Chapter One

"Hey goose," I said to my sister, Olivia, ruffling her blonde mop of short, curly hair. "Whatcha doin'?" I asked casually, my eyes roaming over her school book and homework.

"Trig, but I can't figure out this problem. I might just have to look it up and see how it's done," she replied, sounding defeated. I rolled my eyes. I wasn't even in trigonometry yet, and she was two years younger than me. I usually tried to help her with her homework, but I was out of my depth here.

"You could wait until Ma gets home from work, I'm sure she can help with it," I suggested. Ma was an accountant, her second job after being a gynecologist. There wasn't much use for vagina doctors in a town of a thousand people, at least until after the summer and all the tourists have gone home. Then suddenly she's overwhelmed with young women who've had one too many summertime flings.

"If I wait 'til Rachel gets home I'll be sitting here all night. I'll just look it up on my phone." Olivia and Ma always fight, and for some reason Olivia seemed keen on calling Ma by her first name. I sighed and turned back towards the kitchen.

Olivia perked up almost immediately. "What's for dinner?" she inquired, following me with hungry eyes.

"A fancy feast of one hundred roast turkeys and mashed potatoes with all the fixings," I said sarcastically, before adding, "Spaghetti. With garlic bread." she made a sound that sounded like approval and turned to her phone, still looking perplexed. I went to work on the noodles and sauce, while putting the toast in the oven. Halfway through, Olivia was standing right behind me, looking over my shoulder.

"Did you figure out your problem?" I asked, hinting with my eyes at her obvious proximity.

"No, but it's not due until Wednesday. I'll ask Mr. Berkley about it tomorrow," she said, eyeing the sauce, "That smells amazing."

"Get back before I whack you with this spoon! It'll be the death of you, Olivia Dickenson!!" I mockingly yelled, waving the spoon in front of her. She snuck a strand of almost cooked spaghetti and ran around me, blowing on her burning finger and the noodle. "Oh no you don't!" I yelled, and started to chase her out of the kitchen. She jogged away and stuck the end of the noodle in her mouth, finishing with an audible slurp. "Get back to your homework piggy," I laughed as I pushed her back towards the table, and turned back to the kitchen. We had a small kitchen, but it was a small house. Two bedrooms, one constantly cluttered bathroom.

The IRS went after dad and his boss, Anita, for embezzling money through properties. He was an architect who worked for the 'building and development of this small town,' as he often put it. The IRS took the car and our first house, causing us to move into a smaller, more practical hovel. I was taking the garlic bread out of the oven and placing it on plates with spaghetti and forks, when I heard the front door open. I automatically grabbed another plate and fork, and was setting up the third plate when Ma entered the kitchen.

"Smells good Lenna," Ma said, looking appraisingly over the lack of mess and plates of food.

"Thanks Ma," I said, heading towards the table with the two plates for Olivia and I. "How was work today? Randy giving you any more trouble?" Randy was Ma's boss, ever since dad… left… he was the fly and Ma was the honey. Once in a while, when I'd come down for a midnight snack, Ma would be at the table drinking wine. The more she drank the more she talked, and often told me about how Randy liked to slap her ass or drop something so she'd have to bend down and pick it up, exposing her cleavage. I've met Randy only twice, but he was a fat, bald man with a choppy moustache that looked straight out of the '70s, and I've always gotten a creepy vibe from him, like the closer I got the more I wanted to hide.

"Same old same old," she replied, shrugging. "How was everyone's day?" she asked, quickly changing the subject.

"Bethany's having a pool party this weekend. She invited me but I don't think I'm gonna go. Kali wants to have a girl's night Friday, so we're gonna get our nails done and go to the movies," I lied lightly about being invited and our scheduled activities, but I've gotten so good at lying lately it's been scaring me. Ma nodded, approving my plans. If she did pick up on my lying, she didn't say anything. I know that she knows I'm hiding something from her, but if she knew what it was I don't think she would allow me anywhere for even five minutes. I think she's so wrapped up in her own problems she doesn't want to know, and that's perfectly fine to me.

"Mine was good. Michael B asked me to the spring dance. He's decent looking enough, so I think I'll go with him. Besides, everyone else in my friend group found dates already, so if Micheal hadn't asked me I probably wouldn't have gone," Olivia explained, lightly hiding her disgust when she said Michael's name. She must have someone else she wanted to ask, but now it was too late. I ignored her facial expressions for her sake, she didn't really want to talk about boys with Ma. I'll ask her about it later.

"Ooooooooooohhh Olivia and Michael sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S--" Olivia punched my arm hard, cutting me off in the middle of my song. "Ouch you nerd," I said, flinging a strand of saucy spaghetti at her. It landed in her hair and she picked it up and put it defiantly in her mouth. "Ew, gross!" I laughed.

"Honey you know even if Michael B didn't ask you you could've gone with your friends anyway. I'm sure they'd understand," Ma said, using her best 'supportive' voice.

"Yeah but the rest of the school wouldn't," Olivia mumbled. This was also something I was going to have to ask her about later, too.

After dinner, I was cleaning up the dishes when Ma came up and grabbed a rag. As she was drying, she started to tell me about an upcoming office party. "Most of the parents are bringing their kids, and since it's the same night as the freshman dance, I was wondering if you'd want to come with me," she said, but what she was really saying was, 'I'm worried about you and I want to keep a closer eye on you.'

"Sure Ma, I'd love to go," I replied, finishing up the dishes and draining the water.

"So I know that Olivia has a boy interest now, but how's your love life looking, Oleanna?" let me translate - 'Do I have to worry about you getting pregnant or getting an STD?'

"Ma you know I've never had much interest in dating," I replied. She didn't need to know how much I didn't want to date, or why, but that was a conversation for another time. "Alrighty Ma I'm gonna head to bed. Get some sleep okay?" I said, noticing the circles under her eyes growing darker by day. I turned and headed for the stairs. Olivia was already in our shared bedroom, she was in pajamas with her retainer in and pigtail braids in her hair. "Hey dork," I said, noticing her appearance.

"Shut up," she said, throwing a pillow at my face.

"So it's war, then," I said sarcastically, and started pummeling her with pillows. I didn't realize how much noise we'd been making until Ma knocked at the door and came in, telling us both to go to bed. I got ready and laid under my covers, and once all of the lights were off I asked Olivia about Michael and school.

"Michael's… nice. But I like Jacob. I thought he liked me too, but he asked Emily to the dance. And I feel like my friends keep slowly pushing me away, and the other day some other girls in my class were laughing and pointing at me and I don't know why." Emily was her best friend, that must really suck. I don't know why, but it's easier to talk about serious stuff when all the lights are out and we're both staring at the ceiling.

"Livvy. Girls are brutal creatures from hell that are so caught up in jealousy and narcissism that they decide to take their feelings of insecurity and aim it at other girls. It's a vicious cycle. That's why I only hang out with Kali. She knows what it's like to be hurt by girls and so do I. As for the boy situation, if this Jacob doesn't see how wonderful you are, he doesn't deserve you. Michael seems like a good kid, maybe you'll get over this Jacob kid by giving Michael a chance," I explained, hoping she wouldn't get too caught up with these distractions. She was practically the only one left in our family with a real future. Ma was stuck in two dead end jobs with nowhere to go, and I wasn't the best student, or kid for that matter. Livvy was the only one with real prospects. She was on track to graduate early, she had almost all of her credits and was taking online college courses. If she wanted to she could graduate by the end of her sophomore year. She was constantly looking up colleges and had a dream of going to Yale and graduating with a degree in applied physics. By the time she got there, I'm sure she'll have gotten almost half of the degree done. She'll be working in a research firm by the time she's seventeen.

"Thanks Lenna. I'm gonna go to sleep now, goodnight," she said, still stuck in her thoughts.

"Night."