To My Stepsister Iris, With Hatred

I, Athena Cloverfield, the rightful heiress to the noble House Cloverfield, found myself pondering a single question in the depths of the dungeons. At the same time, I graciously await the day of my execution.

"Why do all the bad things happen to me?"

I looked back at the last few years of my life and tried to pinpoint when everything went wrong. Was it when I offended the royal family with my high and mighty attitude towards the royals? Maybe it was when I insulted the Holy Lady by saying God doesn't exist. Perhaps it was all because of that time when I failed that magic aptitude test.

But no, none of those were the actual cause of my downfall. The answer, the only true reason, had been within me all along, waiting to be acknowledged.

Yes, Iris, you accursed soul. My life is ruined, all thanks to you.

Maybe I wouldn't have met or offended the crown prince or the Holy Lady if you didn't exist.

If you hadn't come into my life, into my home, my father wouldn't have died in that stupid war.

Your existence alone has caused me so much misery that I stopped believing in God altogether, for if he existed, why had He cursed me with your presence in my life?

What have I ever done to you? Why must you torment me so? How have you managed to stay in my life despite my efforts to drive you out of it?

I hate you so much, Iris. You may be half my sister, but the other side of your blood must be of a devil or demon like you have been to me since you entered into my life.

If only I hadn't bothered to interact with you. That way, I would have avoided all those unnecessary confrontations with everyone who had the terrible luck of getting involved with you.

I'm days away from my execution, from my pitiful death. Yet, you walk free amongst the common folk, where you and your pathetic lot should have stayed put.

Once that axe swings upon my neck, I'll curse you for all eternity, and I hope I haunt your dreams for the remainder of your undeserved life.

To my stepsister Iris, with the most profound hatred of my soul, I despise you.

---

Finishing the last sentence of my hatred-filled letter, I threw the feather pen at the cold stone wall of my cell as hard as I could. But it barely touched the wall and floated to the ground right next to my now scrawny, malnourished legs.

I sense a tear falling off my right eye, but I don't bother to wipe it away. I barely have the strength to pick anything up, much less wipe away a tear.

Sigh. My beautiful feet, reduced to such a pitiful sight.

I pulled my leg closer to me, and I stroked my thin, bruised toes. I used to ask my servants to groom my toenails so that they would look like a noblewoman's feet, even when I removed my shoes. Now look at them. I bet it looks worse than any other pitiful commoner's feet out there.

I notice a bit of dirt on one of my toes, and as I reach out to swipe it away, I see a few strands of my hair fall onto the ground. I reach up towards my head and stroke my own head, feeling the remainder of my smooth and beautiful blonde hair that has long withered away.

I guess that is what will happen to any person's hair when they don't have even a bucket of water to wash it with. Speaking of which, when was the last time I had water? Weren't those scumbag guards supposed to bring me some yesterday? Did they seriously forget... no, they definitely just didn't bother to bring me some.

Then again, even if I had some, I couldn't possibly use it to clean myself. Those perverted scumbags would most definitely peek at me while I wash myself off. Who knows what they'll do to me after they've seen my body? I'd rather preserve my purity than my dignity when I die.

...what a depressing thought to have. Mere years ago, I was the most respected and admired daughter of House Cloverfield. Now, I'm just a lowly prisoner who's comparing purity with dignity.

A-Ah. I can't stop my tears. I feel like my heart is breaking. This sucks so much. I just want to go home. I'm so hungry, too. I can almost feel my bones digging into my insides.

What have I done to deserve this punishment? Something about me betraying the kingdom? I didn't do anything! I only knew what they talked about once they talked about it! I was framed! Why does no one believe me?! If Father were still alive, he'd stand up for...

Oh, Father. How are you in the afterlife? Rest assured, Father. I'll join you in a few days. Perhaps with my head detached, but I'm sure you'll recognise me even then, right?

...I miss you so much, Father. Why did you have to leave me? You were my only family.

It's all because you brought Iris home. If only you didn't. We would still be a happy family. I didn't need a sister, and I don't care if she lost her mother too. She didn't belong in the family anyway. This was my happy family, and she ruined it all. I bet she ruined my happy family because she lost hers. What a despicable person she was. How could she?! I can't believe we're even related. How can she be ruthless to come and ruin my family? I don't deserve this!

The day you brought her home, I could already sense that she hated me. I tried to be friendly, you know? I really did! But all she did was ignore me! I tried so hard to be a good sister, and all that time, she just pretended I didn't exist. Seriously! I remember that tea party. I even offered her my treasured premium tea cakes, and she just sat there without touching anything! Even though I nicely invited her! And I can only get those tea cakes once every year! And she let it go cold! What kind of a monster does that?!

...urgh. Thinking about those tea cakes made me hungry. What an awful memory.

Sigh. Just kill me now. At least let me die with the thoughts of tea cakes. Oh hey, look, the walls look like squares of cakes, don't they? Let me count them. One...two...three...

"HEY CLOVERFIELD! DO YOU NOT HEAR ME, YOU BITCH?!"

...four...five...

"HEY! ARE YOU DEAF?!"

Hmph. I hear you. I just don't want to acknowledge you. Unless it's about bringing me some water or food, I see no reason to even talk to you scumbags.

"Um. Athena?"

Wait. That voice sounds familiar. Sickeningly familiar.

"I've...brought some food and water. If you like, I can come in and give it to you. Help you wash up, too?"

I turn around and see the face I hate the most in the world.

"Iris. Why are you here? To laugh at me? To mock me the last few times? Hmph. You better get in them. I'll be dead in a few days."

I glare at Iris intensely, hoping that my hostility will drive her away. That or hopefully stop her from abusing me verbally. I don't think I can take much more forms of torture. I already feel like I'm at rock bottom.

"Athena... why... why would I ever do that? I... could never. Please, let me go in, sir. I would like to take care of my sister."

Oh, look at you. Trying to act all nice and good for the guards, are you? I bet this is how you seduced the crown prince to frame me. It was you, wasn't it? You framed me. Now, you're here to finish up the last act of your whole plan. Fine. Go ahead. Insult me all you want. I won't show a single reaction. I'm not letting you have the last laugh here.

"Oh lord Almighty, Athena, your hands...they're so thin. Have they not been feeding you? How could they do this to you?!"

Wow, I'm really impressed. Your acting skills are really good. If I didn't know any better, I bet I'd fall for it, too.

"Here, have some croissants. They're your favourite, right? Quickly, have it before the guards notice."

...well, I'm not going to reject a good croissant...oh they smell so good. Urgh.

I took the croissant out of her hands and I took a small bite of it, and before I knew, the taste of the soft fluffy bread hit my tongue, and I could not stop myself from devouring the whole thing.

Oh my. I haven't had anything this good since I got imprisoned here.

Damn it. I'm going to cry. Damn it, damn it, damn it all. Don't let her see your weak side, Athena Cloverfield. She's here to finish her act, not actually being nice to you. Don't get...don't get tricked.

"Athena? Are you...okay? I mean... I know you're not. But are you hurting anywhere? I can't use healing magic, but I can do something for the pain, at least..."

Shut up, you monster...you...you're the reason I'm here. Stop it. Stop acting like you care...

Unable to hold my emotions any longer, I blurt out my thoughts. "Stop it. Stop being nice to me."

"What?"

I raised my head and stared directly into Iris's eyes.

"I said stop being so nice to me. I know you hate me. You...you're just here to mock me. If...you have a heart somewhere in your chest, please, I beg you. Stop it and leave me alone."

Iris widened her eyes and stared back into mine. Then she held my hands up and held them tight. I couldn't believe what she said next.

"I don't hate you, Athena. If anything...I love you. I love you so much."