Chapter 5.2 (14)

Thog whispers from behind Marcus.

Thog: You okay, buddy? Uh... Why don't you-

Gregor pokes at the tail.

Markus has one of his hands gripped into a white knuckled fist behind his back.

Thog: Okay, let's just get you down from the table, okay?

Markus winces in pain.

Thog: A- as you can see, Your Honor, this man is clearly not a demon. Just a man who desperately wants to be a demon. He's a sick and sad individual.

Markus: Uhh.. Strike that from the record, please. I'm not sick nor am I sad.

Thog: No, keep it. Um, he's a sick and sad individual who just desperately wants attention.

Markus: I wouldn't say desperately, but- Thog: Why don't you sit down, Markus.

faint laughter

Markus: Ughh.

The point of a new tail, whips back and forth idly beneath Marcus's clothes.

Gregor: Your Honor... I am also a human.

Gregor: Um..

Gregor starts pulling out his own hair.

Gregor: As you can see.

Markus: Ashe! Ashe, stop him.

Gregor: Human hair hurts to pull out.

[Markus laughing]

Gregor: And thank you.

Markus: You have a-

Gregor: Bless yourself.

Markus: You have a mind for legalities like none I've ever seen, Gregor. None I've ever seen.

Ashe: So Thog, level with me. What's the chance of recovery here?

Thog: You talking about Markus's horns and tail or uh... the chance of pulling out of this legal nosedive..

Ashe: The legal nosedive part..

Thog: Oh, oh yeah okay um..

Thog: The way I see it, they're already pretty set on their conviction. Our kind doesn't have many natural resources so we tend to barter talent instead. You'll see. You'll be declared inhuman, declared property, and sold off to the highest bidder.

Alexander: I say 50/50 on myself to being sold but I see your point

Gregor: What- what if I pulled on Ashe's hair?

Ashe: What?

Ashe pushes Gregor away. Or at least attempts to try to push him away.

A flicker of dark flame sweeps between Marcus's now present again horns.

Markus: I'd like to see them try.

Guard: Sir! Sir! Your Honor, he did it again!

[Laughter]

Guard: Sir, I saw demon magic! Demon ma-!

Markus: Sleight of hand. Sleight of hand, nothing more.

Thog: You couldn't-

Markus makes a magical sound effect which resounds slightly in the room

Thog: You couldn't keep it in your pants for five minutes eh, Marcus?

Markus: Thog. I don't need this from you right now.

Thog: No, I think you do need this. From me. Right now.

Judge: Regardless, I would like to see a demonstration. If they have the powers that the opposition proclaims they have... perhaps they could demonstrate them for us?

Ashe: And how do you propose that we demonstrate these supposed powers to you?

Judge: Hmm...

Ashe: Well, first could you perhaps list out what these powers apparently are? We came into this somewhat blind. I believe that we were literally handcuffed and thrown into... what was it? Just a box?

Markus: Ahh-

Ashe of turns to Markus and Gregor.

Markus: A crate of some sort..

Gregor: You guys got a box?

Ashe: What did you get?

Gregor: Whips.

Alexander: I got a clubs and then a box

Ashe: Oh.

Markus: Oh. wo- oh.... Wow.

Markus: I got a box. I got a box yeah..

Ashe: Wow.

Ashe: Something like a box. But we were dumped out of the box into this room. Point being, I'm still rather uncertain as to what were exactly being charged with

Markus: I'm certain...

Ashe: And I'll apologize if I'm speaking out of turn but-

Ashe: Curiosity an all.

Markus: If I may, I'm quite curious as to the efficacy of this court. You Honor, could I see your credentials?

Ashe (whispering): Oh my gosh!

Markus(also whispering: Shhs!

Ashe: Markus..

Markus: I got this.

Ashe: Markus!

Markus: I got this!

Ashe: Markus, stop!

Markus: Ashe!

Markus: Please! Ashe: Markus!

Ashe: No. Markus!

Markus: This is what I do.

Ashe: I know this- this, what you do gets us in trouble.

Markus: Isn't it great?

Ashe: No, it's not great. We're about to be sold as slaves.

[Laughter]

Judge(regular volume): Interesting... here.

the judge hands a sheaf of papers to the closest guard to himself, who then hands the papers to you.

Judge: You'll see everything's in order.

Markus examines the paper.

[Papers rustling] Markus: Hmm.

Judge: First in the class, from the temple.

Markus(back to normal volume): Yes. Interesting.. and I'll assume you have copies of this?

Judge: Uh, no. Only one diploma-

Markus: Ah. Of course.

Judge: -is issued.

Ashe: Mar- Markus. Markus!

Markus: Ah, Gregor, I..

Markus: Are you hungry at all, Gregor?

Ashe: Markus.

Gregor: No?

Markus eats the diploma a seemingly bold move from someone who so far hasn't shown to understand Alaran law

Ashe: Markus!

[Papers crinkling and rustling]

Ashe: Oh-h!

Gregor: Markus, were you going to feed me that?

Markus: Ummg!

[Markus coughs]

Gregor: Oh, okay then.

Markus: Certainly would have been preferable to.. phh!

Alexander: I feel like there are better ways to accomplish that

Markus: Uhh, hmm. Your Honor,

Markus: You're no Honor at all.

Gregor: As you can see..

Gregor: A demon would have incinerated that with evil magic.

Judge: I.. I don't understand what eating my class diploma would do when we judges us are given divine right to arbitrate. I'm..?

Markus: Now Your Honor! Your Honor, observe.

Markus climbs up onto the judges desk and bend down on to one knee. From behind the man's ear...Marcus pulls the contract, unrumpled and completely uneaten.

Judge: Guard, seize him.

Markus: Nothing but sleight of hand, sir. Nothing but sleight of hand.

both guards grab Marcus's arms, slamming his head down into the desk.

Markus: Ugh! Just like home.

Markus is dragged away and throw in the penalty box.

Gregor: Well! Looks like we need a new lawyer. Someone to spearhead the challenge and face the dangers of law. The court.

Ashe: Thog? Maybe..

Gregor, notices Markus's glasses which he has left on this table shining.. gently.

[Clink]

Gregor casually takes the glasses and puts the glasses on. Suddenly my mind races with legalese.

[Pages rustling - muffled voices]

Gregor: I understand it all.

Thog: You gonna stop this shit or should- oh there he goes.

With that Gregor has rushed forward towards the desk of the judge to pled his case

[Laughter]

Gregor: Your Honor.

Please let us go.

[Laughter]

The judge leans forward, places his elbows on the table, interlocks his fingers and says,

Judge: No.

[Sighing - laughter]

Gregor: [I put the glasses back on the table.]

[Faint laughter]

Thog notices the glasses glisten gently.

[Clink]

Thog takes them and puts the glasses in his pocket.

[Laughter.]

[Ashe coughs]

Thog: So, you gonna try anything before you're declared a nonhuman and stripped of all your rights?

Ashe: Yes? Yes. Yes, I am! What are the chances.. of perhaps-

Gregor: An appeal!

Ashe: borrowing-

Ashe: No, Gregor. Please.

Markus: No, I think he's on to something here.

Ashe: Please, Gregor.

[Laughter]

Thog puts his hand on Ashe's shoulder.

[Laughter]

Thog: It was nice doing business with you.

Gregor has once more approached the judge with a new idea in his mind

Gregor: I'd like to appeal to your humanity.

Judge: Uhh, excuse me?

Gregor: A human would not do this to another human.

Therefore you are not human.

Judge: Oh my god...

Gregor: Unfit to be a judge.

Prosecutor: Guards- guards seize him.

[Laughter]

Judge: No, no wait. I want to hear this one out.

The judge motions to the guard nearby. Has put Thog his head in his own hands.

Gregor: Please sir, if I- if I may tug on your hair.

[Laughter]

Judge: Guards, seize him.

[Laughter]

Markus makes a mental note 'Uhh... does not like being touched.'

Ashe shakes her own head and turn to Thog.

Ashe: Thog, you whoreson. You knew this would happen whenever you dumped all of your problems on us- You knew!

Ashe starts to reach out and start to choke Thog

Ashe: You knew that they would try and throw us into jail!

Thog very, very, calmly removes your hands from his throat.

Thog: Uh, Judge, can I get a little uh 'guards, seize her'?

[Faint laughter]

Ashe: AHH!

[Laughter]

Ashe is dragged away from Thog and placed in the penalty box with her friends.

[Faint laughter]

Alexander: What would you say I was a foreign dignitary

Judge: your an inhuman under prosecution of Alaron law so I think you can guess

Alexander: Guards seize me

Gregor: Well..