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Chapter One Hundred and Ninety Seven

It was difficult for Penny to imagine Jeremy as he would be when he came into the flat this evening. She had only her memories of what he used to be and his voice, his calls, his texts... Those long, descriptive but heartbreakingly impersonal texts of his from which to draw her picture. With soul searing honesty, she forced herself to realize that Jeremy's life in Cairo was by no means a parallelism of her own. Having a baby was perhaps one of the biggest and most wonderful experience in a woman's life. Having an illegitimate baby particularly taught one a lesson. But she could not make herself believe that the gay, social round of parties Jeremy had described would have taught him anything. Worse, it had no doubt increased his passion for youth, his desire for fun, his irresponsibility.