CHAPTER 5

Disclaimer: The content below contains a description of sexual abuse reader's discretion is advised.

Juliana' pov

"Juliana I have already told you a million times that you look stunning so please stop worrying," Maggie tells me, sounding frustrated.

She has been acting kind of weird since Monday when I told her Marcus's full name and that he was taking me on a date.

Maybe she is just worried about me, because of what happened the last time I got close to someone. I am sure she will be okay once she realizes that Marcus is a good person.

I have been nervous since morning and there is nothing I can do to stop my nerves. This is the first time in a long time that I am going on a date with a guy I like.

My date with Mike doesn't count, I mean Mike is good looking but he does not move me the way Marcus does. The last time I felt this way was three years ago and it ended in tears. But this is not a time to think about my past. I need to let go of my past and start living again.

As we wait for Marcus to arrive, Maggie continues to fidget and check her phone continuously. I can tell she is not herself, but I am not going to push her to tell me what's wrong with her. I can't shake the feeling that Maggie's strange behavior has something to do with Marcus. I try to push the thought out of my head, but it lingers there, bothering me. I can't help but wonder what is going on with Maggie and if it is somehow related to Macurs, I hope she tells me about it. 

I look at her and she smiles at me. Maybe I am just overthinking and her behavior has nothing to do with Marcus.

Today I am going to face my fears and try to live a little. I just hope he likes what I am wearing. I don't know if what I am wearing is good enough for a man like him. The man is like a ghost, there is nothing about him on the internet except that he is a millionaire. I wanted to find out something about him before our date but the search was fruitless.

It's like he doesn't have a social life. I just hope he won't be talking about himself the whole night like Mike because that would be a turn-off. My thoughts are interrupted by the ringing of our bell. That must be him, he insisted on picking me up tonight.

"Well, It's time for me to find out what tonight has in store for me," I say, picking up my purse.

"You will do just fine Julie, just stop overthinking and take a deep breath."

Maggie's words do help calm me down a little bit. I take a deep breath and remind myself that I deserve to be happy and to let myself enjoy my date with Marcus.

"Thanks, Maggie. I appreciate your support," I say, giving her a grateful smile. She nods, still looking a bit tense, but she hugs me.

"I can do this" is the mantra in my head as I open the door. I think I might have forgotten how good-looking Marcus is. I freeze the moment I open the door, my mouth is open but nothing comes out.

"Good evening I am Maggie, Juliana's best friend, and roommate, it's nice to finally meet you," Maggie says, stretching her hand to him for a handshake.

I don't know if I am imagining things but I think Maggie just winked at Marcus

"The pleasure is all mine Maggie," Marcus says, shaking Maggie's hand. And then turns to me with a smile on his face.

Oh my goodness I don't know how I am going to survive the night.

"Hey Marcus," I manage to say.

"Hello, babydoll I brought you these." He says handing me the bouquet of lilies, my favorite flowers.

"Thank you so much, they are beautiful." The only answer he gives me is a smile.

He asked me about my favorite flowers this morning but I didn't know he was going to get them for me. Our fingers touch as I get the flowers. I feel fireworks going off all over my body. I give Maggie the flowers and smile at the god of a man standing in front of me.

"Ready to go babydoll." my knees go weak just by him calling me babydoll, and when he kisses the back of my hand I feel like fainting. I don't understand why a simple kiss can turn me into a horny mess.

"Ye...yes...sure" I manage to stutter. He offers his hand for me to take and leads me to his vehicle. He opens the car door for me, goes to the other side, and gets in. He introduces me to his driver Eric, I can tell that their relationship is more than just employer and employee by the way they are talking to each other.

"You look beautiful tonight babydoll," he says, holding my hand.

"You...you look nice too." he looks more than nice. He looks like a model on a magazine cover.

"So, Juliana, how was your day?" what I want to say is that I did nothing but worry about this date the whole morning and afternoon, Instead I smile and said;

" It was great."

"Anything interesting?" he asks, looking at me. I know he wants to know if I touched myself or not. I don't know how l am going to survive the night with him looking at me like that.

"Nothing, I just spent it with Maggie catching up on things." What I don't tell him is that the only thing we were catching up on was him.

"It must be interesting to have someone close to you to talk about certain things with."

"It is nice, I am sure you also have someone you tell things to?" 

"I do have my best friends, they are more like brothers than friends." I can tell by the smile on his face that he is fond of them.

 We continue our ride in continuous silence. Not the awkward one but the peaceful one. The driver pulls over at an Italian restaurant.

Marcus gets out and opens the door for me, offering me his hand again. He leads us to a table at the far end.

"I booked us a table three days ago, so we won't be disturbed until we are done," Marcus says, pulling a chair for me. I thank him for the chair and sit down.

A few minutes later a waiter comes to collect our order. Marcus tells him to bring us a bottle of wine as we wait for our order. The waiter brings the wine after a few minutes. Marcus pours me a glass and then pours one for himself too. The wine tastes really good.

"Do you like it?" He asks me.

"Yes, it tastes amazing." We continue drinking our wine in silence.

"Are you always this quiet?" Marcus asks me after a few minutes.

"No, I talk when someone engages me in a conversation," I answer looking at him.

"Mmmm, I see," he says, chuckling.

Wow, everything about this man is charming, I can't help but wonder how it would feel to swallow that chuckle. If only it could be that simple without my demons haunting me.

"Don't do that," Marcus says with a strange look in his eyes.

"Do what?" I ask, confused about the change in his behavior.

"Don't bite Your lip like that babydoll, I might start thinking about ways to stop you from biting it, or maybe make you suck on something," he says looking at me.

I don't realize I am biting my lip until he mentions it. What does he mean by making me suck on something? I hope he doesn't mean what I think. And then he continues;

"Don't open your mouth like that either, you are giving me ideas. And believe me, babydoll you have no idea what's going through my mind right now, and if you don't close your mouth I will be tempted to put something in it."

I just let go of my lip when he told me not to bite it, not knowing I was making another mistake by leaving my mouth open.

I try to say something but fail, I am the one he's giving ideas right now. I start picturing myself with different things between my lips. My thoughts are interrupted by the clicking of heels.

"Good evening Mr. Mwale, how is the evening?" greets a young woman in a tight navy blue dress. She doesn't look like a waitress but someone in a higher position.

"The evening is going fine, thank you for asking." The way Marcus is answering this woman seems like they have a history.

I think he reads the expression on my face because he introduces us after a short awkward silence.

"Juliana, this is Cindy, my friend's cousin. She is the manager here." No wonder she was walking like she owned the place.

"Cindy, this is Juliana, my woman." I choke on my wine the moment he says his woman.

I get that he does not like this woman but using me as a tool is not cool. I watch the woman's smile Drop for a moment, but she manages to pull herself together.

"Nice to meet you, Juliana," she says with a fake smile on her face.

"Likewise,"

"Okay, Marcus I will see you around, and if any of the workers here give you a bad time let me know." She says going back to wherever she came from.

"Why did you lie to her?" I ask him.

"I did not lie to her, I have every intention of making you my woman" I don't know how to respond to that statement.

"Is she your ex-girlfriend?" My mouth let that out before my brain could process it.

"Is someone jealous?" he asks, chuckling.

"No, I just want to know." That's not entirely true but I don't say anything more.

"Cindy and I had a thing a while back when I was in a dark place," he says, a little bit sad.

"Okay," I mumble. 

"Tell me, Juliana, how long have you been friends with Maggie?"

"Maggie and I have been friends since secondary school."

"She seems like a good friend."

"She is." Maggie is the only person who sticks around me no matter what.

We stay quiet for a while just staring at each other as we continue drinking the wine.

"I like you and I want you in every way, I want every part of you, I want to worship every inch of your body," he says looking into my eyes.

I don't say a word for a while and then I ask him the question that has been in my head the whole week.

"Why did you follow me last week?"

"Is it not obvious? I want you, Juliana. I have wanted you from the moment you entered the restaurant."

I have never been on a date with someone this confident, I don't know if it's because of his age or if he is just confident.

"I don't know what to say about that," I tell him. which is true because I don't know what I want.

We continue to ask each other about our likes and dislikes. It turns out my sexy stranger is scared of frogs. I can't help but laugh at him.

We start talking about our jobs and our plans for the future. I feel comfortable and relaxed in Marcus' presence. The food arrives, we enjoy our meal, and continue our conversation. I realize that I am genuinely enjoying my time with Marcus. We chat about everything and anything as we eat our delicious Italian meal. Marcus tells me about his love for Italian cuisine and how he learned to appreciate it during his travels in Italy. I tell him about my interest in traveling.

By the time we are through with the desert, I know more about Marcus. But I feel like he is holding back something, but I don't press him for answers.

After finishing our meal, Marcus pays the bill and we step out of the restaurant. The night has been perfect so far. The night sky is clear and the stars glow above us. Marcus looks at me with a smile and asks, "Would you like to go for a walk?"

I nod with a smile and we start walking hand in hand. The night breeze brushes against our faces. We walk for a few minutes in a comfortable silence. Marcus stops as we turn around to go back to the restaurant where his vehicle is packed. "I have enjoyed our time together tonight. I feel a strong connection with you and I want to see where this can go. Would you like to go on another date with me?"

I feel my heart flutter with excitement and Happiness. "Yes, I would love to go on another date with you." He smiles at me and I can see the happiness written all over his face.

"This is nice, I had fun," Marcus says, holding my hand as we make our way to the parking lot.

"I had fun too," I say looking at him.

When we reach where Marcus's car is parked he presses me to it holding my face.

I almost lose my mind when I see the look on his face. It's filled with admiration. I am looking forward to feeling his lips on mine, but when he does put them on me everything in me freezes.

I am taken back to three years ago in Daniel's room, him pressing me on the wall and forcing his tongue in my mouth, as he rips the dress off my body and tells me that I belong to him.  I try to push him but he's too strong. l feel his breath on my neck as he forces himself on me.

I am brought back to reality by someone shaking me and calling my name. Marcus is looking at me with so much confusion and worry in his eyes. But I can't stop my fear.

I am so stupid how could I have thought that everything was fine and that the past wouldn't come haunting me? I should have just stayed at home.