The days went on slowly, uneventfully, but all the drama and tension seemed to settle for now.
Ari found himself spending his mornings as usual trying his best to not anger his mother while she spoke hatefully about something or opened up a normal topic leading to a completely normal conversation. It wasn't rare for them to just sit and talk, but the moment omegas cross her mind was the moment all the peacefulness goes away.
Every interaction with her left him tense. It has always been like that.
"Do you ever plan to move out?" She had asked out of the blue sipping on the coffee he had made her and he honestly was surprised that she didn't sound like anything except mildly curious. Like she really cared about what he wanted or planned.
"It did cross my mind." He admitted to her, but he made sure not to mention that it crossed his mind every single day he lived with her. The thought of living someplace without her sounded like heaven. "Do you think I should?"
His mother shrugged her shoulders. "If you want, you can."
"I don't think there's a place I can afford here."
"Not here." She snapped a little bit too quickly. "What's the point of moving out, then? Go somewhere else. Away from here."
Ari wondered what he should answer that with since his mother seemed to be annoyed. There's nowhere he could move to, he knows it. He did weigh his options countless times, and he always found himself stuck with his mother. He didn't know anywhere else to go, this had been his home ever since he was a child.
They did live somewhere else when he was an infant, but mentioning that would never end well. His mother was never fond of that place wherever it was. All he knows was that they moved out because of him. An illegitimate child, an accident she never wanted.
Not like it was his fault to begin with, it was all hers and he knows it, she did, too. That wasn't the real reason she could never tolerate him, though. It made him wonder if things were different, would she be more loving towards him?
He knew she cared about him to some extent since she still took him with her and raised him, but she still couldn't love him the way she should.
"You want me far away from you." He said sounding unaffected as he placed his plate right across from her. Despite the fact that his appetite was now gone, he still planned to eat his breakfast acting as if everything was okay and normal.
Without any words, his mother nodded her head confirming his realization.
"Well, I wouldn't mind moving away." He told her honestly, but he didn't know why he said it so shakily. It wasn't like he cared about the fact that she didn't want him around, and he thought about getting away constantly. It was very odd of him to be so affected. "The only problem is I don't have anywhere else."
"Hm." His mother nodded already knowing that. "If it is money, I can help."
Ari looked up at her curiously. "Why so suddenly?"
"I can't help but think about how useless you are." She told him unfeelingly as she took a large gulp of her coffee. Ari, who was used to such words, continued to eat silently. "I just want to forget that you exist, honestly. And I want people here to forget that you're my son."
Letting out a breath that sounded amused but was devoid of any amusement, Ari looked up at her with a wry smile. "Didn't know you were this ashamed of me."
"Just go away. It'll be good for the both of us." She told him standing him from her seat walking towards the front door. But before she left, she stopped on her way and looked back at him. "You never failed to disappoint."
Without waiting for a response, she left making his stare down at his food in silence.
While his morning could have been better, he decided that perhaps what he needed was a walk. Something to take his mind off of things. Off of everything.
Lately he'd been having so many unpleasant thoughts on top of memories he could live without. Nothing was going right, and the worst thing of all was the fact that there was nobody he could talk to. For the first time, Ari found himself truly alone and helpless to change that. It was also tragic how small their town was because it didn't take long for him to bump into Rowan who was happily chatting away with someone before she noticed him pass by.
If she had expected an apologetic or a sheepish smile from him so she could return it with a cold gaze, she was mistaken and was taken aback by the fact that it was Ari who passed by here without paying her any notice. He knew how she was whenever she was mad, but he really wasn't feeling like dealing with his friends right now – if they still consider him a friend.
After all, Ari had made it clear that he was a horrible terrible person to them.
If only he could bake at her house and tell her about everything…
God, he was sure he'd cry if he did.
"Ari," Her voice stopped him making him turn around to meet a cold look he expected. "Are you seriously pretending that nothing happened?"
"Nothing did." He replied flatly intending to continue on his way, but Rowan spoke again not allowing him to get away.
She was the last person he wanted to deal with.
"I just don't get it. That's not you." She said stepping closer to him sounding angry and frustrated. It was clear on her whole demeanor as she continued to speak to him while he blankly stared at her. "It's not like you to do this. To take Alec's mate away from him forever. What's going on with you?"
"What do you think?" He asked her in a tone that was almost challenging. Rowant felt like he was making her face something she didn't want to believe in the way he approached her, and her face contorted conflicted on what feeling to display. "Eli suddenly had his heat, what was I supposed to do? Just leave him there?"
"No, you're doing it on purpose." She accused him poking him with her index finger and his eyes widened at her words. "You know you two shouldn't be alone, yet you still keep finding ways to meet up in secret. It was easy to leave the room when he got his heat, but you just stayed there."
"And still nothing happened."
"Yet! I know you love him, but he's Alec's now. Shouldn't you respect that?"
Letting out a tired sigh, Ari looked away from her already tired of the same song repeating itself. Cassie was the one who left him with Eli, everyone knew that, yet everyone acts like he orchestrated this whole mess so he could finally get Eli for himself.
It didn't help that he was planning on meeting up with Eli in secret already, but not for that reason.
The sight of the forest caught his eye in the distance, and something suddenly occurred to him as he looked at his seething friend once more.
"Alec probably loathes me right now; he refuses to speak to me." He told her with his eyes wandering to the forest once more. Rowan followed his gaze clueless to what he was looking at or why, but he continued speaking snapping her attention away from it. "Are we still friends? Me and you."
Rowan didn't answer him right away as she considered everything before answering him reluctantly. "I don't like what you're doing. Not one bit, but yes. I guess we are."
Ari gave her a wan smile.
"I am happy about that. Just trust me, I would never hurt any of my friends." He told her eager to be alone away from everyone. Sometimes he really hated how easy it was to bump into everyone here. "I'll see you later."
Unconvinced by his words, Rowan stared at him as he walked away. "Later, sure."
His sensitive ears picked up on what she said and the tone she used, but he wasn't too bothered with it. The situation he was in was a very complicated one, but all he could think about was the forest and how he can escape everyone there. He'd been spending every day there just thinking or reading something until it became dark, but he loved every second of it.
Whenever he's there, he'd be truly alone and able to forget everything that's stressing him. Nothing would occupy his mind other than the chirping birds and the serenity of his surroundings. Oh, but it would be a lie to deny that there wasn't another reason. It was honestly the main reason, but he knew he was being ridiculous.
That night at the party never left his mind, and he never was brave enough to venture further into the forest to repeat it. He's just being a wishful fool, and it's very unlikely for anything to happen when he's this close to town. Besides, everything that happened so far was purely coincidental. Ari had no idea how to find him, but even if he did he would be too afraid to actually go look for him.
It wasn't like Constantine actually lived in the forest.
He's not always there.