Chapter 396

As Nora slept in his arms, Christian listened to the sound of the waves outside. He would always correlate that sound to her now. The sea is Nora. Nora is the sea. He sighed, jet lag was a thing of course, but it wasn't the only reason he couldn't sleep. After what she had said in the restaurant the day before, he wasn't sure what was happening between them or what could. He couldn't tell her who he was. He couldn't tell her because she despised him and didn't even know it. Any hope he had, left with that statement. Was there anyway to make it work now? He wasn't sure. He knew one thing, she felt like home. Smelled like home. And the need to possess and care for her was so carnally intense that he couldn't fight it, even if he wanted to. What now? He stood up and walked to the balcony. He watched the waves coming in and going out under the moonlight.

He heard a beep and realized it wasn't his phone. He looked around and saw an iPad on the outdoor table. She must have left it there. He picked it up to place it inside to keep it out of the elements, when the screen lit up. He noticed a text message notification from someone named Marcus. He didn't want to snoop so he sat it down on the desk in the room. Then two more beeps. Who was Marcus? Her father? Maybe it was an emergency? He swiped the screen to find it didn't lock. He tapped the message icon and read them.

"Nora, please. I don't know what's happened but I haven't heard from you in four days. I hate when you do this. What did I do to deserve this? You know I'm going to be a mess when you don't respond. I thought things were getting better?"

Then another.

"Just text me and let me know you're alright. I love you."

And another.

"I'm going crazy here. Where are you? Fuck Nora! Please tell me you're not THERE again. That you're not going to go THERE again! Please call me. I can't bear it."

She has someone, Christian thought. She's involved. Married? Maybe she lied? Oh god. Is he just a fling? Some wild, crazy sexual ride that she is using him for? Christian, are you a fool? This entire time, I'm thinking about the future, about what we could be and she could possibly just be wanting an affair. "Enjoy the ride while it lasts…" Jason's words. Is that what he was trying to tell him?

He needed to stop. She had no commitment or obligation to him. She didn't even know who he was for Christ's sake! His head was a mess. This woman had infiltrated his entire being and he couldn't let it get the best of him. He looked at her, asleep in bed. She's so beautiful. So smart. And funny. She makes him feel so alive. He thought about it for a moment and then he smiled. Every time he thinks of her skin, her scent, her eyes, her laugh, he smiled. And that smile he wears now is worth it. She is worth it. He decided not to ask her about the texts. It would all come together. He just had to find a way to tell her who he was.

The next morning, he packed his things while she stood, watching in her robe.

He looked over at her. "Everything alright?" He asked.

She shook her head. "Not really." She said. He walked over to her and put his hands on her shoulders.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"It was difficult to leave you after Scotland and this time it's even worse. I, I don't want to not be near you. I'm sorry. I know our lives are complicated and we live so far apart but it still sucks, you know?" She said. He smiled.

"Yes. I know." He said, kissing her forehead.

"I want to see you again. Soon. How can we make that work?" She asked.

"I am going to look at my schedule for the next couple of months. Maybe I can fly you out to London. We will figure this out." Christian said, trying to convince himself just as much.

"Okay." She said. She looked so sad. It ripped his heart apart. He grabbed his bag and kissed her, pulling her to him. She felt so perfect for him, fitting into his arms and curling into his body.

"I will count the days until I see you again. We WILL figure this out." He said. She nodded. He walked to the door and looked back at her, smiling. "Thank you for the lovely time here. And thank you, for you." He said and he opened the door, walking down the hall and out of the hotel.