more I resist.

"Heh, you got your arm broken by the White Stone. How embarrassing." Raven said, kicking Carl in the stomach.

"For every bone you break after that elbow in my group, I'll break ten of yours. And I'll start with all of his ribs." I bit my tongue, suppressing the rage, but stopped once I felt the taste of blood. I spit out the warm liquid with a face of disgust.

Like an itch in my head, the feeling just wouldn't go away. Raven moved over to the second house and took it down completely in five swings.

"So weak… does that remind you of anybody, White Stone?" He asked me, trotting back and forth while walking to the next house.

If I could kill… this would've never happened! My damn System… it limits me from being safe! I'm just supposed to use other people to fight for me, like some damn coward! Just like that man… Orion.

This is what this is… Raven is with Orion, so are Dante and Lia, and now even Ellie is. This anger… he's not even fighting me as a White Stone, and this fact alone was starting to pry at my stomach. This rage I felt… was insatiable.

I looked up towards Raven and wiped the drool away from my mouth. What the hell was wrong with me?

"Oh, are you feeling hungry? Maybe this will help…" Raven picked up one of the several wild cats we found by its legs and pulled it apart, breaking them instantly. The cat cried out for help as Raven slammed it to the ground. His labored breathing stopped after a while and Raven picked the cat back up by its tail.

This rage was starting to make me dizzy, I felt as if I couldn't even sit up properly. I could hear Dani whimper more and more to my right, and more drool started to puddle on the ground beneath me. Why couldn't I hold this in?

"Go on. Eat it. Raw." Raven held the cat up to my mouth, but I kept it closed, staring at him with hateful eyes.

"Fine! If a bite isn't taken out of that cat in five seconds, I'll cut off her legs." Raven pointed at Dani and her whimper silenced.

---

I must've lost consciousness or something, but I couldn't do that, or else I'd be putting Dani in danger. I opened my eyes, but this place was unfamiliar to me. Surrounded by blackened water on an infinite plane lit up by the dim moonlight, I looked all around me. The more I stared into the water, the more of a reflection I could see of myself.

I tried reaching to him, but my hand was quickly stopped by the sharpness of the water. Like sliding my hand into a bucket of needles, it hurt to even touch it. I had shoes on, so it didn't hurt my feet, but I couldn't even begin to tap it as lightly as possible.

"Isn't this an interesting place?" I turned behind me, watching what looked like a copy of myself walk past me, looking back upon me as he pushed forward to infinity.

"You almost wonder what life would be like if you were stronger, right? I mean, everybody thinks like that, but what can you do?" I fell to my knees, feeling the needles lightly press against my skin through my pants.

"I can't do anything," I told the figure. He kept walking forward, the voice slowly fading out.

"No… you can do something, but I just think you're too afraid to try it." He said, before completely fading away.

---

I opened my eyes after blinking once more and the cat was still in front of me.

"Two!" Raven counted down.

I shut my eyes tightly and bit into the cat. The fur filled my mouth, but I pierced its skin and pulled a chunk of meat off of his body, and then proceeded to spit it on the floor.

A sick feeling in my stomach started to rise up, and I threw up all over the floor. A mixture of blood and vomit poured from my mouth and Raven started to laugh harder than I've ever heard anybody.

"How interesting! Isn't it unique what you can make a man do when you have him by the balls like this?" He yelled out.

Again… and again… the same thing. Doing this to me… is unforgivable. I muttered under my breath, not even understanding it myself. Ellie pushed her hand down on my neck and my face hit the pile of vomit and blood puddled on the ground.

"Say that again? I couldn't hear you." I turned my head towards Carl and saw him reaching for a weapon in the man's pocket to his side. He was going in for the kill, but it would be suicide if he did it with no support.

Dammit Sky! What can I do? There has to be something I can do to help him! Something I can do…

[System Alert! Corruption at 85%]