Watching From Above

--Sky's Perspective--

I fell to the floor out of my chair and could finally, yet barely, move my legs.

I've been able to focus on the fight down below the house, simply by closing my eyes and looking through the floor with my golden strands. I've been outlining everything... but I saw something even more frightening.

There were strands leading not from Illya, but into her. I could see them flowing straight into her. I know that Myth died... I know that Shike is still alive... I know that he's somewhere up here, and I need the strength to find him.

And as I explained... Illya's getting power from somewhere.

It's me.

I hadn't realized before, but Illya, upon touching me, connected strands to my body and is powering herself with them. As soon as I found out, I cut the strand, and I could barely move my legs. I was close to regaining my stamina, and the fight itself was starting to turn in Belle's favor.

Everybody is using their SIM. Their appearance are changing accordingly, to the person that matters the most to them, based on how Belle's appearance mimicked Shike.

I can't go down there, not with my current strength. If I stood against Illya, she'd only take more power from me and use it against my friends. I needed to stay far away, so she couldn't reconnect the strands to me to take more power.

These damn strands... they've been confusing ever since I first learned about them. The abilities used by Shike, Belle, Alexia, Boo, Mitra, and Myth can all be used by both Illya and I.

And it started to make sense, as I used Belle's ability to summon the ice wall to protect my friends during the war.

The strands can even sap power from others as well. They're so advanced... I can't even fathom everything you can do with them. However, knowing that Illya was stealing them for me struck me deeply in the heart. It feels like I'm killing my friends...

I need to have faith in them... in everybody who is left.

And to help them, I'll bring back Shike.

Slowly, yet surely, I planted my foot into the ground and rose my body up with the help of my arms.

This fatigue is killing me... but... I need to move!

I threw myself at the stairs and collapsed down, colliding with the watery floor and realizing the scene behind this fake house had vanished away into the Black Lake.

This is where Shike would be... according to Illya...

Pushing myself to my feet again wasn't as hard as it was the first time, but walking was a different story. To think, this entire time I was a powerhouse for Illya's power...

It pissed me off.

In fact, this was all pissing me off. I felt totally useless, knowing that I can't keep anybody safe and that I'm putting my friends in harm's way just to save my pathetic life. I want to do something useful, if anything at all, for all my friends.

One step...

I put my foot down and moved my body.

The Wrath was starting to swell within me. It was making my breathing shortened. It was making me hate more and more of my past enemies... but something I never even thought about...

Was that I hate myself.

That was my problem, this entire time.

I've always been powerless, no matter how many strands or unreal powers I gained, the hate for myself never dwindled.

It sucks to keep thinking about it, but ever since I lost Domin, I've never been myself.

My motivation, my powers, everything was fueled by Wrath. It was the wish from my mom's dying breath that finally awakened something in me.

She told me to promise her that I won't be lost in hatred...

I tried to understand that, but I couldn't, as I will never forgive Illya. It wasn't until I hit the floor of that balcony, that I realized what she truly meant.

Mom didn't want me to be lost in my hatred for myself. To promise her that I wouldn't let the Wrath run my life. And then, she told me that I would always be the Deity of Wrath to everybody, and always be her son to her.

That's exactly it. I am the Deity of Wrath. But, I don't have to hate myself to have that title.

I need to accept it... all of it.

I could never beat Illya because of how much more refined she is. I cried while thinking about it. I have to learn to forgive myself and to forget what has happened.

On the opposite side of things, if I forgot about those things and became a being like Illya, I would become the very thing I would never want to be. How do I forgive myself for that? I got them killed!

I can't blame them for dying! We were all weak...

It's unfair of me to think that they were weaker, just because they are dead, right?

Domin did say it himself... he isn't cut out for hunting...

No... where ever my mind is going, it needs to stop.

I'm okay.

I can say it all I want. "I forgive myself" is a phrase that I can repeat over and over again, and not mean it until far into the future. In fact, I'm not sure if right now I can do my best to really mean what I'm saying...

However, I'll continue to try my best, and eventually, it will become the truth.

Domin may have died, but Carl was able to live. The same applies to Red, Ullr, and everybody. I was able to keep my friends alive.

This has to be enough.

Another foot forward.

And another.

And another.

I will find you, Shike. I have to depend on you to help everybody... Belle, Boo, Mitra... just hold out a little longer.

I'm doing my best.