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Pay 99 Yuan: Arranging A Mysterious Funeral For You

Su Chen transmigrated to a parallel world and inherited a funeral company. To his surprise, he awakened the God-tier Funeral System because of it. Regardless of whether a person wanted to leave behind a legendary tale in the world, or they wanted to create a mysterious and extraordinary history so that others would suspect that they were bigwigs, they could do so through Su Chen’s funeral company. [With only 99 Yuan, I will appear personally at your funeral with a black tuxedo. With a black umbrella in my hand, I will silently observe the entire funeral.] [With 10,000 Yuan, there will be 100 men in black at your funeral. A Maybach will drive through your funeral and an old man, dressed in a Chinese tunic suit, will bow and put flowers on your tombstone. He will then leave with a stern expression.] [With 100,000 Yuan, 3000 men in black will appear at your funeral with black umbrellas. It will be a gray and drizzly day. A military helicopter will circle the sky. Three old men dressed in black Chinese tunic suits, and two teary women, will pay their respects at your tombstone.] … [With 10 billion Yuan, your funeral will be broadcast to the public via Livestream. The heavens and the earth will shake while your coffin is carried to its final destination by nine dragons. The entire world will dim! All the world leaders will kneel and bow before your grave. Bizarre phenomena will appear in the sky while dark clouds will loom over the vast space. All the stars in the sky shall decorate your tombstone while the sun and the moon bid farewell to you.] [The company can fulfill all kinds of requests as long as you pay us enough.] [Place an order now and you will have a mysterious past immediately.]

Hotpot With Cilantro · Thành thị
Không đủ số lượng người đọc
40 Chs

Please, Suona!

Biên tập viên: EndlessFantasy Translation

At Huayi Town School, in the principal's office, Juan 'er and her husband were rummaging through the drawers, searching for anything valuable.

They found nothing except the 10,000 yuan in cash!

"Why isn't there even a bank card? Where did Auntie hide all her money?"

Juan 'er frowned and placed ten thousand dollars in cash into her pocket. Her gaze kept wandering around the office.

The man at the side also looked at the shabby office and spoke with some disdain,

"Look at this poor place. Even the principal's office is so shabby. There's an 80% chance that she, the principal, doesn't have much money! It's already not bad to have ten thousand dollars!"

"What do you know!? She has so many students under her command. Think about it carefully with that pig brain of yours. How can she not have any money!!? I heard from your third aunt's second daughter that a random tutor with a few hundred people in their cram school can earn quite a decent income. Think about it again. Your aunt has thousands of students under her command. Can't she get some profit out of anything she buys?"

Juan 'er pointed a finger at the man's head and said snappily.

She seemed to hate him for failing to live up to her expectations.

The man was about to flare up, but when he heard her words, he suddenly understood.

"Yeah, there must be money! Then I'll look for it carefully!"

"Stupid, but you really don't use your brain? Let's go. The money is definitely not here. who could put money in a place with so many people? Let's settle her funeral first. When we return to her place, we'll look for it carefully! In any case, my aunt doesn't have any relatives. Her inheritance is mine!"

Juan 'er said with a cold smile.

Her eyes were filled with greed.

If she had not heard that her aunt had become a principal here and had thousands of students under her command, she would not have bothered to come here to help with the funeral. It was full of dark energy that she did not want to deal with. If not for the money, who would be willing to come to such a poor place?

Since she had come, she couldn't go back empty-handed!

...

By the time Juan 'er and the man returned to the hospital, Xiao Ai had already taken care of the matters here.

The most important thing at the moment was to arrange a funeral.

"What do we do now? Are we going to cremate the body?"

Looking at the crowd, Juan 'er asked with tears in her eyes.

Her mind suddenly thought of her mother. Back then, when her own mother had left, she had not been so proactive.

Beside her, Xiao Ai walked up with red eyes and said to her,

"When in Rome, do as the Romans do. Huayi Town is full of burials. The villagers have already gone to help with the coffin. I'll have to trouble you to hire a Suona craftsman!"

"Hire a Suona craftsman?!"

Juan 'er frowned. When she heard that they were going to carry the coffin and hire a Suona craftsman, she immediately felt that it was very troublesome.

The man behind her immediately walked forward with a cold face.

"I remember that it costs a lot of money to hire a Suona craftsman, right?"

"Yes!"

Juan 'er also took advantage of the situation and said,

"In my opinion, we should just hurry up and arrange the funeral! Where did all these rules come from?"

"You!?"

Xiao Ai's expression changed, and she was so angry that she gritted her teeth!

How could there still be such a person? She was plain unreasonable and did not want to care about anything!

She still had the nerve to call her aunt?

When Xiao Ai grew furious, Juan 'er quickly added,

"People like my aunt usually like to keep a very low profile. It's already troublesome enough to bury her in the ground, and we're even thinking to hire a Suona craftsman. It's going to be so noisy and troublesome! Doesn't that make me unfilial? I only have one aunt. If you want to treat my aunt badly, I, Juan 'er, will be the first to disagree!"

Between her red lips and white teeth, the words she said were chilling.

Xiao Ai suppressed the anger in her heart and felt helpless.

She looked at the money in her hands:

"Since you are not willing to invite them, I will return the eight sets of Suona money that the villagers gathered together!"

At that moment, the two of them finally noticed the money in Xiao Ai's hands.

It seemed to be a few thousand yuan!

Juan 'er's eyes instantly lit up, and she hurriedly reached out to stop Xiao Ai:

"Sigh, forget it, forget it. Since it's a token of goodwill from the villagers, I'm sure aunt would be willing to accept it. I'll handle the invitation!"

As she spoke, her hand quickly snatched the money from Xiao Ai's hands.

Her attitude had turned around so rapidly that it caught people off guard.

Xiao Ai's expression froze, and the money in her hands had already been taken away.

It was unknown whether it was because of her filial piety or her greed for money.

Looking at their happy expressions, Xiao Ai grew suspicious and quickly reminded them:

"This is the price of eight Suona craftsmen. You can't take advantage of this. Be careful of retribution!"

"Hey! You little whelp, watch your words!"

Juan 'er's man was about to fly into a rage when he heard this!

He pointed his fingers at Xiao Ai.

Juan 'er, who had received the money, tugged at her husband and said with a smile,

"Don't worry, Principal Tang is my biological aunt! Leave the Suona business to us!"

With that, she dragged her husband to the town to hire a Suona craftsman.

After leaving the hospital, the two of them muttered on the road.

"Eight Suona, that's a big scene! My mother didn't even get eight when she left. It's expensive and troublesome! Isn't it a waste to spend so much money?"

Juan 'er held the money and was a little reluctant to part with it.

It was difficult to put the money in her pocket, but it was easy to get it out.

The man beside her also nodded:

"Why don't we give her four sets instead? Don't waste the rest of the money. Take the change!"

"Hmph, now you're using your brains!"

Juan 'er snorted coldly.

After hesitating for a moment, she finally put the money in her pocket.

She prepared to ask the Suona craftsman about the price first.

If eight sets were really too expensive, she would give her aunt four sets of Suona!

In the town, there was a relatively famous Li family. They were Suona craftsmen who specialized in their craft.

The two of them casually inquired and learned the location of the Li family.

They hurriedly went to invite the Suona craftsmen of the Li family.

...

It was rare for Huayi Town to divert from their established norm. Regardless of it being a wedding or celebration, the organizer had to invite a Suona craftsman to play two parts before the event officially started.

If there was no Suona craftsman, the red and white wedding would appear to be too cold and dreary.

The guests would feel as if something was missing

Therefore, Suona craftsmen were highly regarded in the community.

They required nothing less than a personal visit to their home for an invitation!

They commonly asked for four sets of Suona.

Those who came from better families asked for eight sets.

In addition to the four Suona, one played the erhu, one played the Sheng, one played the flute, and one played the drums.

It was a big scene, and the tune was difficult to play, so the price was naturally high.

The so-called Suona went as for as high as ten thousand taels of gold, and for good reason!

However, some songs had been lost over time.

It was said that sixty or seventy years ago, a blind man in the town knew one such song.

Not many in town knew of this song.

Perhaps not a single person in the country was capable of playing it

And that song was called -- A hundred birds paying homage to the Phoenix!