28

Adeline

Excited as fleas, the girls and I head to the shopping center we passed on our previous visits. We have seen three apartments, and although the first two were nothing like the ads, the third is a real gem. Less than fifteen minutes by Metro from the University of Washington, the apartment is on the fourth floor of a stone building with an elevator, and the building is conveniently located across from a large park. We would each have our own room, a large shared living room, and an open kitchen. It's already furnished, which would save us the trouble of organizing a long and tiring move. Honestly, I want it.

"I really hope the landlord picks us," I say, smiling.

"We have to keep our fingers crossed," mimics Esther to my left.

Since she finally confessed her affair with Jayden, we have become much closer. Although we were hurt by her silence and lies, Holly and I understood that her intentions were not evil. Who would we be to judge her for something she couldn't help? I, for one, cannot blame her. But the jealousy is undeniable, and every time I see her and Jayden in the same room, my mind can't help but make up stories. But it has happened, and stirring up trouble is a very bad idea.

Once inside the mall, we settle into a small café-bar and each order a freshly squeezed fruit juice. It is a crazy world out there and people come and go in the aisles with their hands full of shopping bags. It's quite hot outside and we welcome the coolness brought by the humidity of the indoor fountains.

"Have you heard from the boys?" Holly asks me.

"Yeah, Cameron told me they went for a walk in the Fremont district."

"They could have waited for us," Esther grumbles.

"At the same time, they can't wait all day while we look at apartments," I try to defend her.

"Yeah, I'm just a little jealous..."

"Me too, I'd rather walk the streets of Seattle, you know," I continue, laughing.

"If all goes well, we'll do that with them tomorrow," Holly adds, brushing a strand of hair from her face.

Once our fruit juices are on the table, we toast quickly, proud to be together, in Seattle, and about to sign a lease for an apartment. I take a quick look around, admiring the hundreds of stores that make up the five-story mall. A clearing of throats catches my attention and I see my friends looking at me with interest.

"So," Esther begins, "what's the plan with Jayden?"

"The plan?" I repeat, confused.

"What are you going to do now that you know you like him?"

I furrow my brow as I look into her eyes.

It seems pretty obvious to me.

"Nothing at all."

"Why?" Holly asks me.

"Because he's my brother," I answer, emphasizing the last word as if it should brand me with a hot iron once and for all.

" Adeline, come on," Holly complains. "Astrid is your sister. Henri is your father. Cameron and Jayden are not your brothers."

"No, it's true that their mother is not in a relationship with my father," I reply.

"And so?" Esther continues. "You're not from the same place."

"When she says 'place,' she means you weren't conceived by the same..."

"Thank you," I interrupt, giggling. "I'd rather not imagine my father and Mia in bed together."

"Or anywhere else," Esther laughs.

"Anyway!"

I bring my glass closer and take a few sips of my fresh juice. My throat is dry, it's terrible.

"You know," Esther continues, "when I said it was disgusting, Jayden and you... I didn't really mean that. Well, yes, at the time I was disgusted at the thought of the two of you together and..."

I see Holly put a hand on our friend's thigh, her face tightening as the words come out of her mouth.

"I know," I reassure her. "We don't need to talk about it."

"We just want to make sure everything's going to be okay," Holly says. "For you, for both of you. If anything should happen, or if you need support."

"Everything will be fine."

I deliberately ignore the last part of Esther's sentence. Nothing will happen. We must not.

We should not.

I remain silent, only taking another sip to wash down the saliva that has collected under my tongue.

"I just wanted to let you know that I won't interfere between you two. Well... I don't want this whole thing to affect us," Esther continues.

"It won't affect us, I promise."

She looks at me with a genuine smile on her face and my heart tightens. I don't think I deserve her. It's up to me to back off, it's the girls' code: you can't touch guys your friends like, and obviously she liked him first. Yet here I am, unable to give her what she expects, even though I know I shouldn't be doing anything with Jayden because I'm too selfish to give up my place. With tears in my eyes, I clear my throat and lower my eyes to my glass, which I fidget with nervously.

Topic closed.

***

Excitedly, I enter the apartment and walk down the hallway to the back room, where a door swings open to reveal a half-naked figure. I had almost forgotten that it was only eight o'clock. Damn.

"What's going on?" Jayden looks at me with sleepy eyes. He stands in the doorway, scratching at the top of his head, trying to tame his unruly hair. Damn, I had almost forgotten how handsome he looks, even in the morning. I ignore him as I walk past and enter the girls' room without knocking. I turn on the light and the room lights up before me. A growl escapes their throats and a sudden movement causes the covers to be pulled up to cover their faces as I jump onto their bed.

"I just got a call, guess what?" I say in a voice that is perhaps a little too high-pitched for my taste.

"What?" They both finally answer in unison, pulling the sheets down from under their chins.

"The apartment is ours!"

They both jump out of bed screaming and join me in an incredibly ridiculous dance of joy. Then two muscular arms wrap around my waist and lift me into the air. For a few seconds I imagine myself against a forbidden warm body, but my eyes meet another pair of dark pupils.

"I'm so happy for you!" Cameron kisses me on the cheek before congratulating the girls. I turn my head toward the bedroom door and find Jayden leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his bare chest. He smiles at me, never taking his eyes off me as he nods his head in silent congratulations.

"Not even a day here and you're already set up. More productive than you, it's impossible," Cameron teases us. "When do you sign?"

"The owner is expecting us there at ten o'clock."

"Can we join you?"

"Of course," I admit with a smile.

"I'll take a shower then. We don't want to be late," Holly says as she searches the room for her things.

"I'll make breakfast then."

Jayden's warm voice fills my ears and I keep my eyes on his back as he walks down the hall. Something truly attractive has been radiating from him since we arrived in Seattle. It's physical, sensual, almost... erotic whenever he looks at me. I feel that there is some kind of silent connection between us. He doesn't ignore me anymore, and after more than two hours of sitting next to each other in the car, he's different. More attentive, more smiling, less distant.

So how am I supposed to fight my feelings and keep them hidden when he acts like I am finally part of his life?

***

"Your apartment is insane!" Cameron says, wiping a drop of ketchup from the corner of his mouth with his hand still full of food.

"I can't believe it," Esther adds next to me, dipping a fry in my Chinese sauce.

"You really got lucky. Plus, it's in a great location," Holly says with a squeal of delight.

I take a last sip of my iced tea and set the cup down on the tray. Two fast food meals in three days. I won't make a habit of it, or Seattle won't do my waistline any favors. After our meal, we head to the nearest subway station and take the train to the university. Since we have the afternoon off, Jayden takes the initiative to give us a tour of the campus.

What can I say except that it's beautiful? I had seen dozens of photos of the place, but seeing it in person is even more exciting. Several red brick buildings in a British architectural style face us, more or less hidden by huge trees. In the middle is a huge park, where the dozens of students present can relax in the shade of the flowering cherry trees.

"So to get around, you'll find it's pretty easy," Jayden begins, positioning himself in front of us like a tour guide. "Each path and street on campus is named after a different county in Washington state."

He points to several signs to reinforce his point, then begins walking down one of the paths, making sure we are following him.

"You'll also find maps if you ever get lost. Don't hesitate to ask the students, they'll be happy to help you."

We take a few more steps and discover a partial view of the city with Mount Rainier in the background. Truly, this university is magnificent. I don't think I'll ever regret my decision to come here.

It almost makes me want to start the year right away.

He continues to take us to explore every corner, allowing us to admire the stadium, some corridors and amphitheaters, before leading us to the inevitable place: The Suzzalo Library. An architectural wonder in neo-gothic style, right out of the Harry Potter universe. We enter and are not disappointed by what we see. Hundreds of books are arranged on shelves, topped by stained glass windows several feet high. All the tables are made of wood, lined up in rows and illuminated by dark lights.

With all this, if I don't succeed in my year, it's really a lack of willpower.

A dead silence pervades the library, and the slightest movement of a chair echoes against the stone walls. We decide to leave to continue our tour, and Jayden suggests we have a coffee and relax on the grass. No sooner have we stepped outside than we hear whistles.

"Jay!"

All eyes turn to a group of guys walking towards us. Several of them are wearing university-colored caps, and large bags decorated with a husky hang from their shoulders. A tall blond breaks away from the group and approaches us with a football under his arm.

"When did you get here, man?" he says, hugging Jayden.

"I just got here a few days ago. My brother's coming for the school year.

I'm showing him around."

"Your brother? Damn, two whites here, that's gotta be something," Cameron teases.

"Believe me, with that name, the girls will be eating out of your hand.

Don't react. Don't think about it. Don't be jealous..."

"Paul? Are you coming?" a guy from the group calls to the tall blonde.

"I'll be right there!" he replies over his shoulder. "Dude, I'm sorry, I have to practice right now, but there's a party at the Epsilon girls' house tomorrow. You should come!"

"No, it's not just the two of us," Jayden says, nodding in our direction. There are also Cameron's friends.

Friends. Okay, so I don't matter and I'm relegated to the same level as the girls... A friend. It's not like we've been living together for years. Well, if you consider that Jayden lives at home.

No. A friend is good, actually. Much better than a sister.

A thousand times better than a sister.

I don't want to be his sister.

The blonde cranks her neck to give us a sideways glance before turning back to Jayden with a slight smile.

"All the more reason to bring them, I'm sure they'll be thrilled to have their first sorority party with us," he says with a wink before disappearing.