I never felt a dissonance so chaotic than just then. So many thoughts, so many emotions running rampant I didn't even know which I should tend to first.
Thinking so much, and yet thinking nothing at all - like someone just uncoupled the compartments from my train of thought, and just to exacerbate things further, the brakes were out... and a broken bridge was right in the distance.
Jay was that broken bridge in the distance, and every step he took closing in towards my position also brought one step closer to that cataclysmic plunge.
It was the same back then. Like hell if it was going to be the same now. I wasn't going to fall just yet.
That invisible muscle, that tennis ball in my palms, I held it, strained it... I raised my hand forward.
"Oh, I wouldn't do that, man..."
He said it so easy. The hell does he think he is trying to sound like a friend? We were never friends. Never have been, never will be.
I kept my hand up.