ONE

I stood there in front of my doorstep with a suitcase, a cabin bag and my tote bag hanging low and heavy as I pushed back all the thoughts and feelings I didn't want to confront. I'd waited for this moment forever because it was one step closer to my all-time dream – The Netherlands. Never did it matter what I did there; all I ever cared about was being there. And starting college was the step that always felt the closest to my dream.

But it was hitting in. Finally. People told me it would hit me in the right moment – in the moment leaving home would become a thing of the present, but I never paid heed. I guess I should've, because right now, I felt like shit and the worst part of it all was the fact that I didn't have a single clue as to what to do and how to feel better.

Dad was backing the car out the garage, Mamma was packing dry fruits for me in the kitchen and Ethan was getting ready in his room. I was finally starting college in like two hours, but this wasn't the exact way I had imagined. All the excitement seemed to be nowhere. In fact, right this moment, I found it hard to look back even for a second because I'd end up doing the inevitable and it was honestly the last thing I wanted to do.

My dilemma felt very, very, convoluted because even though I felt like crap, I wanted to feel the absolute opposite. It was tiring to even think about it because I knew that, either way, I'd feel guilty. But I couldn't deny one thing - that was for sure.

I was going to miss a lot of things here, things that had once annoyed and irritated me. I guess goodbyes can make you miss those things you once thought would be better if they were gone. I didn't mean like it was a permanent goodbye or something like that, but it was a goodbye to the place I call home. And it was a goodbye to that home for the first time in my life.

As I lost myself in my melancholic thoughts, a honk brought me back to reality. Looking to my left, I saw Dad waiting, signaling me to bring all my packed stuff to the car. Forcing myself to snap out of my thoughts, I started moving towards him. Besides, it was a good distraction.

I walked down the pavement in front of my house and reached the car. Opening the trunk, I started loading my things in. Dad came out of the car to help me. As he loaded the last of it, he said, "Honey, come on. Don't ruin your mood because of a couple of months. You will be back in no time."

Startled, I asked, "What do you mean?" I didn't want to admit it right away because I was scared that I would just end up crying.

"Are you seriously going to act clueless?" There was a calming comfort in his eyes that kept me on the ground. It was relieving to know that my father could see right through me. I gave him a surrendered smile before he hugged me lovingly - a long, tight one which seemed to say, 'You will be just fine'. Pulling away from the hug, he gave me a warm smile and held both of my shoulders as he reassured me, "Summer, you've got this."

I sighed. There was so much confidence and belief in his eyes. I felt the hollowness and my quandary draining out of me as certainty took over. I searched for any clues or hints that could prove to me that he had just said it to comfort me, but I found nothing - just pure honesty and faith.

"Thanks, Dad," I said, with another smile. Not for his advice, but for him.

"I didn't do anything. It's you that made yourself believe that you can do this. But now, run inside and call your mother and your brother. We are running late. Virginia is two hours away and we have to reach there by two O'clock latest."

I nodded, smiling widely. I sprinted back, the air around me caressing my cheek as I felt a sense of closure. Everything vanished when I saw my brother dearest in the living room on his phone, not paying any heed to anything. I rolled my eyes.

"Ethan please get up and go to the car. Dad is waiting. We are running late." I spoke. He didn't reply, of course, it was not surprising at all. Rolling my eyes again, I turned back to call mom when I saw his still-not-touched breakfast. "Ethan? You still didn't eat your breakfast?!" He still didn't reply. He didn't even look up.

"FOR GOD'S SAKE REPLY! ARE YOU DEAF?!" My annoyance peaked now.

"What. Do. You. Want?" He answered, a minute later and finally looking up from his stupid phone. I glared at him angrily.

"Yeah, keep on glaring. You look bad anyways," This was our usual routine by the way.

"Oh, so you heard what I said. I am so surprised! I am going to put this in the newspaper whenever I come back that Ethan finally heard what I said."

"I heard everything that you said, okay? It's just that I think answering your 24/7 blah blah blah isn't a useful thing. You know, saving my energy." He emphasized on "my energy" a lot more to piss me off more. I folded my arms and kept on glaring at him angrily as he rolled his eyes at my reaction.

"Now what happened?" Mamma said, coming out of her room. We both looked at her. "The same old one. Your daughter shouting at me for useless things," Ethan answered immediately, again back to his phone and rolling his eyes. I cringed at it; he looked really bad doing that. I whispered an 'ew' under my breath, but it was not like I was scared for him to listen.

"Yeah right, telling him to hurry up and getting angry at him for still not eating his breakfast is useless, right?" I defended myself, still looking at him. "And besides, don't roll your eyes because you look bad. As usual." This time, I emphasized on 'as usual'. He frowned at my insult before looking at me and narrowing his eyes.

"You look worse," I added, laughing in an evil way. "And your witch laugh is disgusting." He commented back. "Stop it, you both," Mamma cut us off. "Ethan, will you ever take anything seriously? We are running late and if you don't eat your breakfast in like five minutes, you are staying back."

That did its work. "Fine okay," He answered, traces of annoyance in his tone. I victoriously smirked and chuckled softly, but loud enough for him to hear. He looked back at me and frowned to which I raised my eyebrows, smiling evilly. He didn't retaliate.

I won. Walking up to the dining table, he started eating his breakfast. I walked up to the fridge to pack some sodas when Mamma called us out from the door. "Summer, wait for your brother and come together. You two better hurry. It's already late. Lock the house after you."

"Sure!" I answered. I packed three to four cans of soda in a paper bag that I found in one of the cupboards. I looked over to check if he was done or not. His eyes were still glued to his phone, but he was eating too, so there was progress at least. It was all boring waiting for him until I heard the sound of a text. As far as I knew him, he rarely talked over text; it was always calls or nothing.

"Who are you talking to? Psycho Chloe?" I teased him.

"I have told you so many times that we broke up."

"Yeah, I know. I just didn't believe she let you go. She was so in love with you,"

"Please, I was never serious with her to begin with and she being in love with me sounds like a joke," He chuckled. "She was hooking up with the entire baseball team so yeah." There was no trace of sadness or hesitation on his part.

"Oh dang, harsh. Glad she is gone; she was a bitch anyways." He didn't reply and ignored me again.

I sat down on one of the chairs and opened an extra can when he suddenly looked at me and said, "You know what, I'm seeing someone."

I felt my eyes widen as my chin dropped open so wide. "WHO?!"

"Calm down dumbass. Her name is Evelyn; she lives three blocks away, moved in three weeks back from Philly. I've had my eyes on her since like the first day."

"Is she a witch too, just like your previous groupies?"

"Shut up," He answered. "She is just so… nice and kind to everyone. Doesn't feel the need to fake and even stood up for the boy who everyone bullies for his weight. I was so impressed. I started liking her since then." He had gotten all shy now.

"Damn! My brother is serious with a girl?" I leaned back and smiled. "That sounds almost impossible. I'm sure she is something."

"She is," He assured, blushing and still eating.

"Tell me more." I said, putting my elbows on the dining table.

"Not now, I'll tell you in the car. If I continue now, I am not sure I will be alive to be with her." He pursed his lips, and I knew exactly what he meant.

"Okay, I get it. But I should be the first one to know if something ever happens." I pointed my index finger at him, giving him a glare.

"Geez, okay fine, now let's move. I don't want to die." He got up, keeping the empty plate in the sink. I nodded happily.

We fought a lot, precisely at least five times a day. But sometimes, we got along just fine, just like now. It was a sibling thing; we never felt the need to apologize because deep down, our fights never affected us. We knew we got each other's back, always. And that, that was enough.