Chapter 51

"I'm regretting all my life choices right now," I grumbled to myself as I looked between the scrolls and books that laid before me. All of them detailing as much as people could about how to create a Genjutsu that did something specific. From how moving one's chakra one way or the other with certain hand seals would help with this or that to what illusions could be created in certain ways and which had to be made another way.

"Don't be dramatic, brat," Anko said from the side where she was playing something with Shirakumo. "Although, if you can't make it, I would admit it quickly. They'll be less angry that way."

"Way to alleviate the pressure, Anko," I grumbled, my eyes still scanning the texts in front of me to wring as much information as I could from them. I would need it, apparently. "I thought this would be like Elemental Jutsu creation, dammit. Those at least followed several of the same principles of regular Jutsu creation. But noooo, it had to be completely different. I'm trying to cram in the basics together with the advanced stuff in the same amount of time I estimated for just the latter."

"As I said-"

"I'm still making it," I interrupted, as a grin formed on my face. And the smile had nothing happy about it, that I can guarantee. "I already wanted to make that thing a Genjutsu anyway. And with several Kage's eyes on me? It's my moment to shine. I'll make this happen."

"Well, I, myself, can't wait to see what all this is about, honestly," She commented and I froze. Did she expect me to put the Genjutsu on her once it was done? Because I would refuse if that was the case. The Void was exclusively reserved for enemies. Orochimaru levels of enemies, if I had any say in the matter. It was just… I still had nightmares, three years after the fact. "Wow, that bad, huh?" My sensei pointed out, obviously having picked up on how I felt on the matter. "Guess I'll have to see what it does to whoever they want to cast it on."

I blinked and turned to her, narrowing my eyes. As I did so, she smirked at me. 'So, she does know what this is for… but can't tell me? Then why even make it known...' I shook my head and focused back on the texts. 'Doesn't matter. Nothing matters but making this Genjutsu exist,' I told myself.

This was my way to try and avoid the Crush. I had thought I had no power in the matter, that I would have to just… make the best of that fucked up situation when it happened. Either that, or hope that the changes I had brought an actual, active way to try and help with that, maybe even stop it altogether.

I would be damned if I didn't take the chance because it was difficult.

'That said,' I thought to myself wryly. 'I think after this and the other project I'll lay off Jutsu creation for a while. This is already a headache, I don't want to know how burned out I'll be when I'm done.'

My eyes then trailed to the side.

[Chakra Points: 900/900]

'Cursed Seal: First Stage,' I activated and couldn't help but let out a groan. Instantly, I felt ten eyes on me, two from my teacher and eight from my summon. I steadfastly ignored the attention as I forced my eyes to continue reading.

"You really are one insane son of a bitch, you know that?" Anko told me, and there was a slight showing of some emotion there that I couldn't place. It was somewhere in between concern and anger, if I had to guess. "Absolutely out of your mind, I tell you."

"I know..." I growled between my teeth. "But I don't want to put that part of my training on hold. Especially if my theory about this is going to be right in the end. I might actually need the Mark to use this Jutsu."

"You don't have to be the one to use it, you know?" She pointed out and I turned to stare at her, even as my blood continued burning inside me and my shoulder felt like it would fall off with the rest of my arm. The fact that I could even maintain conversation proved how much I had progressed. But I was still far from the smooth process that I wanted it to be. Maybe it would never be like that.

"I have to, if they really want this as soon as possible," I shot back, turning my eyes to the scrolls. I didn't actually manage to read much while under the effects of the Mark, but that was part of the training I had set upon myself.

[Cursed Seal: First Stage has gone up a level.]

'Thank God,' I thought to myself as I saw the screen, as I did with every level. The change in the technique's effect wasn't that noticeable, but it was something and any improvement was very much welcome. The sooner the thing stopped practically crippling me the better.

[Chakra Points: 588/900]

'And now it isn't burning through my chakra quick enough,' I thought, my teeth grinding against one another. I kept alternating between looking at the numbers and trying to read the texts until my chakra levels were low enough. It was a pain in the ass to do too, like waiting for water to boil, but actually being inside the water.

However, I couldn't even close the screen and ignore that while I worked, since I really didn't want to know what happened if my Chakra Points hit zero, especially using the Cursed Mark. My first guess was chakra exhaustion, which I knew was a thing and that was serious enough. But there was always the chance that the System made me different, and I didn't want to try and find out which option held true.

[Chakra Points: 38/900]

At that, I deactivated the skill with a sigh. Then I took a deep breath in and let it all out as I tried to relax my now tense muscles. It didn't take the lingering pain away, but it helped. I continued inhaling and exhaling slowly as I cleared my mind.

"Mad, I tell you," Anko said behind me and I almost snapped something at her.

"I believe you," Shirakumo said back.

In the end, I just sighed.

[}-o-{]

"I really want to spoil myself today," I mumbled as I looked at what I had to work with in the kitchen. I didn't know what yet, but I had already decided to make one of my favorite meals. The day had been a particularly tiring one, even though it held much the same stuff that all the others, Genjutsu Creation studying and Cursed Mark training with little more on the side.

I half-turned my head when I heard the door opening and closing.

"Naruto?!" I called as I started picking up ingredients. "How is the training going?" Last I had asked, a few days back, I had gotten a rant about Ebisu, a part that still followed canon, at least. So, I kind of expected more of that. Or, maybe, a rant about the 'Pervy Sage' he might have encountered already.

What I didn't expect was Naruto to walk in, sit at the table and look down at the wood without saying a single word.

"Naruto?" I asked, leaving the things I had been picking up on the counter and walking towards him. "Everything alright?" I was getting a little concerned. A quiet Naruto was always bad, no matter what, and the look on his face told me that it had nothing to do with a prank.

"I… I found a new teacher, did I tell you?" The blonde said, and his voice told me all that I needed to know. Hearing the usually bright and boisterous kid sound like he was dead inside was just wrong.

"No, you didn't," I replied, taking the seat in front of him. "Did something happen?" I asked this time, keeping my tone soft.

"He was teaching me about seals. Had some really fun ideas too," He told me, and for a second there, some of the life came back to him. It didn't last though, as he deflated a second later before continuing. "But… we were in this Training Ground today and… he threw me off a cliff," He said and I blinked.

I knew that was what happened. And I had somewhat expected it to remain the same. But… 'I'm so going to kick Jiraiya's ass,' I growled internally as a scowl took over my face. I took a deep breath in to not take my annoyance out on Naruto.

"Why… did he do that? Tell me something more or so help me I'll go and kill the piece of-"

"Everything was fine!" Naruto interrupted, likely stopping me from actually going through with that threat. The more I thought about that situation, the more angry I got. That was my brother the motherfucker had thrown off a cliff. "But… He did it so that I could contact the… the Kyuubi… and use its power."

"I… see," I nodded slowly. I knew that Naruto was more affected by Kyuubi's presence inside himself than his canon counterpart. Likely because my parents had been killed by it, leaving me orphaned. 'I guess they are my parents too now?' I thought wryly. The line between Eiji and myself got less and less clear as time passed. "And… How did it go?" I asked hesitantly. After all, I wasn't too sure how to react when we got into these conversations. They hadn't actually been parents, after all.

"I… met him," Naruto mumbled, blue eyes doing their very best to look at anything but me. "He… gave me chakra and I used these… Summoning Jutsu, like yours, with the spiders," Once more, his tone regained some cheer talking about something other than the Kyuubi, a spark that was quickly snuffed out again. "And I summoned this big toad to get me out but… I still used the chakra… and I talked to it… I... I don't know what to think about that."

"Naruto," I said, calm and collected, because that's what he needed at the time. I did my best to suppress any lingering anger at the Toad Sage for the moment. I could pay him back later. "I've told you. It doesn't matter what you have inside you. What matters is who you are and what you do."

"I know… but using that chakra… using its chakra… it felt so… wrong," He replied, his voice cracking and stumbling over the words. It made me speak again, if only so that I couldn't see my own brother spiraling down to a terrible idea of some kind that would only make matters worse.

"It's still Kyuubi's chakra, not yours," I denied quickly and decisively. "It's about time that you got a pro for keeping that shitty fox inside you, don't you think?" I asked, earning a slight smile in return. Progress at last.

"That's what I thought too, at first," Naruto nodded before his lips pressed together in a frown. "But still..."

"You said you met it," I interrupted, changing topics while I was at it. "How did that happen?" I knew how, of course. However, I still needed to ask that. It felt like a logical question to make and I needed something to distract Naruto while I thought over his dilemma, win-win.

"Uh?" He blinked at the sudden shift before frowning. "I appeared in a… place. It was weird… kind of like a dream. I was in a sewer and… well, the Kyuubi was there… behind big bars… That was it… I think..."

"Sounds like a Mindscape," I muttered and he turned to me, looking me in the eyes for the first time. "I've been able to access a place like that for a while. Mine wasn't a sewer, but it's… a manifestation of your mind, or something of the sort."

"Are you saying that my mind is a sewer?" Naruto scowled at me, although the corner of his mouth twitched up slightly.

"Well, I wouldn't be surprised," I replied with a smirk that softened after a second. "But it probably has something to do with the fox too."

"It can affect my mind?!" The blonde almost shouted and I grimaced. 'Poor choice of words...'

"Naruto, relax and listen to me, ok?" I spoke softly and slowly, managing to calm down, at least a bit, the very distressed kid in front of me. Sometimes, I forget how young we all were. Moments like these reminded me of that. "Remember how weird Sasuke was after the forest?" I started, hoping that the Uchiha would forgive me for giving away both of our secrets.

"Yeah? What does that have to do with anything?" Naruto asked with a frown.

"Well, Orochimaru marked him with a seal… and me too," I told him, pulling my shirt and showing him the three tomoe surrounded by seals on my shoulder. "Remember how I said I've been able to access it for a while?" He nodded, hanging onto my every word. "Well, after I was marked, I had a fake Orochimaru in my mindscape… together with something really weird," I explained. "And they are still there, but the mindscape is still mine, and they have no control over me."

"Are you sure?" I was almost insulted by the question, before I realized that he meant if I was sure the fox had no control over his mind.

"I'm sure," I reassured. "Besides, you can change how your mindscape looks as much as you want. I changed mine quite a bit since I first entered."

"What's it like?"

"I made it look like Konoha, actually," I told him with a smile. "All that mapping and drawing was quite handy when I was doing that."

"I'm sure," He said, shaking his head. I was just happy that he was more relaxed now.

"So, don't worry about that, ok?" I sighed, before standing up. "Welp, I feel like drinking some tea to calm down. How about you?" I offered, suddenly with a lot less appetite than I had before.

"Um… sure..."

"Now, about that chakra," I started, not turning to look at him, since I was pretty sure he wouldn't be looking at me anyway. "I don't care if you use it, Naruto. Especially if you need to. If you come back alive and whole, I could care less what you have to do for that to happen."

And that was the absolute truth. Even if I didn't know that Kurama was somewhat good under all that hate. I couldn't care less if that helped my brother in all but blood stay alive.

"I know, but still..." Naruto replied, clearly uncomfortable.

"Naruto," I interrupted firmly. "This mark I'm telling you about, we can use it for power. It gives us a chakra boost and our techniques are stronger… but the power comes from Orochimaru," I explained slowly. "Do you think I want to use the power that comes from that creep?"

"Well, no but-"

"Exactly," I nodded. "But I'm training to use it anyway. Because if it helps me deal with the Snakey bastard, or if it helps me deal with a threat to anyone I care about, it's good enough for me to do so. In the end… it comes down to what you want to do, Naruto. So long as you are still you, I'm fine with anything you do. I know you would never use that thing's power for anything bad."

"Eiji..." He mumbled, the sound of his voice coming out watery. I turned to smile at him and saw his eyes gleaming. "Thank you..."

"No, thank you, Naruto," I told him, drawing a wide-eyed look from the blonde. "Thank you for inviting me to Ichiraku's all that time ago."

"Ha," He chuckled with a shaky smile. "It's the Food of the Gods, believe it."

"Yeah… it really is," I agreed, grinning all the while. "You know what, let's go to Ichiraku's. I feel like eating ramen right now."

"Hell yeah! You are the best, Eiji!" He shouted, pulling me into a one-armed hug. "You really are," He added, much softer this time.

[}-o-{]

[Yin Release: Advanced Mirage – Lvl 1

B-rank technique with which the user creates an illusion for their target to see.

Hand Seals – 10

Consumption – 38 Chakra Points per illusion.]

[Yin Release: Greater Mirage – Lvl 1

A-rank technique with which the user creates an illusion for their target to see.

Hand Seals – 20

Consumption – 76 Chakra Points per illusion.]

'That's a sharp increase in cost if I've ever seen one,' I thought wryly as I looked at the new techniques in my skill list. 'On the other hand, they'll still go down to 1 Chakra Point if my guess is right. With a 2 and 4 Consumption reduction per level, either they stop at 1 Chakra Point like the others did, or they reach 0, which I really doubt,' I theorized.

"What do you think, brat?" Anko asked and I sighed before turning to give her an exasperated look.

"I think I'd work a lot better without you asking that question every hour or so," I shot back, more than a little annoyed. "I know this is important. I really do. I think it's possible, ok? I'm working on it. I just… I have to study much more to give an accurate time."

"This isn't important, Eiji," My teacher said, suddenly serious. "This is beyond important. This could end up with another World Shinobi War if things go wrong."

"I know!" I shouted, brows furrowed and hands clenched into fists. "I know… But that won't happen. Because I'll make this Jutsu. Just… just shut up." With a sigh, I turned back to the scrolls and books. "I still have to get around the issue of the sense of touch. A bit of muddling is fine, giving a fake sensation too, but taking it away is a little more complicated. It can get messed up really easily," I mumbled as I started reading, still talking but more to myself than to my teacher. "And you constantly questioning… isn't… helping..." I trailed off then.

My eyes unfocused as my concentration gathered solely on an idea that popped in my mind just then. 'Could that work?' I thought as my eyes widened. 'Could it be that simple?... Maybe,' I decided then, my brows furrowing. 'Simple but not easy, I don't think...' I mused, clicking my tongue and picking up an empty notebook that I was using to take notes.

Flicking a few pages forward so that I had plenty of space to write on, I started writing my idea. I heard Anko saying something next to me, but I ignored her. I needed to note that down before it vanished from my mind. And, more importantly, I needed to check if it was possible and what I would need to do if it was.

The first thing I needed to do was take out the sense of sight, I knew that much. It was also easy, even if it was noticeable as fuck and thus easily dispelled. Still, if my idea worked…

The second was sound, which was equally as easy to achieve, and also less noticeable, sometimes, in the middle of a fight. Especially if one went about it slowly so that it was less obvious, kind of like the frog in boiling water.

Smell and taste were even easier, honestly. They weren't very useful in a fight though, except maybe smell in very specific cases. However, for the goal of recreating the Void, they were essential.

The last, and the one that had been giving me headaches since I started, was the sense of touch. Messing with touch was a lot harder than doing so with any of the others. After all, as mentioned, there was a reason that pain broke most Genjutsu.

I paused.

'Is that all there is to the Void?' I wondered then, and my frown returned with a vengeance. I was sure that couldn't be it. The Void felt like… so much more than the loss of senses. There had to be something else that I needed to do for that.

"Be right back," I told Anko hastily and crossed my legs and closed my eyes and started meditating. Not so long afterwards, I was inside my mindscape. A second later, I found myself in a sitting position, floating around the Fake Orochimaru and contemplating my mind's version of the Void. "What do you think, buddy?" I asked casually, making my presence known to the Shade. I had been masking it, which was really easy since I was basically God inside my mindscape.

The only response I got was some babbling, to which I tilted my head. Had the Void completely broken his mind? It hadn't even been a month yet. How short had my stay in it actually been if someone like Orochimaru was already completely out of it after so little time? 'It really doesn't help when one's senses are… denied...'

'Sense of time… is that a thing? What else would there be for me to negate?' I thought my mind gears started to turn once again. 'Sense of balance? Sense of hunger? Sense of space?... Is there something else I'm missing?'

'I'll have to ask for that info. That might be the key… If not… How do I find out if I'm missing something,' I turned my eyes to the Shade. 'He is the only one to have truly experienced the Void besides me… at least, as close to the Void as this is, which I'm suddenly wondering if it's really accurate...'

'Still, he is my only clue,' I decided, taking a deep breath in and considering my second idea of the day. This one, contrary to the other, sounded like a really stupid, really dangerous idea. But, it also sounded like a necessary one and, more importantly, like something that would work.

With a sigh, I created a room around the Shade of Orochimaru. A pure white room with a bed, a window with white curtains and a sight of the endless Void, to remind him of what awaited if he tried to mess with me. Everything else was just like the first room inside my mindscape, the room from the hospital in my past life. I had never been able to forget that, despite my memory losing track of almost everything else.

"Let's see if you still have anything resembling a mind in there, ok, buddy?" I asked the Shade, who was still babbling unintelligently like a baby, occasionally moving erratically. Opening the white door and stepping back outside in the Void. "Time to go back, I think… but first…" I turned to the floating cube that was the room and started drawing intricate patterns over the outside walls. I had become proficient in that, after creating the cube that contained the Purple Flames. Besides that, I put a trigger in the door. It wouldn't open if the Shade tried to get out. Instead, the whole thing would disappear and he would be left floating in the Void once more.

After a moment of thought, I added another 'feature'. After an hour or so, the room would appear again around the Shade. I needed him sane, if possible, so leaving the Shade in the Void for an extended period of time would be bad for my plans.

It looked like a normal room from the inside. But it was just a nicer cell for the Shade to be in. That was all there was to it.

"Now, let's investigate all these possible other senses that I have to work to make non-existent," I said as I willed myself outside the mindscape.