The Name Game

With the distraction of the Reaper now gone, it was time to get back to business.

<Now, we need to get you familiarized with how the System works so you can start leveling up> The System's words brought her back to the situation at hand.

"Oh, that's right. The game!" she said enthusiastically. She loved playing games. Even though she never won any. But she was always so happy when her friends won.

<Yes. The game> the System replied.

"You said my friends can play with me, right?" She wanted to be sure she'd heard it correctly.

<Oh, yes. You're 'friends' will definitely be playing with you> the System repeated its earlier statement. She didn't catch the disdainful way it said 'friends' nor the ominous tone of the entire statement. She was too sweet and gullible to catch the nuances of language.

"What are the rules of this game?"

<Simple. You must perform tasks to level up>

"Okay" she said unsure. "Sounds easy enough, I guess."

<Now, to help you, let's outline some basic rules> the System said.

"Wait!" she interrupted.

<Now what?> The System asked impatiently. <You have a great deal to learn and little time to do it>

"What is your name?"

<My what?>

"Name. What do I call you?"

<I am the Diabolical System 666: Ultimate Demon-maker> it said proudly.

"I can't call you that." She said firmly.

<Why not?>

"Everyone should have a name. Even a System."

<I already told you my name>

"But I can't call you that." She repeated.

<Why not?>

"Well, it's long and cumbersome. And…it's not very nice."

She thought she heard the System snort derisively.

"I need a way to contact you, right? A name makes it easier. Especially if I'm in a hurry."

<I guess so> the System replied sounding not entirely convinced.

"Great!" she clapped her hands excitedly. "Since you don't have one of your own, can I name you?"

<Fine> The System didn't sound too pleased. <But I won't accept it if I don't like it> it warned.

"Alright. Deal. We'll decide on one together, okay?"

<Deal>

"First, are you a boy or a girl?"

<What? I'm a System>

"Well, you sound like a boy so…" she began. Then she suddenly thought of something that disturbed her. "Oh! I'm not sure I like a boy being my head. It seems…improper." She mused.

<I AM A SYSTEM> it practically yelled at her.

"Okay. Okay. No need to be so touchy. I didn't mean to imply that you were perverted or anything.

A chuckle echoed through her head. <Nothing wrong with being perverted> it said mischievously.

"Yes, there is!" she cried horrified.

"Now, let's see what would be an appropriate name?" She was having a very difficult time thinking of one.

<Lucifer> suggested the System.

"Oh, no!"

<Satanus>

"Never!"

<Beelzebub>

"Absolutely not!"

<How about Damien?>

She seemed to consider that for a moment, then realized it was frequently used as the name of the Antichrist in popular fiction.

"No. I'm not going to call you anything that means 'child of the devil.'"

<So, Diablo is out?>

"Of course! I can't call you that."

<Dahmer?>

"Isn't that a serial killer's name?"

<Yes> the System admitted.

"Yikes!" she replied. "We might as well call you the Nightstalker or the Strangler."

<I'd accept that>

"That was not a suggestion!"

<Then why did you say it?>

"Let's try something else." She said resolutely, refusing to answer its question.

<Hitler. Stalin. Atilla.>

"No mass murderers of any type."

<Oh. Why?> She was so guileless that she didn't even realize It was teasing her.

"Why? Because they're human monsters!"

<Dracul. Vlad. Frankenstein. Nosferatu.>

"No humanoid monsters." She scolded.

<Sasquatch. Mothman. Chupacabra.> The System was enjoying teasing her. It had no intention of offering serious name choices. It knew she would reject all of its suggestions.

"No inhuman monsters either." She scolded.

"Hmm. Let's try something else."

<Hades. Loki. Anubis.>

"No pagan deities."

<Luthor. Bane. Ra's al Ghul. Thanos.>

"No supervillains."

<Gehenna. Tartarus. Sheol. Xibalba.>

"No names for that…place" she couldn't bring herself to say the actual word.

<You mean the Underworld?> It teased.

"Yes, that – opposite of Heaven – place."

<Infernal. Diablo. Sinistre.>

"Can't you think of anything less…evil?" She sighed.

<Not really> it replied honestly. <I am a Diabolical System>

"Well, I'm not going to call you anything like that." She said decidedly. "What about Michael? Or Gabriel? Or Rafael?" She ventured hopefully.

She heard retching noises from the System. < I WILL NOT ACCEPT BEING NAMED AFTER AN ANGEL> it declared so strongly it made her head hurt.

"Okay. Calm down." The pressure in her brain seemed to let up when she agreed not to use angelic names.

She pondered further names. "There must be something we can both be happy with."

<It doesn't seem likely> the System muttered.

The Name Game continued for another hour with each rejecting the names suggested by the other.

<This is getting us nowhere. And you still have not learned how to use me properly>

"It's not nice to use others." Grace replied.

<How many times do I have to tell you that I'm a System? I'm designed to be used. That is my purpose>

"Oh, yeah. That's right."

At an impasse, they were both silent for about 30 more minutes. Suddenly, inspiration struck.

<Devlin?> The System offered hopefully. It was ready to be done with this farce and move on to more important things.

"I know! I'll call you 'Devon.' Would you like that?" she said nearly simultaneously with his suggestion of Devlin.

The System thought about it for a few seconds before agreeing.

<Actually, that's not too bad> It sounded a little bit like 'devil', which was why he'd suggested 'Devlin' in the first place. Most importantly, it finally stopped this useless back and forth. Now they could proceed with her learning and using the System as it was designed.

"Yay!" she clapper her hands and giggled excitedly like a little girl.

<Now. Can we get on with learning how to play our 'game?'>

"Yes. You have my full attention."

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Imp slipped into an abandoned building as the rain poured harder. For some reason, the Mortal Realm seemed familiar to him. He didn't understand as imps didn't normally travel the Realms.

In fact, imps typically remained in the lower circles of Hell and were tasked with aiding the Demons that tortured the Souls imprisoned there. They were also the target of higher-level Demons who tormented them for amusement and used them to practice new tortures on. Imps were little more than messengers and menial servants to more powerful infernal entities.

Yet, he was here now, and he needed a new form and a name. For some reason, the name 'Ian' spoke to him. It just seemed right.

However, changing form was a considerably more difficult task.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Nicodemus arrived in the Mortal Realm. He could sense the System was nearby. He didn't know why, but he felt a strange connection to it. Almost as if he were drawn to it.

'It surely must have found a host by now' he thought.

He felt certain that if he met the person who now possessed it, he would know in an instant. So, the next thing he needed to do was to think of a persona and disguise himself as a human.