The Truthful Past

I awoke in my bed, staring at the bland white ceiling. The ticking of a clock filled the silence in the room, almost luring me back to sleep. My eyes flashed back open, irritated. I needed to get up before I fell asleep. I didn't want to wake Sebastion up with another one of my terrible nightmares. They where so vivid last night I woke up screaming and panting. Drakos's son always filling my dreams as he did the most terrible things to my body. Always claiming that I would come back to them. That I was destined to fill my place by Drakos's side as a warrior. Of course I knew it was just a dream, Drakos's son was dead after all. I killed him. It bothered me that he continued to plague my dreams.

I went to roll over and I paled. The the fabric underneath me was wet and soft. I pulled back the sheet that covered my body and realized I was still in my towel from the pool last night. Sebastion you idiot. You should have woke me up last night when we got back. I could have changed instead of drenching the mattress. I decided that it would be better to put on clothes instead of sitting in a water puddle. My skin was pruned as I dropped the sopping towel on the floor and walked over the the closet. We shared a closet because quite frankly, we don't have a lot of clothes. One side was filled with my shirts and pants, and the other was Sebastion's. Not like it really made a difference since we always wore the same thing. Black shirts, pants, cloak, hood, and a mask. Standard Assassin uniforms. It's one of the things we could never drop because it was implanted into our every day life. The norm in other words.

I stepped out of the closet after dawning on a fresh set of clothes and squinted. The dim light from the window told me that the sun had started to set and we had slept most of the day. My stomach whined at me angrily. The twisting nauseated feeling punishing me for neglecting my body food. I sighed as I patted my flat empty stomach. If I was hungry, Sebastion was going to be hungry as well. But he could be so hostile if he woke up to early. With my hand on the door, I stood their contemplating my final decision. He would wake up if he got to hungry. The last thing I wanted to deal with, was a hangry Sebastion. He could be much worse than a female sometimes.

I checked on Sebastion's sleeping form one more time before exiting out the door. Shutting it quietly so as not to disturb him. I turned to walk down the hall, but was met by an intense set of stormy blue eyes. I yelped in surprise and slapped my hand over my mouth. I hope that didn't wake Sebastion. He would strangle me.

"I didn't mean to scare you. I'm sorry." Drake held one of his hands up defensively. There was a slight amused smile as he retracted his hand away from the door. I narrowed my eyes at him, my heart beating loudly in my ears. Damn him for catching me off guard. Why the hell was he here?

"What are you doing? I find it creepy that you hang outside my door!" I hissed at him, briskly walking by him. My stomach growled again and I cringed. I hoped he didn't hear my desperate stomach as it growled. But to my dismay Drake chuckled as he followed closely behind.

"First off, I wasn't hanging out by your door. You just have excellent timing. And with the way your stomach is growling, I thought you might be hungry. So I came to grab you before Lola threw it away." No one else did, so why was he? I cast a weary glance at him as I pushed open the door to the commons room. He was getting more annoying than I originally thought. This had to stop, there was no way he was going to weasel his way into my life. There was just to much darkness that I would rather keep behind closed doors.

I sat froze as Aspin, Lola, and Merrick sat at the table. All chattering stopped. I was hopping it would just be me tonight like it always was, but it seems that dinner ran later than usual. They stared at me as I casually walked over to the plate that had been prepared and placed next to Lola. Courtesy of Drake no doubt. She placed a smile on her lips as I pulled out the chair and plopped down next to her. Drake sat on the other side of me, his mouth also set in a smile. I glanced between the two as I picked up my utensils. I wasn't liking the attention as all eyes where set on me.

Just ignore them Aria, once you finish your food you can go back to your room. I inhaled the smell of seasoned venison, potatoes, and corn. Such a wonderful combination of smells made my mouth water. My stomach growling once again, I carefully dug into my plate and savored the first bite. The meat was so juicy and tender it basically melted in my mouth. It exploded with a rosemary spice. They all waited quietly for me to finish, the room silent. With each bite I grew more annoyed. Why where they not talking? They where fine before I came in. Was it because I normally didn't eat with them?

"Don't stop talking on my account." I mumbled as I brought my plate over to a dirty white sink. "Is my company so bad that you need to stare while I eat?" Irritation seeped through my normally bland and unemotional tone. Curse these bastards for getting a rise out of me. What where they expecting any way? For me to just chime in and start a conversation? They knew we didn't like conversing. Not once have we ever gone out of our way to start a casual conversation with them. It has always been work related.

"Sorry, we didn't mean to be rude. We just worry about you dear." Lola commented as I washed and put the plate away. I sighed as I closed the cupboard. I couldn't help roll my eyes at her, obviously not believing a word she said. Drake must have something to do with this, because up until today everything was normal. Now it was disrupted and I was forced to mingle with these...people. Very well Drake, I will entertain you just for tonight. But don't be surprised when I snap at them just as I always do. Maybe then you will leave me alone.

Much to their surprise, I sat down next to Lola and crossed my arms. I raised an eyebrow at them and they uneasily let the conversation resume. They talked about how food was going to start being scarce if they didn't stock up. Aspin made a few comments about he use to be an expert fisher man, but unfortunately we didn't live near any ponds or rivers so he was practically useless. Go figure.

"You and Sebastion go hunting a lot do you not? Maybe you can help us." Lola asked, a hopeful smile on her face. I pursed my lips, not really sure how to respond. We didn't hunt for fun or for survival. We hunted because if we didn't, we surely would go on a killing spree to sedate the hunger to murder. To feel our blades slice flesh as we cut into enemies and watch their bodies fall to the ground with a pleasant and sickening thud. Apparently last nights kills where not enough to sedate the ever growing hunger. Damn, we would have to go back out again to get rid of the itch.

"We don't normally hunt for fun, but I suppose on our next trip we could grab an extra. We normally pawn off our findings to the nearby village for a few coins." I told her with a cool tone. Merrick placed his cup down and furrowed his brows.

"What the hell is the point of hunting then if you aren't going to eat it?" He leaned on the table, his arms folded. I chuckled darkly and gave a grim smile.

"To quench our desire for murder." Merrick's eyes widened in surprise and the room went quiet. I was quite satisfied with the reaction and leaned against my chair. If I couldn't avoid them, then sharing a few bits and pieces here and there would definitely get them to quiet down and to leave us alone. But unfortunately Aspin wasn't totally fazed by my answer because he slammed his fists on the table with excitement.

"Not going to lie, I'm mad I didn't get to see you guys in action yesterday. I bet that was so cool!" I couldn't help but look at Drake and remembering his, half hearted compliment. 'That was unsettling to watch, but good work.' When was death ever pleasant? It was necessary, not convenient.

"For your sake Aspin, you better hope you don't. We don't kill like normal people do, and we have been told it's...unsettling." Drake pursed his lips together and said nothing. He knew I tossed that last comment at him. I wouldn't lie and say I didn't feel somewhat disappointed that he didn't make a remark. But again, this didn't deter Aspin and he kept the shining twinkle in his eyes. What could I say to douse out that fire in him. Being an Assassin was not everything it was cracked up to be.

"Damn, I wish I could be an Assassin! Stealth, skill, and wealth! I bet it's nice." He leaned back in his chair. Awe in his eyes as he day dreamed. This idiot. He knew nothing about what it was like and the hell that Sebastion and I went through. The damn night terrors, the memories. I would forever be haunted till the day I died.

"I don't know where you get this fantasy from. It's really not as glorified as you think. I would give my life if it meant no one would serve under Drako's again. Better yet, I would kill Drako's myself if I could. No one should ever enlist under him." Drake leaned on the table, his face lit up in interest. "If you want to learn how to fight so bad, I can teach you. I use to be a General and that's not promoted easily. But this idea you have that Assassins are amazing and everything is perfect, it doesn't exist. This fantasy that has been spun in your head is nothing but propaganda to get Drako's more soldiers. " My answer wasn't good enough, because he looked at me, disbelief written all over his body language and face as he once again leaned against the table.

"How bad could it possibly be? Why are you so against being an Assassin. You where a General so clearly you didn't have to many complaints. " He threw his hands in the air. The door slammed opened and Sebastion emerged, angry. His eyes where set on Aspin as he crossed the room and to my side.

"Leave her alone about it already. How many times does she have to tell you!" He spat. Drake observed us quietly, watching with such intensity that it made me believe he already knew. Or he had some fragment of an Idea. But I knew that no matter what, Aspin would never leave this alone so if he knew the truth, he might drop this big fantasy of his. Then maybe he would leave me alone. I bit my lip as they continued to squabble. Sighing I placed a reassuring hand on Sebastion's arm and he quit. I tried smiling, but it faltered. It wasn't something I really wanted to talk about and he knew it. He was just being protective. I faced a lot of hard dealings with the Guild. We shared a lot of terrible memories and worse yet we shared a secret that was kept between us, and Drakos.

"Sebastion. it's fine. He doesn't know the truth like you and I. It won't hurt just this once to explain it to him." I spoke quietly to him, trying to calm him down. Sebastion and Aspin glared daggers into each other, silently I knew that Sebastion was thinking of many ways to hurt him in his head.

"Are you sure Aria? If you are comfortable then fine, but don't let this damned brat pressure you because he is to naïve to know the truth." He spat. I pasted on my best smile and nodded at him. Like I said, maybe this would quiet him down. Sebastion dragged his eyes away from Aspin and sighed. He was a good brother, with good intentions. But those intentions where for me only.

"The legacy has to die somewhere and it might as well start at this table. Besides, this group's sole purpose is to take down Drako's. So we might as well let everyone know what he is capable of." I mused. With a defeated sigh he sat down next to Drake, concern written all over his posture. "I appreciate your concern Sebastion. But at least they will leave this table a little wiser. We are a team after all." He nodded once begrudgingly as he leaned against his seat. The table had grown quiet as they sat waiting for me to talk. They where leaned forward, the suspense building with each passing second.

"We where ordinary kids once. Two kids with a mom and a dad. Normal and happy as could be. We lived on a farm and provided what we could to our nearby community. Everyday we where loved and cared for like any other child. It was peaceful and life was great. That was until Drakos arrived one day with his glorified assassins. He killed everyone he could get his hands on. Any child he deemed fit, was immediately enlisted into his ranks. If they refused they where murdered on the spot. Of course you could imagine how that went. So with the help of a few near by neighbors we escaped. They claimed that they would take care of us in our parents stead, but that was all a lie." I paused, trying not to choke as my emotions rose to the surface. I cleared my throat and continued.

"These neighbors of ours where notorious for there abuse of drugs. And with their place of living gone they needed a new fix. We lived with them for maybe six weeks before they sold us off to Drakos for a fix. I don't know what hurt worse, the trust that we developed being broke, or the fact they agreed to sell us for a small bag. Not that it mattered because seconds after the purchase he killed them anyway. Called them despicable people. It's the only time I've ever agreed with him on anything. So from there on out it was endless brutal beatings. I was raped for the entertainment of the other assassins. I needed to not only be fit, but also able to 'provide' for them. Regardless of how well we did, it always ended up by beatings and rape. Our fast learning and obedience is what kept us alive and carried us far. If it hadn't been for Master, who knows where things would be right now. Even more so, if it hadn't been for the loyal friends I made along the way, I probably would have killed myself. The Assassin's Guild is not for the weak." I sat silently at the table, knowing I hadn't told them the full truth. I knew an inkling of an idea of how things would turn out. Drakos has something scheming before I left, something called the Secret Project.

We didn't stay long to find out what his project was though. But the creepy smile on his face every time he brought it up, let me know it was probably for the best. Over the years working at the Guild, soldiers would go missing. Drako's claimed that they had climbed the ranks and where sitting prettily at the the top, but we never saw or heard from them again. Two of my greatest friends Nicklos and Gavin had been recruited to his ranks, and to this day I question if they are even alive. I just hoped now they would understand that an assassin was no life to have. Even to this day I was haunted by these memories, and by the loss of my cherished friends.

"Aria....I had no idea I'm so sorry." Aspin whispered. His face was of pure horror. His body was tense as he stared down at the table. I chuckled darkly, a tear escaping my eyes.

"I know you didn't Aspin. That's why I told you. It's better, to reveal the truth before you end up down the wrong road. Full of resentment, hate, and blood lust. Any chance we had at a normal life was squashed the day we where sold to the Assassin's Guild. Now we are trying to make up for our wrongful deeds and hopefully one day redeem ourselves." There Drake, is that what you wanted? Are your questions answered? I met his eyes with mine. Sorrow was plain on his face, but he was quiet.

Not feeling like conversing anymore, I shoved my chair away from the table. Apparently they didn't either because they say quietly staring at the table. The air was dense and thick with depression. If they where going to get bothered by that small bit, they wouldn't even begin to handle what the rest of my life was like. What would they do if they knew my deepest secret? The Full Secret that Sebastion hadn't even fully known. Would they still stand here and call me a comrade, or would they call me a monster instead?

"I am going to retire for the night. Do not let my past effect you in any way. It was not my intention to cause you misery, more of just enlightening you to the truth. Please, enjoy the rest of your night." I gently squeezed Lola's shoulder before walking to the hallway. Sebastion had got up from the table as well and stalked after me. I hoped that after this, they would leave us alone.