Chapter 87: Where is Song Ze Lin?

"Oh right, where's Ze Lin? If he knew I was in a coma he would have definitely flown back and come and see me," I asked. Mum didn't know how to explain so she nudged my father who nudged her back. "Xiao Qing, I'm Ze Lin. I've been here all the time you just haven't seen me," Song Ze Yu mumbled as he walked beside my bed and held my hands. His actions were so gentle, that I might have feel for it if I didn't see his clear wrist. 

I grabbed his wrists and muttered "You are not my Ah Lin," Song Ze 'Lin' laughed and asked me why I was saying that. "Ze Yu, stop acting. I grew up with both of you. I know whose who. You are not Ah Lin," I exclaimed glaring at him. I've noticed his temperament seemed to have grown quite well. He acted like an adult now, not a kid who would always say he loved me. 

"Xiao Qing, you have just lost your memory, I won't blame you that you can't even tell me apart," laughed Ze Yu as he took his arm away from my hand. I grabbed his other hand and rolled up his sleeve to his elbow. Still nothing there. "Song Ze Yu cut it out. You ain't Ze Lin. His wrist isn't as smooth as yours. Ah, Lin used to cut himself when he felt a lot of pain coming from his body. He left a lot of scars. . Also, before he left for the USA I went with him to a tattoo shop and he tattooed both hands with a heliotrope flower which symbolises eternal love. Even if you had plastic surgery done there will always be some marks left. Both of your arms are empty and clear as fuck," I mumbled as Ze Yu looked at me guilty. "Ze Yu, if you still treat me as your best friend, then tell me where exactly is Song Ze Lin" I shouted  in agitation. With a very passing moment I was having a really bad feeling that I don't like.

"You know sometimes I hope you can be a little dumb," he laughed whilst removing himself from clutching his own hands. "Hui Qing, it doesn't matter where he is. What matters is you. Me and Ze Lin are identical twins. Just treat me like him. I don't mind. You don't need to know the truth, it's better this way," he exclaimed.

"Song Ze Yu what the hell are you talking about?" I asked, "You and Ah Lin are two different people, there is no way I can't treat you guys the same. Now tell me where the hell is Song Ze Lin."

I noticed that Song Ze Yu took a big breath and was about to tell me when my older brother opened his big mouth. "Hui Qing, Song Ze Lin is perfectly fine. He is working overseas. No one told him because we didn't want to worry him," he mumbled. I smiled and muttered, "Liar. Every time you lie, you will always look into the person's eye as if you think they won't believe you,". Huai Zhan laughed and looked at his parents for support.

"Hui Qing the thing with Ze Lin he is..." Song Ze Yu began before he was rudely interrupted by my other brother.

"Eh Ah Yu are you really going to tell her?" Huai Ning asked as he nodded. "She's going to find out sooner or later," he exclaimed.

"Hui Qing, don't panic when you hear me say this but, Song Ze Lin died 3 years ago when he was 19 on 9 August 2019 on that very eventful plane," my whole body froze as I heard what Song Ze Yu said. I smiled and began to laugh/cry.

"Haha, Ah Yu why will you say something like that? Don't joke about stuff like that," I added. Ah Yu looked at me seriously and declared "I'm not joking, why would I joke about stuff like this? Ze Lin is also my little brother. I would never say stuff like this,".

Tears began to flow freely from my face. What is going on I gently wiped the tears from my face. I spoke up saying "So you're saying that Ah Lin died 3 years ago and I forgot all about it?" I asked to confirm with him. He nodded and I bursted out laughing.

"How did he die?" I asked with a shaky voice. The random dude on my left tried to embrace me but I pushed him away. "3 years ago, Ze Lin died on a plane that had lost control. The plane was flying back to China," he uttered. My whole world froze again. "Because of what I said? He took an earlier flight. He wouldn't have had an accident if I didn't say I missed him and begged him to come back earlier. He wouldn't have died if it wasn't for me," I cried.

The man I have loved since I was a little kid was dead. Dead. He had been dead for 3 years yet I didn't know. I don't remember what the hell. I clutched my head a screamed in panic before I fainted again.