I Am Unloved

[Edward]

"I'm sorry for your loss, Thomen."

A dark-green-haired man patted a grey-haired man's, Thomen Falkrona's shoulder.

Thomen only nodded.

His eyes were fixed on a beautiful black-haired and amber-eyed woman who was enclosed in a glass box. She wore a peaceful smile inside the box. One would wonder whether she was dead or not. She seemed to have just fallen asleep.

The dark-green haired man seemed worried at his close friend's lack of reaction. He glanced at a boy who was also staring at his mother and a conflicted expression appeared on his face.

"Don't you think it should be time to tell Edward about-"

"Draven."

Thomen looked at his friend with empty eyes.

"Edward is our child."

He said in a strong yet low tone.

Only once had he confirmed that Draven wasn't going to do anything stupid had he left to greet the other people coming to give their condolences.

"Sigh…"

Draven Stormdila shook his head and turned toward the most affected ones. The children.

An adorable seven-year-old boy was there with, on either side, two girls. His daughter, Miranda Stormdila and her friend Elona Falkrona, who was also Edward's younger sister, were next to Edward Falkrona.

"Edward, are you okay?"

He looked at his daughter, asking innocently her childhood friend. Edward was the boy she was the closest to. She had never approached any other boy other than Edward. She had already started to scream in both her mansion and Edward's mansion that she would marry Edward later.

As a doting father, Draven was reluctant to give his daughter to any one, but if it was his best friend's son…why not…maybe. Well, there was also the fact that it could be just his daughter's innocent gibberishes. When she grew up, she and Edward would both laugh about that.

It could be that, but Draven knew his daughter.

If their relation continued to be that close for a few more years, there was no doubt for him, that she would fall genuinely for Edward.

Draven wasn't against it.

Edward was a kind and talented boy. He is going to be the next Duke of the Falkrona Duchy and will rule without doubt well.

He could leave his daughter in his capable hands…

Draven thought and looked at Edward.

"..."

Draven couldn't bear to see Edward like that.

His face was devoid of any emotions, any expression.

His previous lively amber eyes were now dark.

He was a stark contrast to his younger sister crying loudly while hugging his arm.

He had the same expression as Thomen seconds ago–at least that was what he wanted to say, but no. Edward's expression was very different. It was darker…

He couldn't recognize Edward.

"Hey, boy."

Draven knelt down before Edward and patted his head, but Edward was still looking at his mother.

"You can cry, you know. Edward…your mother loved you and your sister more than anything."

Draven said and patted the grey-eyed little girl who was looking back at him with puppy eyes when he brought up their mother.

"She will always be with-"

"She didn't love me."

"What..?"

Edward cut him off with a weird tone.

"Edward?"

Miranda tilted her head at Edward's different demeanor.

"I'm unloved."

"Edwar-"

"I'm despised."

"Edward, look at me."

Draven grabbed both Edward's shoulders and made Edward face him.

"No one hates you here. Everyone loves y-"

" 'He' told me."

"Edward?"

"Big Brother?"

Miranda and Elona separated themselves from Edward to look properly at him.

"Why should I give something I would not receive in the future?"

"..."

Draven was speechless.

That face.

That expression.

These tears.

….and that smile.

He would probably never forget that time.

***

'No one loves you.'

'No one likes you'

'Everyone hates you.'

'Everyone wants your death.'

'Don't trust anyone.'

'Do you want to see again?'

"N-No!"

'It's for your sake…and my sake.'

"My-Myra! Lona! Father and moth-"

'They are not your family.'

'You are a mere pawn for the greater good of other selfish people.'

'Do you want to live like this?'

"I-I don't understand…please leave m-me-"

'He will come.'

'Live only for yourself and show them what true entertainment is, Amael.'

"N-No…m-mom, d-dad…"

'Then I will leave.'

"No! Don't leave me here! I beg you! I don't want to see that!"

'I am everything against Eden.'

'You are my hope and I am your'

"Ho-Hope…"

'...utopian ruin.'

'Everything is for my sake and your sake.'

***

"..."

The cold night wind swept my grey hair gently.

I was currently seated on a little grassy hill.

No one was around.

The only source of light was the moon and its rays.

[<Amael? >]

Cleenah called out hesitantly.

"Yeah?"

[<Is it you or-">]

"It's me."

[<That doesn't answer my question.>]

I smiled at her pouting tone.

"Yeah, I am still Nyrel but…"

[<But? >]

"I'm Edward as well…"

I grimaced a little with the flood of memories still invading my brain.

I was still keeping my awareness as Nyrel, but I felt as much as Nyrel as Edward.

The proof of that was I felt stupid to have insulted myself when I 'appeared' in this world.

No, it feels more like I have just recovered the memories of Nyrel from Earth…

Was that a hallucination…?

I am talking about what I witnessed right after my mother's death.

I feel like I talked to someone, he showed me something and I…believed him and changed my way of thinking…at least until now.

With Nyrel's rational mind, I felt more at peace.

Then why do I still hold some hatred toward my sister, foster brother and Miranda…?

It was significantly less than before since I felt the strange urge to see my sister, aunt Belle and Miranda right now, but at the same time, I could never act like before with them.

I was not just Edward. Not just Nyrel either.

I was also not a mere game character.

I felt disgusted and repulsed at that mere idea.

I couldn't accept that I, Nyrel, or Edward, the son of the most powerful Duke, was the creation of someone.

[<So, you are a mix of 'you' that strange manaless world and Amael?>]

"Well, something like that."

[...]

"Jarvis, I know you are hiding something from me."

[...]

"I hope you won't betray your master."

[You are not my master.]

"Yeah! A shitty system though?"

I snapped at this guy, hiding things from the guy renting him.

Slumping on the grass, I sighed.

"Oy, Cleenah."

[<Hm? >]

"You sure hide things from me huh. I thought only Jarvis was doing that with me."

I said with a snort.

[<W-What are you talking about?>]

"Stuttering shamelessly and you want me to believe you?"

[<What…? >]

"Since when are two other people renting for free inside me?"

[

"Cleenah."

[<You feel them…?>]

"Yeah, after getting my memories back. My senses became sharper. Then will you explain to me what the hell is happening inside my…freaking body?!"

[<W-Well, actually, when you did the death pact, I wasn't only God answering your call…>]

What?!

Wait!

"That's why I suffered more than 'Edward' in the game? In the game, it wasn't like that and I got only one God…"

What the hell was happening…?

Could it be that guy from Tokyo who did something?

No.

When I did the death pact, it was with Ante-Eden and I just diverted from the plot so it was possible.

But still two other Gods.

I smiled.

"Tell them to not shy away anymore and gimme their power."

[<Pffftt! >]

"..."

Why was she laughing again?!

"Finished?"

I asked, since it was freaking two minutes she was laughing hard!

It was ringing inside my head like an alarm.

[<Ahaha- ah…hum. I'm sorry.>]

"Can the jobless Goddess tell me why she has laughed so much?"

[<I'm not jobless! I gave you my power! Ungrateful man!>]

"Yeah, but you are still jobless inside me. Now tell me."

I gave her a random reason and hurried her.

[<Simple. They don't care about you!>]

They don't care about me?

"Then why the heck are they inside me? Tell them to get out."

[<Unfortunately I cannot do that. They have already made a death pact with you after all.>]

"..."

[<They'd rather be in a walking prison than motionless one like that temple. You understand now why they chose to accept you.>]

"No, I freaking don't understand!"

I spat angrily and stood up.

I thought, with three gods, I could maybe catch up with the Edward of the game, but figures no.

Those two Gods were there with me for a month but didn't even bother to speak or to help me. What was that?

"They should be grateful and help me a thousand of times."

[That sounds like the line a young master would say.]

"Shut up!"

I snarled and covered my face again.

[<Where are you going?>]

Cleenah asked.

"Buying a gift for my aunt."

I took out the receipt and smiled, seeing the money I had.

[200 ED]

It was enough.

I will buy some new clothes and a gift for her before going back.

[<You really aren't the same guy anymore…Until now you avoided speaking about them like your family.>]

"Well, yeah…"

But Belle has always been kind to me.

Memories of her playing with me when I was a kid are fresh in my mind.

Before, she'd always come to visit me, but then mother died and I don't know why…

Speaking of mother…

No, my mother and father.

Something seemed out of the place to me but I couldn't put my finger on it.

Oh, yeah, I should check out that while I am at it.

"Jarvis, my profile."

[Edward Amael Falkrona] [16]

[3rd Ascension]

[Charm: 19]

[Affection Points: 10]

[Falkrona Bloodline~1st Wing~]

[Vysindra's Oath~1st Ring~]

[Spirit Lord~1st Anima's Core~]

[???]

There were sure some changes.

First and more importantly, my charm was raised from one point. One more point and I could be considered average.

I nodded my head in satisfaction.

Next, was Vysindra's oath.

I unlocked the first ring, which meant…

I snapped my fingers and a burning bracelet coiled around my right wrist. The obscure purple fire was already taking a toll on me, even more with my tired body, so I canceled immediately. But I felt significantly better at using it.

[<That fire is really dangerous…>]

"You already said it ten times this month."

Was she that worried about that?

It was taking a toll on my body, but nothing surprising.

I mean the protagonist was having a hard time as well with his bloodline elemental.

[<It's not about that. That fire is good for your mind and body.>]

"Don't fret over it. Look, I've got your power unlocked."

I pointed at the power I obtained thanks to Cleenah.

[Spirit Lord~1st Anima's Core~]

What does Anima's core mean, though?

[<It's your control over banshees. The more you have 'Core', the stronger banshees and number can have. Your contracted spirits are growing with you. But remember Amael, they not dead anymore. They came back to life. It's just that don't a true body.>]

"Mary."

A black light shone before me and the familiar girl appeared.

Still with the same emotionless face that I had seen in the coffin and when I summoned her.

"Do you remember me?"

Mary just nodded her head at my question.

"How so?"

I wanted to know the limits of the 'illusionary' time travel, since I hadn't really time-traveled. It was like sending a dream of me to the 'past Mary' or a hallucination if you preferred to calm her in her last moments. If Mary hadn't gained enough trust during the few days she 'hallucinated' of me, then I wouldn't have been able to contract her but here she was.

Still, the fact that I was able to communicate with her in the past was amazing. I have to agree that Cleenah's power was powerful.

"I…don't know how but…you were with me…when I was…"

I smiled and hugged her gently.

Since we were contracted, some of our feelings were connected.

I know what she felt inside that enclosed space, buried six feet under the ground.

Mary's cold body shivered at my sudden warm hug.

I patted her disheveled black hair until she relaxed a little.

She wasn't and couldn't be that joyful girl anymore, but at least she would be able to discover the world as she wished, though it would be at my side.

"You should tie your hair a little, don't you think so?"

Though I said that in a gentle tone, I was scared of her dark face.

With her black hair covering half of her face, she looked like those ghost women in horror movies I've seen.

Mary touched her black hair without showing too much emotion but my words seemed to have gone through her, it's all that mattered.

"I will buy some clothes for you as well while I am at it."

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A long chapter! Hope you liked it!

The next one, the last one before the Academy starts so the GAMESTORY starts will be also fairly long like this one.

I count on your support guys! With Powerstones and Reviews! Thanks!

PS: I might upload the last chapter of the Volume, in few hours but I'm not sure. I would like to start the Academy Volume Monday, I will try it 🙂