8. Love Is A Battlefield

Here we go guys!I can't believe this, almost 100 followers! I'm over the freaking moon!Thank you, thank you, thank you! Here's your playlist for this chapter:

1)Kool and the Gang – Jungle Boogie2) [Stranger Things 2] Outside the Realm - Big Giant Circles feat. Ashly Burch & Malukah (HINT: Tina's alone scene in the Byers house)3) Rick Springfield - Jessie's Girl4) Pat Benatar - Love is a Battlefield

As always, don't forget to let me know what you think! With Halloween around the corner in this story, we're a couple of chapters away from canon and that's… well, that's not going to go well for Tina, let me tell you that.

I hope you enjoy the chapter! Thank you for reading! Love ya! :)

The plan was simple; lunch at their place and then taking the kids to my place. Perfect plan, without a chance of something going wrong. No, not with my luck. Despite the day being sunny and warm, by the time I was halfway to the Byers house, with another… 15 minutes of walking before me and 15 minutes of walking behind me, the sky had opened up and I was soaking wet within seconds.

I couldn't go back now, it would be stupid. I could just… keep on walking and cursing.

It does catch me by surprise when I see Jonathan's Ford driving my way; I thought to wave at him or something but I don't, as he turns the car around. I already start to think that I've lost him but he starts driving in reverse. I start laughing because at this point, what the hell am I supposed to do?

The car stops right next to me but I don't see Will from all the rain, not until he opens the window. "We thought you needed a rescue." He beams up at me.

"Yeah, you were right about that," I laugh as he climbs into the backseat and I hop into the car, probably ruin Jonathan's seats; I'm soaking. I'm not getting away from a flue, not after this one. "Thanks guys."

"Don't mention it," Jonathan shakes his head as he starts driving. "Sorry it took us this long."

"Nah, I'm just glad you found me, I could have taken a different road," I mumble. I couldn't have, not really. I always take this road, whether it's when Jonathan drives me or when I'm walking. They knew that. "What the hell is wrong with this weather? It was so sunny just… minutes ago!"

"Life isn't always fair," Will mumbles from the backseat, causing both Jonathan and I to laugh; well, isn't that one true. "Guys, what's this song?"

"Oh, my sweet child, this is "Jungle Boogie" by 'Kool and the Gang', the best song ever," I laugh, turning around to see Will's reaction to this. He seems to like the song, even nodding his head to the rhythm. "You wouldn't know that with your 'Clash' loving brother, would you?"

"Hey, what's wrong with 'The Clash'?" Jonathan gets all defensive.

"Absolutely nothing," I lift my hands up. "I'm just saying, you should let Will develop his own tastes. As an older brother, your job is to open the door of amazingly good music to him and then let him decide what his thing is and what's not."

"Are you trying to say that I'm not doing a good job?" Jonathan laughs.

"Guys, please…"

"No, you're doing a great job but you're… you're doing a limited job. And I think Will needs to be exposed to a more… versatile mix. You know, maybe someone around is more knowledgeable than you are, at least when it comes to music." I say; I'm not even sure how much of it is a joke or not. At least he's smiling.

"So you want to be the one that gets to musically educate my brother?" he laughs.

"All I'm saying is, guy is missing out on some good funk," I shrug. "It's your call Byers."

"Alright, oh, knowledgeable master," he rolls his eyes. "Expose him to funk and whatever else."

"Thank you," I laugh. "Kid, we're going to listen to Jackson tomorrow."

"As long as you two don't argue about it."

"Oh honey, look at you!" Joyce sighs when I walk into her house and immediately make a small pond in the hallway; water is still dripping from me. "Jonathan, find her something to wear, I'll bring the blow-dryer." She mumbles, already running around the house in the search of it. Will immediately runs off to join his friends down in his room; god knows what they are up to. I follow Jonathan into his room and wait as he rummages around his closet in search for my improvised outfit.

"Here, try this," he throws me a piece of clothing which I manage to catch. "I'm going to look if mom has some old jeans or sweatpants, mine would be too big on you."

"Thanks," I smile at him as he walks out of the room. And here I am, about to wear his clothes again. The universe must be giving me a middle finger. With a sigh, I take off my shirt and throw it on his bed; he gave me a sweater, which is a good call, seeing as I'm freezing. I can't wear it. I just… can't.

I sit down on his bed and sigh, letting the doubt take over me again. I've been trying to act as if it's all okay and while I'm one hell of an actor… that's the problem, isn't it? I'm acting. It's all one big act, me trying to pretend like things are the same as they were before. And Jonathan, he's acting too. And he's not as good at it as I am. Looking at his sweater in my hands, I wonder for how long we'll be able to keep it up. And if we… if we can't keep it up, then what? What do we do then? Do we go back to not talking?

"I found the jeans," I haven't realized that he had returned from the room and I throw that sweater over my head in the speed of light; at least I wasn't facing him, wearing just my bra and drenched jeans. "And the blow drier's in the bathroom. I'll leave you to it." he mumbles and I hear the door close.

Nope, I'm not going to cry. I'm done with crying about stupid things. I don't need it to be more than it is now. This is good. It's not as good as it once was but it is good. It definitely can't get any better. I won't cry about it and I sure as hell won't let him see me cry about it.

Yeah, just because I don't want to cry doesn't mean that I won't cry. A couple of tears fell down my cheeks as I was drying my hair, the blow drier pushing the traces of cologne from his sweater right into my nose. It was clean but it still smelled like him. Fuck, I really need to get my act together.

"Those jeans look better on you than they have ever looked on me!" Joyce laughs when she sees me as I join them at the table; all of them were waiting for me before they've decided to dig into the lunch. "Keep them, I don't even know if I fit in them anymore."

"You sure?" I ask and she just nods her head. "I might. They're cool. Vintage."

"Oh Jesus, I guess that makes me vintage too." Joyce chuckles, looking down at her plate. I don't know what's wrong with us today but we all seem a bit off. It's surprisingly quiet, even with 4 kids. I guess that today just isn't our day. I don't know what excuse they have but… hell, even Jonathan is very quiet.

"Tina, how are we gonna go back home from your place?" Dustin speaks up, breaking the silence. "We don't have our bikes with us. Jonathan will drive us there, but what about later?" he asks.

"I could wait and drive you back home?" Jonathan offers. "I don't have to work today."

"No, it's not a problem," I smile and shake my head. "I'll borrow Steve's or mom's car and I'll drop them off. I'm not going to make you run around in this kind of weather, will I?"

"I don't know, it looks like it's clearing up." Lucas comments while leaning over to look at the window.

"Well, you know what they say," Joyce beams up. "Sunshine comes after every storm."

Yeah, sunshine comes after every storm, my ass.

"I think it looks good!" Will breaks the very, very uncomfortable silence.

Dustin is parading the costume before us and it has to be the worst Chewbacca costume in the history of Chewbacca costumes. And no one has the heart to say it out loud, not with all the effort that went into it. I can even see it on Mom's face; she knows it's not good enough but she did as best as she could. Will did try to reassure us all but that was the worst executed lie I was ever witness to; I need to teach that kid how to lie. He's never going to make it if what he just said was his best shop.

"I like it!" Dustin announces proudly. Now, he can lie.

"It's… totally realistic." Lucas confirms. Hmm, that one can pass as a solid lie.

"Everyone will know you're Chewbacca." Mike nods his head eagerly; his words aren't compelling but the look on his face is; a bystander would think that he's super excited about the whole costume thing.

"Wow, you're awfully nice for a bunch of 12-year-olds," Steve makes us all jump up, as we didn't even know he was in the house. But no, he's leaning on the living room door, looking at the scene before him. "If he's supposed to be Chewbacca, the costume is awful."

I'm going to make him pay for it. Not because he pointed out the obvious, hell no; you can see from a plane that the costume is a disaster! I'm going to kill him from saying that in front of mom, who had spent hours working on the costume to help me and to make sure Dustin's happy.

"Hey!" Dustin snaps; I look at him in surprise. He even looks feisty. "Don't insult my costume! Tina and Mrs. Harrington put in a lot of hard work into it!"

I have never seen anyone other than me act towards my brother in that way. I'm impressed.

"I'm not insulting their work," Steve shrugs. "I'm just pointing out that you don't look like Chewbacca."

"Steve's right," I sigh, not wanting to be witness of four 12-year-olds physically attacking my brother, even if that would be one hell of a sight. "We did the best we could but it's not good enough. I can't let you wear that kid," I mumble. I didn't want to say it like that, not in front of mom, but… no. Dustin won't be able to pull it off, no matter how cute he is. "I promised to buy you a costume if I screw it up and I'm sticking to my promise."

"No way," Dustin shakes his head. "No. I'd rather wear a shitty Chewbacca costume that you made than some store bought… poor replacement."

"Dustin, that is very sweet of you to say," mom speaks up to rescue the situation. "Although I must remind you not to use the language you've probably managed to pick up from my daughter," she gives me a pointed look. Of course it's my fault that 12-year-olds curse! Who else could it be? "But Steve and Tina are… right. You don't look like Chebacka. I think you should let Tina fix this."

"I hope you know that I won't forgive myself for this if you don't let me fix it." I add; I'm not even joking. Guilt works wonders on me. It would eat me out alive, to know that this poor boy has his Halloween night ruined because I meddled into something that was none of my business to begin with. I wouldn't forgive myself for it. Not to mention that I've been through middle school; that shit can be hard. If kids make fun of his costume… nah, I'm not having it. "Who's gonna drive, me or you?" I turn to my brother.

"What?"

"I'm taking them to the mall," I elaborate. "Are you going to take us there or are you going to borrow me your car?" I ask. He gives me a weird look before throwing me his keys. I manage to catch them, despite not having good reflexes at all. "Dusting, get out of that. The rest of you, get into the car and wait for me." I say, giving Lucas the car keys. They listen to me at once; it takes Dustin just a couple of seconds to get out of the costume and moments later, they're all outside.

"Tina," mom walks over to me. "You can't do that. You can't bring all four of them and buy just one costume. It's not fair to the rest of the boys, no matter what you have promised Dustin."

"I know," I nod my head, confusing her even more. "That's why I'm going to pay for all of their costumes."

"There goes your car money." Steve points out.

"I know and I'm doing it."

I'm not going to spend my whole savings; I'm just going to have to work for a little longer than I was originally hoping for. It's not… it's not a choice. I'm not letting those Dustin go with a shitty costume and I'm not going to make the rest feel left out. Besides… I don't know about the financial situation of Lucas, Dustin and Mike's families but I know that Joyce isn't doing too well at the moment; both she and Jonathan are working whenever they can.

Kids shouldn't notice shit like that. My family never had money problems, save for that one time when Dad's firm was in a crisis for a couple of months; not much had changed back then but it was enough for me to notice. It's bad, it sucks and no one can avoid it. But kids should be left out of that.

I don't have mouths to feed and all of their parents do. I'm not going to pay for their college tuition; I'm just buying them costumes! I'll survive, they'll have the coolest costumes ever and maybe, just maybe, this will go down as the best Halloween of their lives. And their parents won't have to struggle to pay for it, or live with the guilt of not giving them what they had wanted for this one night of the year.

"Tina, that's… that's a lovely thing to do." Mom tells me and despite her poker face, I can see a hint of pride there, a look that says 'despite her cursing, I did raise her well'.

"An angel will grow wings."

I don't want to be thanked or praised for it. I'm just doing it and that's it. I'm not expecting gratitude from anyone. If I manage to make those kids smile, that'll be good enough for me.

"Fill the tank!" Steve yells after me as I walk out of the house.

"I always do, asshole!" I yell, jumping into his car; I can see in the review mirror that all four of the boys look excited and a little bit confused. "Buckle up."

"Where are we going?" Will asks me.

"We're going costume shopping," I say; I thought that one was pretty obvious. Ugh, kids. "And guess what? All four of you are getting costumes."

Yup, to see four faces beam up… fuck the car money. I'll get it somehow.

"Why wouldn't you be Jabba the Hutt?"

"Because no!" Mike yells. "No one in their right mind would want to be Jabba the Hutt!"

"Why not?" Dustin insists.

"Guys, easy," I say as we walk towards the store; I did not consider how shopping with four boys would end up being a tiring expedition, and we haven't even started. "There are plenty of characters to choose from. Chewbacca's the only one that's taken. Just don't fight over who gets to be who, alright?"

Oh, wishful thinking. Five minutes into the costume shopping, Dustin was sitting next to me, with a Chewbacca costume in his hands, Will on my other side, all three of us watching as Lucas and Mike bickered about which one will get to be Luke. I definitely should have seen this one coming.

"Guys… guys… guys," I try, but all they do is ignore me. "Guys!" I snap, finally getting their attention. "You need to chill and you need to make a decision."

"No, this is a democracy," Lucas shakes his head. "It's not going to be fair either way, one of us will have to pay for it and no one is going to back down." He tells me, with Mike nodding. Funny, how easily they can agree on that but not on which one of them is going to be Luke fucking Skywalker.

"Alright, here's what we're going to do," I sigh, standing up. I'm going to use the parenting technique I have learned from my dad, called 'the accident'. "I'm going to turn around and I'm going to close my eyes. Dustin will be my witness that my eyes weren't open. The two of you will stand next to each other, one to the left and the other one to the right. Feel free to mix it up. Will is going to call out "stop" and you will stop. He will be your witness that you haven't moved. I'm going to say "left" or "right", and whoever's on the side I chose, he'll be Luke Skywalker. That's how democracy works; let others choose."

"That's a good idea guys." Dustin and Will both nod their heads.

"Fine," Mike agrees. "But no peaking!"

"Yeah, like I don't know any better," I roll my eyes and turn around. I close them and I listen on as the two of them… run around each other or something. Do parents feel like complete idiots all the time? I can see that being the case but then again, most parents don't have to deal with 4 boys of the same age at the same time. "How long are we going to do this?" I sigh; it's already taking them too long.

"Stop!" Will calls out.

"Good. Left," I respond, turning around to see Lucas beaming, as he's the chosen one. I've got to hand it to Mike, he took his defeat like a champ, even shaking Lucas's hand, as if he had won some sort of competition. "Alright, now we just need to find you a costume."

"And you." Will adds.

"Nah, I'm good," I smile, reaching out for one of the Leia outfits. "See? Not much of a choice for a girl, right ? Now, the two of you. Will, who do you want to be?" I ask him.

"Darth Vader."

"Are you sure about that?" I ask him. How many kids want to be the bad guy?

"Yes," he laughs. "He's a bad guy but he's cool. It would be cool to be a bit dark." He shrugs.

"Suit yourself," I laugh. "Go, pick it out. We'll brainstorm for Mike's costume," I instruct him and he runs away, looking for the Darth Vader masks. I'll probably have to sell my kidney to get a car but hey, that angel sure as hell is going to get its wings. "Now, you," I frown at Mike. "Han Solo?" I suggest.

"No, no way," he laughs. "Han and Leia like each other and you're going to be Leia."

"Mike, you're not going to be my date for the party," I roll my eyes at his antics. "There's going to be… like 50 Leias in Hawkins. Don't let that stop you from being Han Solo if you want to be Han Solo."

"Nope. No Han. Not for me."

"Fine? Obi Wan Kenobi?" I offer, only for him to shake his head. "R2D2?" I ask and he declines again.

"What about Yoda?" Lucas suggests.

"The height works." Dustin adds and I have to bite my lip to stop myself from laughing.

"Yeah, I can work with Yoda."

"Perfect. Now pick out your sizes and let's get out of here before I lose my shit."

I think I might have enough cash for the car before I graduate. If all goes by plan. Maybe I can try to work five days a week, instead of four? I guess I could make that work.

"Thanks for the costume Tina!" Mike yells out as he closes the door behind him.

"Well bud, it's just you and me," I smile in the rearview mirror to Will, who has a big grin plastered on his face. "What do you say, should we start that music education course?"

"Sure."

It always bugged me how Jonathan lives far from the center of town; far from me, far from everything else. But now, with a solid 20 minute drive, I had a chance to spend time with Will and teach him some good music. I all but wished that I can have a bit more time with him for this.

"So? What's the call on Rick Springfield?" I ask; he's nodding his head in the rhythm of the song, holding tightly onto his Darth Vader mask.

"Do you like this song?" he asks me.

"Yeah, I guess I do."

"And Jonathan? Does he like it?"

"I think he does," I chuckle. "I don't think he'd ever admit to it though. It's a guilty pleasure for both."

"A guilty pleasure?" Will asks in confusion.

"A guilty pleasure song is a song that you really like, but… you don't want to admit to it. Like, you listen to it when no one is around and you play it as loud as you can, dancing around your room like crazy."

"I've seen Jonathan do that," Will laughs. "Mom too."

"We all do it," I nod my head. "You'll do it too, when you learn which music you like and don't like. Rick Springfield is cool, but there's better stuff. However, that's for me to inform you and you to decide. Just because Jonathan likes Clash doesn't mean you have to like Clash too. Just because I scream to "Jessie's Girl" doesn't mean it should be your favorite too."

"But what if I like everything?" Will asks me, dead serious. "I mean, I like the music Jonathan plays. I like the music you listen to. Can I like everything?"

"Of course you can," I chuckle. "That's the best thing ever. You can sing along, dance to everything. Ah, see, this is a good song," I smile and I turn up the volume. "Pat Benatar is amazing!" I yell over the music. In a matter of moments, I start singing along to the song. I can hear Will laughing behind me but that's good. If he sees what music can do to you, he will appreciate it. He doesn't have to like Pat Benatar, as long as he finds a song he can act silly to, kind of like I am doing now.

"Tina, is love really a battlefield?" he asks.

The smart thing would be to tell him that Pat makes it out to be a bit more difficult than it actually is. Then again, I'm still wearing a sweater that belongs to a boy I made out with, only to have him pretend like it had never happened. You can't really understand it until it happens to you. I don't have to say that to the kid but I can't lie to him either; he'd remember it. I'm fairly certain he would remember me reassuring him the first time he gets his heart broken. Smelling Jonathan's cologne on me isn't helping.

"Yup, it kind of is," I nod my head, deciding to go with a mild version of the truth. "It sucks."

"Jonathan told me that love hurts."

Well, isn't that the truth?!

"Yeah, it does."

Now I'm glad we don't get more than 20 minutes. I park the car in their driveway before Will gets to ask me another awkward question. He runs out of the car before I even get a chance to open the door; he runs straight into the house with his Darth mask and as I walk into the house, I can hear him telling Joyce how I was a super cool friend and how I got them all costumes.

"Oh, Tina," Joyce sighs when she notices me on the front door. "You shouldn't have done that."

"Yeah but I wanted to." I shrug. I am ready for her hug and I smile when she squeezes me a bit too tight. She knows that I know. With the bills she has to pay, she wouldn't be able to buy that mask for Will and she knows that's one of the reasons I've decided to buy it for him. But I really don't want to be praised for that, I already feel uncomfortable as it is.

"Thank you." she mumbles as she slowly pulls away from the hug.

"Don't worry about it," I chuckle. "I've got a pair of cool vintage jeans in exchange, haven't I?"

"Please don't call them vintage," she laughs. "Do you want to stay for dinner?"

"No, I told mom I'd be back as soon as I drop them off. I'm just going to take my clothes and give the sweater back to Jonathan," I explain as I make my way through the hallway. "Easy!" I warn Will as he runs out of Jonathan's room and into his own, carrying that Vader mask as if it was golden. I am still laughing when I walk into Jonathan's room.

"You bought them all costumes?" he asks with an amused look on his face. Hmmm, amused or confused? I can't tell. With him, it really is a guessing game.

"What can I say, I felt like their fairy godmother." I shrug as I walk over to the radiator beneath the window, where my T shirt was sprawled out. I feel it up; yup, it's dry.

"If it's still wet, you can keep the sweater," Jonathan offers. "Or if you don't have a jacket."

"I don't have it but I took Steve's car," I sigh as I open the closet door and stand behind it; he can't see me from where he's sitting and I really don't feel like running around the house, acting like some sort of prude; I'll hardly be naked and we already know he's not interested in watching. "It was worth it, you know. Seeing the look on their faces when they realized that they'll have mega cool Halloween costumes."

"I get that but… you always talk about how you can't wait to have your own car."

"Oh, that's still the truth," I laugh as I close the closet door and start folding up his sweater. "I can't wait for the day to come when I'll have my own car and quit that fucking job in that fucking store," I sigh, knowing that day won't come for a while. "But I've only postponed it for like a month or so. I'll live and they'll have great costumes. Speaking of Halloween, are you still up for that party at Melissa's?"

"I am but…"

"Jonathan, now what?" I sigh. Every single time, whenever there's a party, he either tries to find an excuse or he successfully finds it. I haven't managed to drag him out to a single one. The only time he was invested into it was when he wanted to go to the dance and that one did not end well.

"I have to take Will trick-or-treating," he shrugs. "It's kind of like our thing. And this year, I'm the older siblings that takes care of the group. It was Nancy last year and I'm pretty sure that this year, she's going to be at Melissa's with your brother."

"No one's asking you to ditch Will," I roll my eyes. "Hell, if you don't feel like doing it, I'll do it. But show up at the party later. Her parents are out of town, free booze… why the fuck not?" I shrug.

"I'd rather not show up there without you, seeing as I wasn't actually invited." He points out.

"Fine, then I'll be here earlier, we'll take them trick-or-treating and we'll go to the party when we drop them off home. The world will still keep spinning and you'll be out of your comfort zone," I laugh as I throw the sweater to him, despite folding it just moments ago. "And think of a costume, Byers. You're not passing as the guy who hates parties anymore."

"Lunch break in the dark room?"

"Of course, Byers!" I yell as I walk out of his room.

"Your car is in one piece, the tank is full, the kids will have great costumes and I will work for a month or two longer." I announce as I throw Steve the car keys and take my place at the dinner table. Again, it's him, mom and me. Dad's too busy working, just like he always is.

I don't think I'd be surprised if we ever found out that he's staying longer in the office on purpose. If I didn't know how uninterested he was in literally everything, I'd think he was cheating on mom but dad… he wouldn't even have the will to do that. Work, food, business trips, newspapers, basketball and an occasional, obligatory chat with his family; that's dad in a nutshell.

"I don't think you will," mom tells me as she puts pees on my plate. Steve and I exchange a look. "I wasn't supposed to say anything, but since you've turned 16, I've been bugging your father to finally get you a car. You'll have one by Christmas." She adds with a smile.

"I'll believe it when I see it," I laugh. "And if I see it, I'll be sure to thank you."

"So he's back to buying love and affection, is he?" Steve asks. Well, I share his opinions. I would love to be ecstatic and grateful, but for one, I don't believe it will actually happen and two, if it does happen, it's literally what Steve called it: buying love and affection.

"Steven!"

"Hey Steve, come on," I laugh. "Sure, we don't get love, attention, or anything like that but at least I'll have a car, right?"

"Kids, don't…"

"Mom, you don't," Steve stops her. "We're no longer kids. You don't have to defend him, not when we can see it for ourselves. Don't waste your words, or your time."

Just another dinner in the Harrington household where the silence says more than words ever could.

I won't become my mother. Small town, working husband and two kids only one year apart in age… that's not going to be me. I'll never let a man treat me like father treats her. I'll never…

Based on my role models and my only experience with any kind of affection backfiring on me, maybe it would be better if I stay single for life? Become one of those women everyone frowns at, one of those "free spirits" as the elders call them in disapproval.

Hell, that's better than what mom has. She only has Steve and me and let's face, we aren't much.

1)Kool and the Gang – Jungle Boogie (drive with Jonathan, Tina and Will)

2) [Stranger Things 2] Outside the Realm - Big Giant Circles feat. Ashly Burch & Malukah (Tina changing, moment with Jonathan, crying)

3) Rick Springfield - Jessie's Girl (drive with Will)

4) Pat Benatar - Love is a Battlefield (drive with Will)