The worst pickup line ever

"I would like to specifically tutor Guang Fang. I'll like this class to represent both academic excellence and character competence. As we saw today, I don't like our teachers to hate any of us. We want to contribute to society. And for most of us that would doubt whether I have this ability to change him, don't forget that I'm someone specially selected by the ancient world—and obviously, it wasn't because of my pretty face, else it would have been our Guang Fang." He ended his speech with a parodic display.

The class buzzed with a peal of mocking laughter; all eyes focused on me like a camera lens. I was in the sea of foreign gazes. Although I had anticipated this method of moral kidnapping, it still amazed me how this person presented this situation: he should be our student president.

Then came the self-righteous flak from the fickle detractors.

"Are you kidding me? Are you saying class B has no good student you could tutor other than a disposable oaf?"