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I Just wanna relax in my new robotic life!

(*[A/N]so before I give the actual synopsis, yes I am making one more fic, mainly because the idea shoved itself into my head so violently that I couldn't just put it into the idea book, I had to make it, dunno how long it'll go, but here it is.*) So, I died, dunno how, or why, but I did, I floated for quite some time in the void, the only things keeping me sane(at least somewhat) during that is that when I 'woke up here' so to speak I was in a new robotic body, it's a strange sensation, and that I've had all my memories fully refreshed as if I just made them, since I'm a robot now, they won't degrade anymore(hopefully) anyways... Where was I going with this? Oh right, explaining how I got into the situation that's unfolding. *SLAM* "Hey! Cool robot guy! Join my crew!" said the future king of the pirates. "Yo mecha dude, you got any more of those nano-whatzits the one you gave me before broke" said the strongest hero. "Machine man! I need you to get me more of those Thermo-shurikan you made for me! They absolutely destroyed the training dummys I tried them out on!" said the Jinchūriki of the nine-tailed fox. Yeah, somehow I ended up in a tavern that connects to random anime worlds. Maaan I just wanted to end up on a planet and just lived out this new robot life of mine. [A/N the picture is an AI generated Picture, I have 2 others I can pick from, chose the most relaxed one. I have absolutely no idea where exactly this will go, but I had to do it.]

Duncan_Quan · Tranh châm biếm
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2 Chs

Chapter 1 Coping with being Mr Roboto, and Arriving in an interdimensional tavern

Before my eyes was nothing but infinite blackness, nothingness stretched on for infinity, or at least that's what the little indicators on the edges of my vision say infinite ∞.

'I should be freaking out right now, I should be screaming out but making no noise as there is nothing' I thought to myself.

'Strangely, I feel... Not much, no touch no sound no smell, heck, I've tried moving my arms in front of my face to see something other than this, blackness, but nothing.' I thought once more to myself.

I tried doing everything to change something, anything, but nope, nothing happens.

'Oh well, at least I can remember stuff to pass the time' I thought.

And so for however long it took, I simply floated there, in the void, just playing video games in my mind, since I figured out I became a robot(I know, it took playing a game of C&C tib war with myself in my head that I figured out I was a robot) I can change my sight to some different views, of course the void still remained, but I can change it to my memories so I can look around my room and play on my computer.

I was in the middle of playing a game of X-com 2 with my usual loadout of mods(*cough* barely under 500 mods *cough*) and listening to some of my tunes on memory Spotify(suck it Spotify, you can't put ads into my memories!) when I felt something, like actually felt something, it wasn't any of the normal senses, but I could tell something was off.

So I pulled out from my memories, and basically came to lifting my head off of a wooden bar table.

'Was it all just a weird dream?' I chose not to voice my question as I was a normal person who didn't randomly voice their every thought.

Looking around at my surroundings it seems I've come to at a tavern of some sort, on the surface it looks like a fairly standard fantasy tavern, the tables, the Bar, but looking a bit deeper it looks odd, I can sometimes notice there are lines on the walls that are sometimes illuminated by some light that sometimes pulses going up, and looking out of the windows it looks like theres nothing but stars out there.

As in literally it's as if we're on a spaceship and I'm looking out into space, but I've never seen that many shooting stars happening consistently, I've counted 41... make that 42 shooting past in the few seconds I spent just staring out of the window.

'Well, at least I'm not staring out into an infinite blackness.' I thought relieved that I wasn't just going to spend forever in my own mind.

I heard the sound of a crumpled up ball of paper land on the table I was at.

I looked down at the ball, I think that was thrown at me but I didn't feel the impact.

I looked around more, and saw I wasn't alone, there were people just coming and going, most of them ignoring me, some glancing at me then going back to what they were doing.

"...ey!" I finally was hearing again and could hear the hustle and bustle going on around me, but there was something else there too.

"hey!" I think I heard something closer but I was too focused on trying to piece where I could swear I saw quite a few of the faces on the people in this tavern.

"HEY! YOU BUCKET OF BOLTS!" ah that's what it was, someone yelling at me.

"Yes?" I questioned while turning my attention to who was yelling, also wondering why no one appeared bothered but more focused on the person now standing in front of my(surprisingly nice looking) table.

In front of me was a guy, I'd use a more eloquent word if there was one that could be applied, but he literally was just as if you booted up some 3d story driven game and plucked npc male number 4, or maybe 6? From it and just brought him into real life.

"Why are you here!?" he said(loudly I might add, still wondering why no one was even paying attention to him).

"I do not know." I answered truthfully as I see no reason why to state anything else in this circumstance.

"Oh? you do not know? I do not believe you! tell me why you are currently sitting where young master Cheong sits!?" he interrogates, so more information, it seems this generic mr genericson is from a cultivation place.

"I do not know, I can move if you'd like?" I offered diplomatically even though I knew this generic mob is literally too dumb to understand something like diplomacy.

"No! you shall answer for why it is some metallic-" the npc was cut off by a stern voice coming from the Bar.

"Zheng! Leave them be! They literally just arrived not mere minutes ago!" said the man tending the Bar.

The basic bitch baby baddy now known as Zheng, grumbled and in a huff turned around to where I imagine the front of the tavern is(as I'm currently sat at some window-side eating table).

After observing that white rarity thugs-R-us brand cultivation henchman for a few more seconds, I stand up and walk to the man tending the Bar.

Huh, he reminds me of that one fic, I think I remember glancing at it at one point?

"Grandpa Universe right?" He supplied, after I'm assuming having either read my face or my mind.

"I haven't read it, but you look very similar to the-" I say but then cut off as he finishes my sentence.

"Old guy on the cover picture, yeah I know, I modeled my current body after that after all." Says GU Bar guy.

"'Current body'?" I question quote at him.

"Yup, counting this one I'd have around 16 active alternative bodies." He says.

"Huh, neat." I dumbly say.

"Yep... So, tell me, how'd you end up here? This part of the tavern is for mystical and spiritual universes, as you probably already surmised from Zheng." GUB guy asks.

"I really do not know, one moment I'm walking home from work, the next I was just staring into an infinite void of nothing." I supplied.

"Hmm, sounds to me you got reincarnated." GUB guy says.

"I dunno, it doesn't exactly feel like reincarnation to me." I share my thoughts.

"Bah, it is so reincarnation, you should see some of the more ridiculous reincarnates they go through some crazy things and end up dead just to wake up in a new body, which is what somewhat happend to you." GUB guy states.

"So, why did I end up here?" I ask the most pressing question on my mind.

"Simple." he says "You preformed a prerequisite in order to get here."

"Which would be what? All I did was just float in an infinite void of darkness and just played video games with myself in my mind." I ask and state.

"Well, exactly that, you faced yourself literally while being untethered from anything, now, that sounds exactly what a cultivation novel would do." GUB guy points out.

"I guess it would, so how do I go to a different place in this tavern?" I ask.

"Well, first off since you got here through the 'cultivators way' you've got some of those restrictions placed on you instead of the ones that would normally be applied to a mechanical ascension visitor." GUB guy says.

"Ok, and what does that mean?" I ask.

"What it means is you're unrestricted on who can visit you, but you are very restricted in where you can go, you are unable to just go into another universe and just live there, but you have free reign on either your home reality, which from what you said is just that void, or here, however due to you not being an actual cultivator and your home dimension is, shall we say, not one you'd want to return to, you may go to one additional place Traverse Town, and before you ask, yes, that Traverse Town from Kingdom Hearts." GUB guy info shovels me.

"Cool, and what would my restrictions be if I got here through the machine way?" I ask.

"If you got here through that way you'd be unable to go anywhere and no one would be allowed to visit you, as you'd possibly be either some super genocidal machine who just blew up their whole galaxy with an Atheric engine, or some fool who decided to upload themselves into becoming a machine only to skip over the step of actually becoming a machine and going straight into becoming a machine god, thus believing everything is a simulation." GUB guy info shovels me again.

"I see, well I am neither, so that's good." I say.

"That is good, it means I won't need to erase your presance here and delete your memories before sending you there as they are basically prisoners because of what they did." GUB guy says with a smirk.

As I am a machine I do not have sweat glands, however with him smirking at me like that I could have sworn I felt cold sweat on my back.

"Anyways, here take this." GUB guy says, and hands me a small tablet, about the same size as an Ipad mini.

"That will allow you to browse not only the Tavern's inventory but also every other shop in Traverse Town, and transport you from here to there." Once more GUB guy info shovels me.

"Thanks." I say, before turning my attention to the tablet.

"No problem, now don't go causing too much trouble!" GUB guy says.

"How much trouble would be too much?" I ask as I'm turning away to head over to Traverse Town, because I don't want to be here any longer than I have to, with now recognizing some of the faces of these cultivators because I glanced at them while scrolling through fanfics to read.

"Oh nothing too bad, just don't go causing a genocide without just cause or attacking unprovoked here in the Tavern and you should be fine." GUB guy says

"Thanks for the heads up!" I say to him as I found the portal option on the tablet.

"Young Master! that's the scrap heap that was sitting in your chair!" Zheng shouted as he was approaching me with some slimy haired anorectic and quite frankly ugly dude.

"You, machine! Prostrate yourself and maybe I will let you off with only having to serve me and my family for a hundred years instead of a thousand!" Cheong the 'young master' says.

Ugh, his voice sounds worse than he looks, I'm not dealing with this.

Time to do the Jostar family secret technique.

"Nigerundayo!" I shout as I open a portal to Traverse Town, leaving the two cultivator piles of steaming shit in the dust, after all, they don't have a tablet from GUB guy, they only have their martial art things and weird chi stuff.

~~~[A/N]~~~

So, that was the first of this little tale, the thought of a guy becoming a machine, and trying to live peacefully only to have it all being interuppted by anime and other characters, was what popped into my head and demanded, nay full on took my thoughts and slammed them over my head saying "Make this into a fic you dumb fck!" and so, here it is, I don't expect I'll end up making more than a few chapters over these few days I am currently away from work.

speaking of, I wrote the other 3 fics cause I had time to kill and ideas just, popped into my head, before I had a job, but during while I was trying to go to collage, however I dropped out of it due to me not being all too bright, so I got a semi decent starter job, paid off the debt, and now here we are, I've worked at the same place for about over a year or so, and I've enjoyed having my own money, now I have some time to kill and well, I've explained it enough, but in closing thoughts a question

What's your favorite kind of power, and how would you imagine implementing it?

Mines the swarmer, doesn't matter what kind of swarm, bees, people, tanks, elemental beings, nukes, just mass amounts of thing A swarming over thing B, something about that just feels, right in a way, like "I know you're so strong and powerful, however I have numbers!"

if you like the story, add it to your library, if you've got thoughts, gifs or memes, just comment them, I'd love to see them.

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