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RWBY: I Need to Cheat on My Girlfriend

The protagonist is kidnapped by a capricious god and thrown into the world of RWBY, where social and sexual rules are completely reversed. Here, women take the initiative in relationships, while men assume a passive role. In this strange and twisted universe, he is given a mission: he must find a girlfriend and cheat on her, or face the punishment of testicular torsion. Author's Note: I'm not a writer; I just thought this would be fun to create.

SalveYing · Tranh châm biếm
Không đủ số lượng người đọc
35 Chs

Mantis Shrimp

[Xiao Long Cabin]

Yang was worried about her sister. Ruby had been really depressed lately, barely eating cookies and hardly polishing her Crescent Rose. The reason wasn't a mystery; Ruby had made some mistakes on her first date. Of course, if you consider making your date pay a 30,000 Liens bill a small problem, Ruby took it as if the world was ending. Her thoughts were cut short when she heard moans from Ruby's room.

She walked to Ruby's room and found her with the scroll in hand, pacing back and forth in circles in her room. She ignored Yang, her full attention on the scroll.

Yang proceeded to snatch the scroll from Ruby. At the feeling of the movement, Ruby reacted immediately.

"Yang, no!" Ruby shouted, trying to grab the scroll, but Yang kept her away with one hand. Ruby, being much shorter, couldn't reach her.

Yang checked the message and realized it was for Daniel. Reading it, she blushed slightly, finding it embarrassing.

"How long have you been writing this message?" Yang asked, with a mix of surprise and amusement.

Ruby, looking at the floor, answered timidly, " One hour."

"And you're still not sure if you should send it?" Yang asked, raising an eyebrow while keeping the scroll out of Ruby's reach.

Ruby nodded slowly, still uncertain. "Yeah... I'm not sure."

The unmistakable sound of a message being sent came from the scroll. Yang had sent it without warning, and a satisfied smile spread across her face. Ruby, on the other hand, had an expression of disbelief and horror.

"Yang, how could you do this to me!" Ruby exclaimed, unable to believe what had just happened. Her sister had betrayed her in the most unexpected way.

Yang looked at her with a mix of defiance and amusement. "Ruby, you can live with failure, but regret is something that follows you for life. Or so says the Internet. Basically, I'm doing you a favor."

Ruby, with her gaze fixed on the floor, replied anxiously. "I wasn't ready yet. I'm not mentally prepared for this."

Just then, the sound of a new message being received emerged from the scroll. Yang said to Ruby with a mischievous grin, "Look, they've already replied."

Ruby reacted immediately, grabbing the scroll and throwing it out the window in a panic. Yang looked at her, surprised.

"Ruby! What the hell was that?" Yang asked, incredulity in her voice.

Ruby, with a mixture of embarrassment and frustration, admitted,"I panicked. I couldn't handle it."

"Let's go find your scroll. We need to see what it says," Yang said, dragging Ruby out of the house to search for the scroll. They found it in Zwei's mouth, who had been playing with it. There was a small scuffle for the scroll, with some dog slobber splattering everywhere.

Finally, with the scroll in hand, Ruby tried to read it, but her nerves were getting in the way. "I can't read it," Ruby said.

Yang, with a sly grin, grabbed the scroll and started reading the message.

"What does it say?" Ruby asked impatiently. "Do I get a second chance or do I need to escape to Atlas and create a new identity? TELL ME!"

Yang laughed, enjoying the moment. "You should read it yourself. The answer is going to make you very happy."

Ruby took the scroll from Yang's hands and began to read. Suddenly, she squealed with joy. "HE SAID YES! I'm getting a second chance! It's not all ruined yet!"

Ruby's screams attracted their mother, Summer, who came out to see what was happening. She saw her younger daughter bouncing around, full of excitement.

"What's up with Ruby?" Summer asked, concerned.

Yang replied with a grin. "She's getting a second date."

"Oh, that's wonderful," said Summer, going to hug Ruby. "I'm so happy. My girls are growing up. Just make sure you don't scam him with hundreds of Liens again."

Summer's words froze Ruby. "How did you know?" Ruby asked, scared.

"Yang told me," Summer replied with a smile.

"YANG!" Ruby yelled. "I can't believe you told her.!"

"Ruby, tell me, have you already thought about where you're going to take him?" Summer asked, trying to change the subject.

"Yes," Ruby answered. She'd been thinking about it since her first date ended. "But, Yang, you know I'm going to need transportation... so, how about you lend me your motorcycle?"

"No," Yang responded coldly.

"But, Yang," Ruby insisted, "arriving on a motorcycle will definitely make me look cool."

"Then make an impression with something else," Yang said, not giving in.

Summer could only laugh at her daughters' interactions, enjoying the moment.

[Daniel Hawk's Apartment]

Daniel was sprawled on the floor, doing push-ups while sweat trickled down his body. He could barely make any pained noises, and if he were fully conscious, he would feel more than just exhaustion. On top of him, a mantis shrimp was tugging at his hair, making "Bzz! Bzz! Bzz! Bzz!" sounds. ""Work, lazy!"" the mantis shrimp said.

*5 hours earlier*

In an apartment in the city of Vale, Daniel was bustling around his kitchen as birds chirped and the sun shone. He was in the middle of baking cookies. He was gathering and preparing all the necessary ingredients when he suddenly realized he had forgotten the secret ingredient.

"Oh, silly me forgot the secret ingredient," Daniel said in a soft tone. He proceeded to spit into the cookie dough, applying his 'Aphrodisiac Essence' ability. With a proud smile, he mixed the dough again, rolled it into balls, flattened them, added chips, and put them in the oven.

Fifteen minutes later, he pulled out a tray of perfectly baked cookies. Daniel went outside and paid a kid to distribute the cookies. The kid was very grateful and happy, and Daniel reminded him not to eat them.

From his apartment balcony, Daniel watched as the kid handed out the cookies. A woman who had taken one of the cookies didn't get very far before her expression changed. "OHH!" she said, crossing her legs. After taking another bite of the cookie, the same reaction happened again. Every person who ate a cookie seemed to experience the same phenomenon.

Some tried to come back for more cookies, but the kid refused, following Daniel's instructions, one per person. Some even tried to pay, but the kid refused that too. Soon, people started gathering around the kid, forming a growing crowd. The crowd pressure became so intense that the kid began to be chased by an anxious mob for more cookies.

Soon, the kid gave in and decided to abandon the cookies. It was the best decision he could make, tossing the cookies to the ground, but that didn't stop the crowd. People began to scramble for the cookies on the ground with frenzy. All who ate the cookies showed faces of pure pleasure. Although there was an excited crowd, curiously, no orgy occurred. Apparently, even though they felt the effects of the ability, the excitement couldn't be directed towards anyone else but Daniel. "Good to know," Daniel thought.

"Maybe I should sell them," Daniel considered, watching the scene seriously. However, he soon got bored and decided to go back inside.

He closed the balcony door before anyone could see him and went back to his apartment. There, he received a message from Ruby Rose. The message was extremely embarrassing.

"Hi, Daniel. It's Ruby. Well, I've been thinking a lot about... us and, um, I was wondering if you'd like to go out with me again. I mean, I don't want to sound desperate or anything, but... I promise I won't do anything weird this time. No weird stuff, I promise! I'd just... love to have another chance to make things right. We could go to... somewhere fun, if you'd like. You don't have to say yes if you don't want to, really. Just... please think about it. I'm sorry if this sounds super awkward and weird! 🙈"

Daniel read the message and couldn't help but laugh to himself. "What a weirdo," he thought. Despite the embarrassing nature of the message, he accepted the second date and proceeded to save the scroll with his response and began preparing for something more exciting: the gacha, the only way, for now, to gain more power.

Daniel sighed and, without thinking too much, gave the order to the system. "Start the gacha. Just two pulls."

[Starting Gacha…]

"Come on, don't waste my time," Daniel muttered, crossing his arms.

[Item obtained: Exclusive Eye Package] [Creature obtained: Pistol Shrimp - Ratatouille]

"Let's start with the eye package," Daniel said, not too excited or getting his hopes up. He knew this drill and knew that, somehow, they would be trash, but even trash could be useful.

"System, give me the description of the eye package," Daniel ordered.

[Loading description…]

[Special and Exclusive Eye Package from different worlds. Includes: Sharingan, Rinnegan, Byakugan, Geass, Shinigami Eyes, Kaneki Ken's Eyes, Demon King's Eyes, Mystic Eyes of Death Perception, Allen Walker's Eyes, Yuno Gasai's Eyes]

Daniel studied the list closely. It was an impressive collection of eyes with various abilities and powers. The doubt troubled him. "Where's the catch?"

The easiest to guess: I can't use the Sharingan, Rinnegan, Byakugan because they need chakra. I can't use Geass because it needs magic, I think. Shinigami Eyes are just normal eyes unless I have a contract with a shinigami, and I'm not giving up part of my life. Kaneki Ken's Eyes are useless except for turning black and going emo. Demon King's Eyes... again, magic. Mystic Eyes of Death Perception, I have no idea what those are, and Yuno Gasai's Eyes are just pink.

It could be worse; maybe in the future I'll get some of those energies and be able to use them," Daniel thought. "System, give me the ocular package," he ordered

At that moment, out of nowhere, a cooler began to materialize on the floor in front of Daniel.

Daniel stared at the cooler and could only whisper, "Please, no, system." He took his time, approached the cooler, and opened it. Inside, he found what he feared: ten jars, each with two eyes respectively labeled, and a note on top of it all. Daniel picked up the note and closed the cooler.

The note said, "Instructions: Keep the eyes in the jars and refrigerated."

Daniel crumpled the note and tossed it aside.

He took a moment to think about the situation. He knew he couldn't easily get rid of the eyes. If he threw them down the drain and someone found them by chance, they could probably trace them back to him. Could they? Surely, there are all kinds of semblances. Besides, he saw no immediate use for them; no one would want to transplant eyes of dubious origin.

He took a deep breath to release his worry. "I'm fine," he whispered to himself.

He walked to the living room, grabbed the cooler, and took it to the kitchen. He opened the fridge, removed some items to make space for the ten jars, stored them, and closed the fridge door. "That will be a problem for Future Daniel. Maybe he'll figure out what to do with the eyes."

Daniel instructed the system to provide the description of the Mantis Shrimp, deliberately ignoring the fact that he now had eyes in his refrigerator next to the yogurt, like a damn psychopath.

"Give me the description of the Mantis Shrimp."

[Loading description…]

[Congratulations! You have unlocked the Mantis Shrimp, a marine creature that combines beauty and power in a single package. With a vibrant and multicolored body, this creature is both a work of art and a combat machine. Its hypersensitive eyes see what others cannot, and its powerful hammer claws can break shells and bones in an instant.]

Daniel remained silent, staring incredulously at what he had just obtained. He already knew exactly what it was; who doesn't know the best animal in the world? And of course, who hasn't seen the best movie of all time, Ratatouille?

Daniel gave the system the order to summon the creature. In front of him, the Mantis Shrimp began to materialize. Its elongated body was covered by a shiny exoskeleton with shades of green, blue, and purple blending subtly. Its large, independent eyes moved with curiosity, exploring the surroundings. The front appendages, resembling small claws, were close to its body. It was only about 10 cm long.

As soon as the Mantis Shrimp appeared, it began making angry noises. "Bzzzzzzzz!" Daniel had suspected this, so he stopped it abruptly. "STOP! I know what you're going to say; it's not the first time this has happened. Before you run away, listen to me: I won't stop you if you decide to go to the ocean. In fact, the coast is relatively close. I'll take you and set you free, I swear," he said, placing his hand on his chest.

Daniel wasn't lying. Since his last encounter with a summoned creature, he had decided not to force any other creature to help him. The humiliation wasn't worth it.

The Mantis Shrimp looked at him in silence. Its large eyes moved with curiosity, and suddenly, it snapped its claws with a firm sound, "Klik-klak-klak." It was a sound that, translated, meant something like "speak, inferior creature." Daniel understood the message perfectly and decided to speak honestly.

"My name is Daniel, and I was brought to this world almost the same way you were. My greatest wish, my most cherished dream, is simply to survive. I'm willing to do whatever it takes to achieve it," he said, trying to connect with the Mantis Shrimp on a deeper level.

"So, let me ask you, Mantis, what is your dream that you're willing to do anything for?" The Mantis Shrimp remained silent for a moment, its antennae moving slowly as it seemed to ponder its answer. Finally, it began to emit intermittent sounds, "Bzzz-bzzz-bzzz."

The Mantis Shrimp revealed that its dream was to become a combat champion. It used to live on a private balcony overlooking the arena, where it spent hours watching the fights. Its greatest desire was to be like those fighters, fighting to the end with body and soul. The passion in its sounds was evident, but there was also a shadow of discouragement. The Mantis Shrimp seemed disheartened, admitting that it felt Daniel might not be able to help it achieve that dream.

Daniel, though not surprised by the response, expected something like this. Excited, he replied, "But I can help you! We can help each other." The Mantis Shrimp looked at him with skepticism, its independent eyes moving rapidly, as if trying to read the sincerity in his face.

"Let me show you," Daniel said, slowly approaching the Mantis Shrimp. Although it was visibly uneasy, it didn't move. There was a mix of distrust and hope in its stance, as if evaluating whether this human could really keep his promise. However, it was willing to do whatever was necessary, and if Daniel had a way to help it achieve its dream, it was ready to take the risk.

With gentle and careful movements, Daniel picked it up and placed it on his head. The Mantis Shrimp, now in an unexpected place, felt completely confused, its eyes spinning in all directions as it tried to understand what was happening.

Daniel instructed the Mantis Shrimp, "Use your claws or whatever to gently pull at my hair." The Mantis Shrimp obeyed and tugged at one of Daniel's hairs with its claw. This caused Daniel's arm to rise involuntarily.

"Bzzzz? Bzzz?" asked the Mantis, which translated to something like, "What was that?"

Daniel chuckled, "You control me."

The Mantis Shrimp froze for a moment, processing what that implied. After a brief analysis, the Mantis grabbed more hair and began experimenting. Left foot, right foot, it tried walking, right hand, left hand. Daniel said with a smile, "Relax, haha, this will take time."

The Mantis began making him walk around the room, moving him clumsily. "Bzzz-bzzz," said the Mantis. Daniel listened and asked, "What problem could there be?"

"Bzzz-bzzz," replied the Mantis. "How come I'm not useful?" asked Daniel, puzzled.

"Bzzz-bzzz," explained the Mantis, translated as, "You have muscles, but they're just for show, not strong."

Suddenly, the Mantis made a jerky movement, and Daniel's fist shot towards the wall. "AHHHH!" Daniel yelled, "Why did you do that?"

"Bzzz-bzzz," replied the Mantis with some disdain, "You have princess hands, delicate, never thrown a punch."

Despite the pain, Daniel wasn't ready to give up. "Then help me! Help me become strong enough to survive. And with a strong enough body, you can have all the fights you want."

"Bzzz-bzzz," responded the Mantis, (But I wouldn't be the one fighting.)

"It won't be your body, but your movements, and if you shape me, it will be your strength," Daniel explained seriously.

The Mantis Shrimp stayed silent for a moment before responding with a simple, "Bzzz-bzzz," meaning "Alright."

Daniel smiled, considering it a victory. "We'll need practice, body control training," he added.

"Bzzz-bzzz," said the Mantis, (We'll need you to train.)

"How should I call you?" Daniel asked.

"Bzzz-bzzz," replied the Mantis, (Aegis.)

"Alright, Aegis, I should take you off my head," Daniel said, raising his hands to do so.

But instead of letting him, Aegis pulled his hair hard, knocking him to the ground on his chest. "Bzzz-bzzz," declared the Mantis with determination. (Not time to rest, it's time to train.)

Daniel, exhausted, tried to reason, "Maybe we should take this slowly."

"Bzzz-bzzz," (Not slow, train!) responded Aegis, relentless, forcing him to do push-ups, sit-ups, and squats without rest. Hours passed, and Daniel couldn't do anything to stop it. Aegis's control over his body was greater than he had imagined; even when he wanted to cry and couldn't move, Aegis wouldn't let him stop.

"Bzzz-bzzz," (no pain, no gain), said Aegis, as it continued to push Daniel's body to the limit. Aegis's control was improving rapidly, and the training was relentless. Daniel had never worked so hard in his life.

"Bzzz-bzzz," (this will be the daily training), added Aegis, after what seemed like at least five hours of pure pain.

Daniel, breathing heavily, didn't want to question it, but felt he had to ask. "How do you even know if these workouts are correct?"

Aegis looked at him with disdain. "Bzzz-bzzz!! (I lived in a ring, more precisely, in a private balcony aquarium that belonged to what you would call a gangster. Every fight was more brutal than the last; many people didn't leave alive. And when they weren't fighting, they were training. I saw it all, memorized it all, saw the champions and the losers, what they did right and what they did wrong. Enough talk, get up, you have shopping to do.)"

Daniel, still lying on the floor, asked doubtfully, "Shopping?"

"Klik-klak-klak!" (Yes, shopping. I need certain things: an aquarium, the best you can get, and my food. I warn you, kid, my food isn't cheap. If you can't provide it, forget about my help.)

Daniel remained on the floor, feeling exhaustion in every fiber of his being. "But I can't move…" he murmured.

"Klik-klak" Aegis made a snapping sound, (That can be fixed). With a strong pull, it yanked him by his hair, forcing his body to get up and head towards the door.

"Wait," protested Daniel, "I can't be seen with a shrimp on my head walking down the street."

"Klik? Klik?" Aegis asked curiously, (What do you suggest?)

Daniel pointed to a beret on the coat rack. "Grab the beret."

Aegis took it and placed it on Daniel's head. Daniel, unsure, asked, "Can you see?"

"Klik-klak! Klik!" Aegis laughed, (Haha, I can see more than you ever could in your lifetime. Compared to me, you're blind.)

With the beret on, Daniel and Aegis went out into the street. What followed was a repeat of Ruby Rose's story: Aegis took everything it wanted. A 2000 lien aquarium, clams at 50 liens each, a water purifier. But it didn't stop there; the pet store was too close to the sports store.

Aegis forced him to buy weights, exercise machines, sandbags, all cash. The final bill came to an incredible 50000 liens. Daniel didn't understand what was happening to his money; the more he had, the more he lost.

 

Author's Thoughts: Although mantis shrimps normally live in water, for plot reasons, they now also inhabit land. Additionally, the protagonist can understand animals, but this doesn't mean he can communicate with all of them; only with those that have their own language. Pokémon, although they only say one phrase, convey a real message. In the case of the mantis shrimp, coming from the Ratatouille universe, it also has its own language. Does this make sense? Honestly, I just made it up while writing this message. Haha!

Here's an image of Aegis.

Author's Thoughts 2: I realized I have no idea how to write a romantic relationship, so the first mission will likely be completed in the next chapter. There's still a gacha. Any suggestions?

I always like to read comments, so feel free to leave yours.