5

What Is Dating Procedure?

September had disappeared fast for the students of Hogwarts School, and October had descended on the castle with a fury of rainy days. For the first two weeks, it felt as if a hurricane was raging outside the stone walls, but eventually, the rain went away, and autumn was revealed in bursts of gold and red in the trees.

It was on one such morning near Halloween that found Harry Potter on his regular morning run with Neville Longbottom huffing along at his side. Neville had made good progress over the past month. He no longer collapsed during their run, and could keep up with Harry though it was still tough for him.

"So, the first Hogsmeade weekend is coming up." Neville panted. It was still quite dark out, but the first slivers of dawn could be seen illuminating the mountains. "Are you excited?"

"Should I be?" Harry replied in his even monotone, looking slightly bewildered at his companion.

"I thought you might be a little." Neville replied with a grimaced smile. "It's a chance for us to get out of the castle and away from schoolwork and all that. Plus, it's nice to be able to go with someone special. Have time alone without worrying about things, you know?"

Harry stared blankly at Neville for a few moments until the boy chuckled. Neville really had come to like hanging out with Harry. He'd never really been a wallflower, but he'd never really been the life of the party either. Neville was friendly with his housemates, but until Harry had invited him to join him in his morning exercises, Neville didn't really have someone he would call a true friend, but Harry was quickly becoming a real friend.

"I guess you wouldn't." Neville laughed. The joke had clearly gone over Harry's head as he just turned back to their exercise. "I'm just saying it's a really good excuse to ask out a girl for a date. Though I imagine you've had more than a few of the girls asking if they could be your personal tour guide."

This statement made Harry stop running, and Neville nearly fell to the ground at the sudden stop. Harry's eyes were narrowed in contemplation, as if he were remembering something. Neville watched him for a moment, trying to figure out what had made Harry freeze.

"A date?" Harry asked, looking to Neville who was doubled over gasping for breath. Harry's companion had readily agreed to join Harry in his exercises nearly a month ago, and though he had made great strides in his physical ability, he was still nowhere near Harry's league of fitness.

"Yeah, a date, you know…" Neville panted, clutching a stitch in his side. "You ask a girl out, and then the two of you go out."

Harry stared blankly at Neville, making the other boy fidget a bit under that steely gaze.

"You… you go out together. Have a meal or just walk around and talk or you go…You haven't got a clue about what I'm talking about, have you?" Neville asked, realizing that everything he was saying was going right over Harry's head.

"I was trained in combat, not… ." Harry said evenly. "Is this normal behavior? Going on dates?'

"Well yeah, but it's not like a requirement, Harry. If you want to go alone, or go with friends, that's okay too. You can go with a group of friends and just hang around." Neville replied with a shrug.

"Is that like a date as well?" Harry asked, starting to look confused.

"No. Well, yes it could be, I mean…If you go with other couples, I mean. it would be like a group date, but it doesn't have to be." Neville stood up and saw the clear confusion on his new friend's face and let out an exasperated sigh. "Maybe it would be clearer if we got Hermione to explain it."

Harry nodded and started his run again, slower now so Neville could keep up a bit better. Neville suppressed a groan as he began jogging to keep up with Harry.

"Are you going on a date?" He asked. Neville perked up a bit and began smiling.

"Yeah." He said, looking a bit silly. "I'm still shocked by it, but Hannah Abbott asked me. I've kind of liked her for ages, and I've been trying to get up the courage to ask her out, but I guess she got sick of waiting or something."

"Girls can ask boys to go on dates?" Harry interrupted.

"Yeah. It's not exclusive or anything like that. Look, it's really simple. If you fancy someone, you ask them out. If they say yes, you take them out for a meal, or for some sort of activity you both enjoy. Sometimes, you take a girl out to do something she enjoys, even if you hate it." Neville panted.

"Why do you do that?" Harry asked curiously.

"To show that you care about what she likes. Girls do it for boys all the time. Pretend to be interested in Quidditch or whatever just because they like being around that particular boy. Like Lavender and Ron. I know for a fact Lavender hates Quidditch, but Ron loves it, so she supports him, and goes to all the games just to spend time with him."

"So… she lies to him?" Harry quirked an eyebrow.

"No. You never lie." Neville said quickly. "You just swallow your pride and put her interests ahead of yours. It's respectful… or something. It shows her that you care about her, even if what she likes bores you to tears."

"So, if Hannah asked you out, is she taking you for … food?" Harry asked, still confused."

"No, I'll be taking her out." Neville replied, feeling a bit of relief as Harry was steering them towards the castle.

"But she asked you out." Harry reminded Neville.

"Yes, but I want to show her that I like her, and so I'll be the one treating her." Neville said, looking at Harry and nearly splitting his sides with laughter at the look of pure confusion on Harry's normally stoic face.

"What are you going to do?" Harry asked, clearly trying to understand dating better.

"I don't know." Neville shrugged. "I mean, we'll probably have lunch, but other than that, I don't really know."

"Shouldn't you have some kind of plan?" Harry looked at his friend with curiosity.

"Well yeah, I suppose. I might ask Susan for some ideas."

"You ask other girls about the girl you're going to date?" Harry stopped again looking thoroughly confused by this.

"Umm…Oh it's like gather intelligence." Neville said with a sudden burst of inspiration. Harry's confusion seemed to melt at this somewhat as Neville was now speaking to Neville in a way he understood. "But the girl isn't your enemy or anything. You're finding out from her friends what kind of things she likes so you can show her a really good time and she'll want to go out with you again."

"You want to go on more than one date?" Harry's brow furrowed. "Isn't it a bit repetitive?"

Now it was Neville's turn to look confused. He tried to find a way to answer Harry but nothing he came up with made any sense to him so how would it help Harry.

"You said it was simple, but the more you explain it, the more confusing and meaningless it seems to get to me."

"I guess it is at that. We'll have Hermione explain it all to you." Neville said between peals of laughter. "She's really good at making sense of things. Maybe she'll help me understand it better too."

The two boys headed into the castle and up the stairs towards Gryffindor Tower. Neville was still chuckling, while Harry was trying to get it all straight in his head. He wasn't a moron by any stretch and understood that boys and girls got together, though he was unsure on how it happened. His Godfather, and the others who were responsible for him had been rather quiet on the topic of courting. Harry had overheard more than a few drunken conversations where broom cupboards were mentioned, though at the time, he'd been too young to understand, or really care.

However, he had been told before coming to Hogwarts that he needed to work on making friends and spend time with girls. That last part had been said with a sly wink. Harry hadn't understood at the time, and was sent off before he could inquire about it further. Yet, when he'd met Hermione, he had thought he had fulfilled that requirement. He'd made a friend and been able to spend time with a girl.

Still, Harry knew on some level there was much more to it than just eating meals and studying together. He'd seen both boys and girls interacting around him. He also could remember being introduced to Nymphadora Tonks when he was fourteen, and how it had changed a lot of things.

Harry had of course been going through all the normal changes at the time. Puberty was a real pain in the ass Harry had decided. Sirius had explained a lot of things as best he could, but there were things that Harry had never asked about because he wasn't sure how to even broach the subject. And then one day, Sirius introduced his cousin, Tonks.

The next year and a half had been full of really awkward moments. Both alone and in front of Tonks, who seemed sent from hell to torture him. Having not really having had much contact with women before, Harry became a stumbling, stammering wreck of a soldier, and it made him very angry. The problem was, he felt shame when he wanted to ask Sirius about the strange feelings and urges he felt whenever he saw her or thought about her. Tonks seemed to know his weakness, and would exploit it in their training sessions. What was worse, she seemed to like to keep him off balance at other times. Little things would trip him up. She would give him a look from across the room, or suddenly drop her wand and bend over to pick it up. The very worst had been when she came out of the bathroom one morning wrapped only in a towel, which had slipped and nearly come off of her.

Eventually Harry had managed to build up a defense against her tactics, but the questions were always there. And his drive to become a superb warrior deemed those questions unnecessary.

And then, out of the blue, he was suddenly taken out of the world he knew and sent to school with hundreds of other people his age and order, more or less, to become part of this world. A world which had been his birthright.

"At the time we felt you would be better served to be kept hidden. Trained for what was going to come." Sirius had told him in his study a month before he was to board the Hogwarts express. "We, who thought we knew best felt that by keeping you away from other people and prepared for all of this, you'd be ready when the time came, but we forgot one key component to it all. Yes, you're ready for the fight, but you don't understand why."

"Because Voldemort is evil, and needs to be destroyed by me. The prophecy said…"

"The prophecy is crap." Sirius said quickly. "I've told you before, if it hadn't been for that prophecy, things would have been very different. Your mother and father would still be alive, and you would have gone to Hogwarts when you were eleven like other kids. The prophecy started all of this, and we swore an oath to protect you and help you grow into a good man. I think we've done a decent job of it, but we didn't let you grow. We molded you into what we wanted. We took away you individuality, and we need to make up for that."

"By sending me away?" Harry asked. There was no malice, or ill will in his voice, only confusion.

"Harry, this is really important. You have to go and be with people your age, and experience what it means to be young. You need to make real friends. Not people who are teammates or allies, but real friends. You need to go through all the things teenagers do in order for you to fully understand why we're trying to deliver Voldemort to Hell. One day kid, this war will be over, and if you don't do this now… there's going to be nothing for you when it's over, and I could not live with myself if I allowed you to wind up worse than Moody. Go to school. Make friends, and get into trouble. I expect, given how well I know you, by Christmas, you'll start to understand why this decision was made for you."

So far, Harry had two friends in Hermione and Neville. There were others he spoke to fairly regularly. Lavender and Parvati were starting to become closer to Harry, and he hadn't minded the two girls, especially as he had seen they were becoming protective of Hermione. There was Ginny Weasley who had started hanging around him, but she irritated Harry. The girl could not stop talking. She spoke so fast it often gave Harry a headache. Also, the redhead seemed to annoy Hermione for some reason.

Harry got on alright with his roommates now, especially as he and Ron had come to some kind of unspoken agreement. Ron no longer said anything disparaging about Hermione when Harry was within earshot, and Harry no longer glared at the boy. Seamus had joked that Ron likely didn't want to find himself in a "Pansy-like" situation in front of a bunch of girls.

As far as he could discern, Harry had done as he'd been told, yet he felt no closer to understanding the whole point of this exercise was. And yet, he felt the answer was being dangled right in front of his nose.

Girls.

Could it be that girls was the answer to the question? And if so, how? Was he fighting to protect them somehow, or was it something else entirely? Or was he way off the mark with this because of his conversation with Neville?

Harry shook his head at the thought of the girls of Hogwarts. Everywhere he went they would stare at him, almost like he was a very juicy steak, and they were all starving. Harry had fought dark wizards, but girls actually made him tense up when they stared at him like that. It was very unsettling. Sometimes, the strange things he felt around Tonks would reappear, and Harry would find himself looking for the closest exit just to escape the unsettling looks girls would give him.

In fact, Harry could only think of three girls who he didn't seem to become a mess when they were around. Hermione, of course, had always treated him as normal as she could. He knew that she had difficulty interacting with him at times given his upbringing, but she still had proven to be a trusted ally. She was endlessly patient, though she was very guarded when he was around. She always seemed as if she were waiting for something terrible to happen, and it affected him, though he couldn't quite say how.

The next was Luna Lovegood.

Harry had met this very strange girl on his third day at Hogwarts when he was finishing his morning run. She came out of the woods, and had very nearly been cursed. Harry had managed to prevent himself from uttering words that may have killed the girl when he saw she was a student.

"Good morning Harry Potter." She had said with a rather ethereal sounding voice. She had very long dirty blonde hair that went all the way down to her slim waist. She had rather large protuberant blue-gray eyes that felt as if she were looking through him. Harry thought that she reminded him of something he had dreamed of when he had been younger. Sirius had called them angels.

"Uh, good morning."

"Thank you for not hexing me. It was not my intention to startle you." She said.

"May I ask why you are awake so early, and what you were doing in the forest?" Harry asked, stepping closer to the girl.

"I was collecting Velepsi spores." the girl smiled dreamily, opening her bag and reaching into show Harry a large reddish brown mushroom cap. "They're really good for warding off Wrackspurts, and several of my roommates are infested with them."

"I see." Harry said, finally holstering his wand again. "I didn't get your name."

"Oh, my apologies again for my rudeness." the girl said with a soft musical laugh. "My name is Luna Lovegood. I'm in Ravenclaw house."

"Lovegood." Harry said, pondering for a moment. "You wouldn't happen to be related to Xenophilius Lovegood of The Quibbler, would you?"

"He's my daddy." Luna's smile grew.

"Well then, please tell him I really enjoy his work, though I do wish he'd bring back the Vincent Vampire cartoons. They were my favorite growing up."

"I will." Luna smiled brightly. "I think he will be pleased to know that you read our magazine."

Harry and Luna began walking back to the castle together. "I learned very early on that the Daily Prophet, and a few other papers reported mostly empty stories or outright lies. I kept reading them because you can always find a grain of truth, and it might be the most important part of the story. Your father always reported the truth, though, and please don't take offense, some of his stories are a bit… outlandish."

"For example?" Luna asked. Harry was worried he may have offended the girl, but after he looked at her, it was clear she was simply trying to discover what Harry meant by outlandish.

"Well, the Rotfang conspiracy." Harry began. "While I'm sure there are people scheming to bring down the Ministry, I doubt that it would be the Aurors, nor would they use gum disease. If I had to guess, I would say that it would more likely be the Unspeakables, seeing as they have access to some of the most powerful magics known."

"Interesting." Luna nodded. "I guess that does make a bit of sense. Madam Bones is far to honorable to use Dark Magic, especially seeing as her brother and sister-in-law were killed by it, and the Unspeakables don't really answer to anyone."

They walked for a bit in silence until they reached the Entrance Hall. Luna turned to Harry and shook his hand.

"Thank you Harry Potter, it was very enlightening to speak to you. Perhaps we can do it again another time."

"It would be my great honor, Miss Lovegood." Harry said with a small smile as he turned to head back to Gryffindor tower. Harry had gotten a bit of ribbing from Seamus and Dean when he revealed to them he'd met Luna. Apparently the pretty Ravenclaw had a bit of a reputation for being quirky.

"She's out of her mind." Seamus exclaimed.

"Did she ask to see if you had Doibininies?" Dean asked, having trouble hiding his laughter.

"What?" Harry asked, looking confused.

"She asked if I had them last year, and want me to drop my pants so she could see them." Dean roared with laughter. "She said she had heard a few girls talking about how big my willy might be, and she thought some creature might have attached itself to me making me bigger or something, and she wanted to se for herself."

"You guys lay off of her." Neville said sourly. "She's not so bad, and she already gets enough rubbish from her housemates."

Harry had not spoken to Luna since that day, but he had noticed she often ate alone during meals, usually humming softly to herself or reading a book as she ate. Harry kept reminding himself he should try and speak to her more. She could prove invaluable, though he wasn't sure how just yet.

The last girl whom Harry had noticed didn't get all strange when he was close by was Katie Bell. It was Hermione who had explained why.

"Don't be fooled." The bushy haired girl smiled. "Katie watches you just as much as any other girl, but she's really good about hiding her attraction. She's probably trying to figure you out before she makes any move. She's got very high standards, and she probably wants to make sure she's not going to end up wasting time with you."

"Better get showered." Neville said, breaking through Harry's thoughts. "Hermione will only wait for so long before she goes down without us."

Harry had his routine down to a science, and showered, dressed and gathered all he needed for the day's classes in a very short period of time. Neville always took a bit longer, especially in the shower. Harry wondered why that was, but never asked. Neville had also started to copy Harry's example, and before bed, would collect everything he would need for the next day ready to go before he went to sleep. Neville was usually ready about ten minutes after Harry now.

As usual when the two boys started to head for breakfast, Dean and Seamus were only just waking up while Ron snored away.

"It's no wonder he eats the way he does." Neville shook his head as he passed Ron's bed. Maybe if he started getting up at a decent hour he could enjoy his breakfast for once."

"Good morning." Hermione greeted the two boys, noting the humorous look that had materialized on Neville's face. "Are you alright Neville, you don't usually look so chipper after your workout. Did you two not go running this morning?"

"No, we did." Neville replied with a grin. "But during our run, Harry and I got to talking, and it seems our friend needs you to explain something to him. I tried to, but I'm not really good at making people understand such complex concepts."

"Well, Alright." Hermione said with a shrug. "What's the topic?"

"Dating." Neville replied, fighting to keep from falling over with laughter. Hermione stopped short and stared incredulously at Neville. It almost looked as if her brown eyes were going to pop right out of her head, which only served to make Neville have to fight his laughter even harder. Harry simply stared interestedly at the pair, Neville chuckling, and Hermione looking mortified.

"You want me to explain dating?" Hermione asked as Neville began leading them out of Gryffindor Tower looking as if he might pass out from holding in his laughter.

"Neville believes it would make more sense to me if you explained it." Harry said in his typical monotone. Hermione felt her face getting hot, which was saying something as she never got embarrassed anymore. At least, she thought she didn't get embarrassed anymore.

"What is there to explain?" Hermione stammered. "You like someone, you ask them out."

"Yes, that's the only part I think I understand. But why? And what is it one does on a date? What is the procedure?" Harry asked.

Hermione blanched. "Procedure?"

Leave it to Harry to make something like dating sound like some sort of military exercise. Hermione looked at Neville who was fighting another grin, and she suddenly felt the urge to kick him. This was like some sort of horrible prank, she was certain of it.

"You know, I'm really not the right person to ask about this sort of thing." Hermione said waving her hands frantically. "I know a lot about a lot of things, but I really don't know…"

"Hermione, there is no one more observant or more knowledgeable about human interactions" Neville smirked, earning a serious glare from Hermione.

"Neville, you know as well as anyone I've never been on a date." Hermione hissed.

"You haven't?" Harry asked curiously. Hermione stopped short. She hadn't meant to admit that.

"That's not true." Neville remarked. "You were Krum's date for the Yule Ball."

Harry turned to look at Hermione with expectant eyes, making Hermione's face heat up again. She tried to look away, but Harry's bright emerald eyes held her gaze. She tried a couple of times to speak but only tiny strangled squeaks came out.

"That was different." Hermione argued. "That wasn't a date really. It was a … Ball."

"What's the difference?" Harry asked. Neville actually looked interested at this as well. Hermione could only stand there gaping at them

"Fine." She snapped. "Fine, I'll do my best, but I think you'd be better off asking Lavender or someone."

Harry nodded and the three went into the Great Hall. Hermione grabbed Neville's arm and squeezed it hard. "You are helping me with this." She hissed. Neville had the good sense to nod and keep himself from laughing to hard.

They sat at the end of the table as was their norm, though Neville had only started joining them in the last week or so. Harry immediately filled his plate while Hermione suddenly felt a lack of appetite as she watched Harry. He began to eat at his normal hurried pace, though he was no where near as disgusting as Ron Weasley.

"You know, it's ok to slow down." She remarked. Harry cocked his head slightly and gave her a questioning look.

"Forget it." She said as she finally took a few pieces of toast.

"So tell me about dating?" Harry said between bites.

Hermione huffed, throwing a sidelong glower at Neville who was pointedly looking towards the head table.

"Well, first you have to figure out who you fancy." Hermione sighed.

"How do I do that?" Harry replied.

"I don't know." Hermione all but shouted. "What do you find attractive in a girl, Harry?"

Neville turned now, interested to learn what kind of girl Harry Potter found desirable. Harry sat in silence, looking puzzled before he finally looked at his two friends again.

"I don't know." Was his response.

"Well, that kind of makes asking a girl out difficult. If you ask out someone you don't like, you won't enjoy dating at all." Hermione said a bit sourly.

"What should I find attractive?"

Hermione simply stared at Harry. This was by far the strangest experience of her entire life now. Never would she ever have imagined that she would be sitting in the Great Hall trying to figure out how to explain to a boy the concept of attraction. The major problem was that she wasn't really sure if she understood the concept herself. She knew what she found attractive in boys. Intelligence was important, of course. Honesty was important. Someone who could communicate well, and someone who would appreciate her for who she was.

She'd be lying if she said looks weren't important to some extent. She didn't really have anything specific though that turned her head. So how could she explain to Harry and make him understand it?

"I blame you for this." Hermione scowled, turning to Neville who was laughing again.

"Harry, mate. Maybe you and I can hang out this afternoon, and I'll help you figure that out." Neville offered. Harry nodded his appreciation while Hermione pinched the bridge of her nose, trying in vain to ward off a headache.

"I am going to really hurt Neville." She said to herself.

"Ok." Neville smiled as he and Harry sat in the Library. Neville had chosen the library for this conversation as it would most likely have the most girls in it at one time, giving him a wide variety of examples.

"Now, there are two things to consider when finding someone fanciable. Looks and personality. And, as personality is a little easier, we'll start there."

Harry nodded his understanding and Neville continued.

"It's important to find qualities in a girl that you like, such as good sense of humor, brains, or one who doesn't giggle incessantly. Personally, I find girls who are smart, funny, and easy to talk to the most attractive. It's why I like Hannah."

"What do you mean by easy to talk to?" Harry asked curiously.

"Well, ok… when I talk to Hannah, I don't get tongue tied. I can talk to her without being afraid of saying something stupid. I don't feel so nervous that I can't talk at all."

"Is that a problem that happens often?" Harry cocked his head.

"More than you think." Neville smirked. "I don't know why it happens. I don't think anyone does. But if you really like a girl, and you approach her, you might suddenly find that you can't speak. Your chest feels like a giant is stepping on it, and you can't breathe. Or all the things you planned on saying suddenly vanish from your mind, and you can't think straight. It's not a spell or anything, it's just nerves. When Hannah asked me out, I was actually shaking."

"Does this happen to girls?" Harry asked. Neville nodded.

"They express it in different ways. Take Ginny for instance." Neville smiled. "Ginny really likes you in a romantic sort of way, but she's really nervous around you. That's why she laughs so obnoxiously whenever you say something remotely funny."

"I don't like that." Harry said flatly. Ginny Weasley had a very high pitch squeal like laughter that felt as if someone was driving spikes into his ears. She also would laugh this way at the strangest times, and it really bothered him.

"See, We've just figured out one thing you don't like in a girl. You probably want someone who's comfortable around you." Neville looked triumphant.

Harry nodded.

"Um…ok, uh Romilda Vane. When she sees you come into the Common Room, she blushes."

"I don't know who that is." Harry said. Neville nodded.

"She's never talked to you, so that makes sense. She's a fourth year, with … it doesn't matter. The other day when Leanne tried asking you for help on her Charms homework. That seventh year girl…"

"I remember." Harry said, and Neville continued.

"She was stuttering and tripping over her words because she was nervous."

"Strange." Harry shook his head. "I thought she might have taken a bad confounds hex."

"Now the other thing and what some people might have you believe is the most important thing is how a girl looks."

"Why should that matter?" Harry asked.

"I wish I knew. All I know is that you start liking someone based on how they look. Usually, anyway."

"How do you mean?" Harry asked.

"Well, for me… I find I'm more attracted to blonde girls. Girls with blonde hair I mean. I also like a girl that isn't super tall, or super short either. Hannah's only a bit shorter than I am, and she's got great legs."

"Great legs?" Harry asked, looking a tad confused.

"Yeah." Neville smiled. "You can't really see them because of the school uniforms and all, but last summer, I hung out with her and Susan Bones. Susan's Aunt has a swimming pool, and well… I got a real good look at what is hidden under Hannah's robes. She's got a real flat stomach, and long smooth legs. Her chest is really nice as well."

Neville got a far away look in his eyes and Harry just sat there waiting for his friend to come back to the library. It took a few moments but Neville finally shook himself and turned back to Harry as something caught his attention and he pointed it out to his friend.

"Ok, that's Lisa Turpin." Neville said in a lowered voice. Harry turned to see a tall willowy blonde girl at the corner of one of the aisles. She was standing with a book open in her hand, her long lightly curly blonde hair was pulled into a ponytail. Harry saw that she had taken off her robes, and was in the basic uniform of black tights, dark gray knee length skirt, sweaters shirt and tie.

"Lisa's another girl who I find attractive physically. She's tall, but not taller than me, and she's slender, which I like." Neville explained, his voice still barely above a whisper. Harry observed Lisa as Neville spoke, understanding why she would be considered attractive.

It was clear now that she didn't have her robes on why she could be thought of as appealing. Lisa was quite a specimen of womanhood, with, from what Harry could see, slender calves, that were nicely shaped. Her chest was prominent as well, though she managed to hide it with her arms and the book. Her skin was soft cream and she had high cheek bones, giving her a somewhat aristocratic look. Lisa suddenly looked up, feeling someone watching her, and gave a strange yet soft smile to Harry who nodded in greeting. Lisa's cheeks began to turn pink and she wandered back into the aisles.

Harry watched her go, and couldn't help but begin comparing Lisa to Hermione. Both girls were tall and slim. They both had fare skin, and shapely legs. Yet, Harry found that while Lisa was indeed pretty, he favored Hermione, though he couldn't say why.

"What is the point to all of this." Harry asked as he turned around, sounding irritable. Neville guessed that Harry did not like being confused, and dating was very confusing.

"The point of all of it is that one day you find the right girl and fall in love. You get married and have a family."

"A family." Harry said thoughtfully. Neville noted something in Harry's eyes that he'd never seen before. Like he was remembering some long forgotten dream or something. "So dating leads to a family, then?"

"Yeah, I guess. Not immediately, but yeah, that's why you date, to try and find the girl who you like best and who makes you feel… I don't know… better? Someone who you might fall in love with one day and marry."

"Love." Harry nodded.

"Please don't ask me to explain that."

"I already tried with my godfather." Harry said evenly, returning to his normal tone. "He was telling me about my parents and he kept mentioning how in love they were. When I asked him…well, it didn't really go very well for either of us. We decided to just agree that love was a very deep and powerful magic."

"That's jot very far off the mark." Neville nodded.

"So, how can you tell if you like a girl enough to want to date her?"

"There's a lot of ways. How you feel when that girl is around. How often you think about her. Do you think a lot about what it might be like to kiss her…"

"Kiss her?" Harry looked up and Neville shrugged.

"Yeah." He shrugged. "Kiss her. You know… press your lips against hers… maybe use your tongue or…"

Neville recognized the look on Harry's face at once and quickly looked around to make sure no one was listening in.

"You've never kissed a girl, have you?" He asked. Harry shook his head, his eyes distant as if he were once again trying to work out kissing. Neville groaned lightly and dropped his head into his book. "I don't even know how to begin explaining that one, and it's just going to lead to more weirdness."

"Weirdness?" Harry looked back.

"Oh yeah." Neville said looking up. "Kissing leads to… well… I can't." he shook his head. "The only way to really learn is to kiss someone."

Harry suddenly got to his feet and collected his things. Neville, not wanting to be left behind got to his feet as well. A moment later he was jogging to keep up with Harry who was heading for the Gryffindor common room, like a man on a mission.

"Where are you going mate?" Neville asked as he caught up to Harry.

"To learn about kissing." Harry replied, looking determined.

"Oh this is not going to end well." Neville thought, though he found he was rather anxious to witness the inevitable train wreck, and began wondering who Harry might ask to help him learn, and how there might be an all out brawl in the Gryffindor Common room

Ten minutes later they were passing through the portrait hole and walking into the Common Room. Neville nearly walked into Harry when he stopped to look around. Spotting who he was looking for, Harry marched over and looked down to the girl curled up in a chair with a book in her lap. Hermione looked up to see Harry looking at her with a strange expression on his face.

"Are you alright?' She asked, suddenly worried.

"I need you to kiss me."

At that very moment, one could have heard a feather land upon the floor.