Chapter 35: Conflicted feelings

(AN: This chapter will have heavy drama and XX scenes, so read at your own risk.)

(Titus's (Takeru) POV)

You might be wondering if I knew about Tamamo's awakening, but the answer is I didn't. I could have avoided a direct contract, but I wasn't expecting Tamamo to partially awaken her divine origin. Though I still didn't see ears and tails, I guess it was just a matter of time.

I was still shocked to see her sprinting at lightning speed. Her clothes were also ripped from that dash. Not to mention her inhuman strength. To block that kind of attack, a person had to be a muscular tank warrior, unlike a woman in her teens.

However, now that I think about it, my luck might be working. I rubbed my clothes and calmly rose.

"T-Takeru-sama…?" Tamamo was confused by my unfazed demeanor, but I didn't mind. She then shook her head and pleaded, "Please move!"

The Oni was ready for another attack and would strike at any given moment. Since I didn't move, Tamamo bit her lips and took a position to block the next attack, too. How lovely~!

However, I walked past her while manifesting a spear from my inventory. I didn't even look at Oni since my eyes were locked on Tamamo, and I swung my spear. In the next moment, the Oni stopped moving, and what followed was a scene where the Oni's head fell on the ground, followed by a fountain of blood, and then his body fell backward.

I also firmly blocked the splash of Oni blood by timely taking out an umbrella. On the other hand, Tamamo was stunned. She looked at me, then at the slayed Oni, and again looked at me before her jaws dropped.

I chuckled. She looked so silly doing so. Anyway, now that there was no hurdle, I decided to strike up the conversation.

"My, my~! I wasn't expecting a fine lady such as you to portray such strength." I smirked as I walked closer.

"W-What are you saying, haha? That was a weak creature. Anyone could have stopped it." Tamamo stuttered and then pointed at her horse, "W-we should get going? His majesty might be waiting."

Before she could finish her sentence, I wrapped my arm around her waist and pressed her against my body. I then lifted her chin and glared intensively into her eyes.

"His majesty this, his majesty that! Forget him now and tell me why the hell you were avoiding me. Do you think I am a joke to you??"I interrogated her sternly.

"T-Takeru-sama…?" Her eyes wavered, confused and also kind of scared. "Please listen to me."

"What do you have to say, huh? You kissed me after getting rejected from that old fart. You came with me, knowing that I have feelings for you. We had such a great time. But next, after getting some cheap gifts from that man, you started avoiding me! Do you think I am some kind of disposable toy that you would toss aside after using me??"My voice intensified.

"P-Please stop… I am sorry….!" Tamamo pleaded, a tear escaping from her eyes. However, she didn't receive any mercy.

"Fine!" I said that and released her. But then I grabbed the collars of her kimono and tugged them down. In the next second, her big, bountiful breasts burst out.

'My god, they are fine.' I glanced at her naked chest for the first time and was stunned. They were so balanced but jiggly that they even made the sound of liquid in them. They turned me on. I started to feel the same sensation that I once felt with Nero's body.

With her silky pink hair billowing in the air, Tamamo was so enchanting that I forgot about everything else.

"Wha!" Tamamo turned red as soon as her kimono loosened. She tried to hide them, but her tits were too big to cover with her hands alone.

I then took her in my arms again. With her on my right arm, I lifted her breast with my left hand and squeezed it.

"An~!" Tamamo released a soft moan and then looked at me and said, "Please stop!" She moaned again when I pinched her nipple. Unlike Nero's average and labeled breasts, Tamamo's boobs were soft like those of a proper lady. They were also warm and tender. But the more I squeezed them, the more it turned me on.

"Since you don't speak a human language, let my lust talk." With those words, I sealed her lips.

I felt the same flowery sensation on my lips. However, unlike before, I was dominant. It was not a tender kiss. It was a flat-out smooch as I opened her mouth and inserted my tongue in it.

On the other hand, Tamamo was trying to resist but barely putting up strength. She tried to remove my hand from her breast but merely rubbed my wrist. She also wanted to push me away, but there was no veil.

But when I saw tears streaming from her eyes, a stretching pain gripped my chest. I released her with a stern gaze.

"What is your problem?!" I couldn't think of any reason for her resistance. No, I couldn't think of anything. My mind was clouded with sheer anger. "Let's see how you react to this!"

In the next scene, I looked at her breast and sealed my lips on her nipples. On that sudden touch, Tamamo widened her eyes and released a loud moan.

My other hand also slipped down her body before it reached the forbidden part of a woman. Tamamo snapped her eyes wide when my fingers touched the bud and then went inside a little. I got confused since she was unusually tight for a 'married woman'.

However, before I could explore more, Tamamo's eyes busted red, enraged, "ENOUGH!"

I couldn't see what happened, but I flew quite a distance. In the next moment, I saw Tamamo lending on my belly. She avoided direct contact and didn't hurt me, but her eyes were still red. Her eye pupils were vertical, like those of a predator.

She grabbed my neck and raised her other hand with sharp nails like a dagger. I could also see her canine teeth, but the more horrifying thing was her sheer aura. The air around me was turning hot. For a moment, I even forgot to breathe, but then I retained my composure.

"Why?! Why are you so horrible to me? I trusted you as my friend! I cared for you, but you betrayed me!" Tamamo roared, threatening me with her tone, but her eyes kept leaking tears, dropping on my face. But I remained unfazed.

"Betrayed?" My eyes twitched. "It was clear from day one that I was in love with you. I approached you gently and never took the path of lust. Yet you used me for comfort and then started avoiding me. Tell me something, Lady Tamamo-no-Mae; don't I even deserve a single answer? Reject me right now, and I won't ever appear in front of you!!" When I screamed, she snapped and was taken aback.

"Ghah…" She bit her lips but didn't answer.

"Fine then." I held her hand, pointing at me, and brought it closer to my neck. Her nails cut my skin, and blood drops started streaming. "End me right here."

"?" Tamamo hesitated and tried to retrieve her claws, but I didn't let her.

"If you hate me so much, then just close the picture right here!" I said, then grinned, "Since the person I decided to love wants me dead, then so be it. Let's just get done with this unnecessary drama."

"No…" She pulled her hand back and averted her gaze.

I raise my brow, utterly confused and disgusted. "What's the matter? Why the change of thoughts? Tamamo-no-Mae, don't think that I would give up on you without an answer. I am warning you, things will never go back."

I asked, but she didn't reply. She was silent as if she didn't want to answer. I sighed and then pointed my palm at her chest. Tamamo got confused until the air started to distort. In the next moment, Tamamo was knocked into the air.

[Force Control A is used.]

I ignored my skill notification as I slowly got up and started walking towards the pink head, who, after flailing on the dirt, was coughing heavily.

I stopped before her and looked at her. I spoke. "Me or that fat old pig? Chose one."

I asked, but Tamamo didn't answer. She only looked at me with rejection, confusion, and horror but never dared to answer.

I then lifted my leg and kicked her in the gut.

"GA!" Tamamo groaned with pain and started trembling while holding her belly. A form was forming in her mouth, and while covered in dirt and naked, she looked so rejected.

But I didn't show any mercy. I crouched down and lifted her head by her hair. "In a few days, I will come to your chamber. I will first 'talk' you, since you are 'that' kind of woman, then take you away from there. Don't you dare deploy those maids, or else everyone will die."

With those words, I left the area. It was time to end things with her.

---

(3rd person's POV)

In front of a mirror, a beautiful maiden was sitting while applying some makeup. Her hair was down, some tied with an attractive clip. She was also wearing a beautiful sea-blue yukata. Anyone could tell from the fabric that only selected individuals could afford some premium material.

"…" Tamamo released a faint smile, satisfied with her makeup. Anyone could fall head over heels for a beauty like her. They would even spend their entire fortune to just meet her. However, upon closer look, they would also notice how lifeless her eyes look.

It was supposed to be a 'special' day, and she was supposed to be happy, but the joy and the happiness were nowhere to be seen.

"It looks like the maiden is supposed to see someone."

!!

Startled, Tamamo turned around and saw a figure in black. It was her 'friend' Takeru. He was wearing some kind of pure dark outfit. She didn't understand how he was able to keep sneaking into her room without anyone noticing. Come to think of it, he was very mysterious.

A couple of days ago, he beheaded an Oni so effortlessly that even a skilled warrior would be ashamed to stand in his presence. He also materialized that spear and umbrella out of thin air. And lastly, he used to push her away. In short, she didn't know anything about that man.

"Go to bed." Takeru said it with folded arms.

After a silent wait, she moved to the futon and lay straight. Takeru approached her and started undressing her. He effortlessly removed the belt that released her yukata. He then grabbed the ends of the robes and flung them open. She was now naked. Takeru also didn't forget to remove the clips and needles from her hair, untying them. It took her hours to dress; Takeru just took a couple seconds to undo all of that.

She pursed her lips. She had never wanted a guy to toy with her body, but guilt and hopelessness prevented her from acting. The Takeru she was previously friends with was different from the Takeru she is now. Whatever he did at this time, she would simply forget about it, like a nightmare.

He then gently sat on top of her and started kissing her neck. When his lips touched her body, she felt an irresistible urge to moan, but she prevented him from making any sound. The same could be said when he touched her breast. But unlike last time, he was stroking her breasts very gently. Those touches sent a surge of new energy to her body.

'Is this really his first time touching a woman, or is he just that good? No, what the hell am I thinking? She thought that she would treat this moment as a dream, but his movements made her rethink otherwise. She felt a foreign pleasure she had never felt before.

He then rose, and their eyes met. When Tamamo saw his eyes, she saw the true man: 'This isn't like him.'

She saw pain, anger, and disgust in his eyes. Pain that he was forcing himself. Angry that the relationship he wanted wasn't working out. He was disgusted with himself for the type of person he had become. At that moment, Tamamo realized that this wasn't a dream and that someone was going to destroy him.

Tamamo snapped and then looked at Takeru. There, she saw his eyes, warm but also lifeless. He was enjoying basking in pleasure, but at the same time, he was also losing himself.

At that moment, the time she spent with Takeru started projecting in front of her. The time when she used to see him playing with kids. Times when he helped the poor. Times when he discharged his responsibilities without any error. And finally, she spent time with him. In that sight, Takeru was a genuine and loving person.

It was Takeru she fell in love with.

Now, seeing his hopeless eyes, Tamamo felt pain. She stopped feeling any pleasure from Takeru's strikes. She just felt guilty that she was deceiving such a caring person.

'I need to stop him.' Tamamo resolved herself. She might be a hopeless woman, but she couldn't let him fall into the pit. She stopped feeling any currents from Takeru's strikes as she gradually rose and started stroking his hair. She then smiled and said, "Takeru-sama, please stop hurting yourself."

The said person stopped moving before Tamamo slowly lifted his head and gently caressed his cheeks.

"Takeru-sama, do you... do you actually love me?" Tamamo hesitated for a second but asked anyway.

"No." Takeru replied without a second thought.

"That's a lie, right?"

"That's true. I don't love you. I truly don't." Takeru answered yet again firmly.

Tamamo smiled and tilted her head. "You do like me, but it seems like Takeru-sama is hiding something."

"If you can understand this, then why ask?" At this moment, his eyes stood, glaring at Tamamo. "Are you making fun of me?"

Tamamo shook her head. "I am just ascertaining my resolve. As for my answer, I am now in love with Takeru-sama."

"What the hell? What are you trying to get??"Takeru inquired.

"Takeru-sama, I love you, but not like this." Tamamo said, "You are a very kind person with a sense of care. I have fallen in love with Takeru-sama. Right now, you are not true to yourself."

"Is that so~?" Takeru passed a fake smile. "Then why don't you drop your BS and come with me? I will become that kind person again."

"But then Takeru-sama, you will hate me," Tamamo said, unfazed by Takeru's intimidating eyes. "Because a kind person like you won't love an unfaithful woman like me. By eloping with you, I will be betraying his majesty."

"What?"

"Yes," Tamamo continued, "His majesty the Emperor was the first person who acknowledged me, a simple village girl. He gifted me wealth and recognition that I never dreamed of, but most importantly, he provided me with love and care that no one ever did. Sure, he didn't propose marriage formally, but I didn't have any other reason to betray him."

"Are you done babbling?" Takeru said and then slapped away Tamamo's hands. "His majesty this, his majesty that? Do you think I enjoy forcing you to do this? Do you have any idea how annoying you sound when you mention his name?" At that moment, Tamamo saw his eyes numb. "Do you have any idea when I see you going to that man's room knowing what you would be doing?"

Tamamo lowered her head with shame. She realized how hard it would be to hear her talk about another man. It would have been another matter if she were the emperor's legal wife, but the truth was far from that. What's more, she played with Takeru's feelings too. However, it was not a good time to reflect on her mistake.

"That's right, I am a lose woman." She said, then looked into his eyes, "But even then, I don't have any reason to betray him. He will hold a marriage ceremony soon, so I won't be a 'lover' anymore."

"You are mistaken about something here. Marriage holds no value if you aren't even sincere with your body in the first place. Well, people like you won't understand anyway." Takeru said, then stood and walked towards the balcony. But before he was about to leave, he spoke, "Fine then. Since you are persistent in staying with that old fart, I won't pursue you, but know that I am the only one aware of your real identity. And when they will see the real Tamamo-no-Mae, those who loved you will betray you in the next moment."

With those words, Takeru disappeared in a blink of an eye. Seriously, though, how does he do that?

Knock! Knock!

Tamamo then snapped at a knock on her door. From the shadow on the door, it was a maid. "Lady Tamamo, his majesty will be waiting for you."

It was then that Tamamo recalled Takeru's sentence. He was right; what right would marriage even hold if she were doing the act already? She always called herself 'a wife', but all the 'love' was naught but for pleasure. She wasn't even thinking of creating a family.

"Give my excuse to his majesty that I am not feeling well. It is 'that' time." Tamamo made an excuse. It was the first time she would be lying to him.

The maid nodded and left the room.

Tamamo took a deep breath and sighed. It was finally over. However, she began trembling the next second.

'Come to think of it, what did he mean by knowing true me?'

She recalled the memory of the festival. Her supernatural strength, her way of making a claw and how inhuman she acted. She never recalled those memories, but her fear resurfaced.

'No, I won't be betrayed. I won't be betrayed.' That night, she lied to herself.

---

(Titus's (Takeru) POV)

'Sigh~! What was I doing?' I realized Tamamo was right; I had become the very person I hated the most. If she hadn't stopped me, I would have done something that I would never forgive. I was only trying to use her as Nero's replacement for my impulses.

"Still, it hurts." I blew some cold air into the air. Right now, I was cooling myself in the open field on a hill.

Tamamo was right. I did nothing for her as compared to the king. In Nero's case, my obsession only grew after working for her for a decade. In that sense, I 'earned' Nero. For Tamamo, I just blew some cringe lines and did nothing.

"What the…" I then saw something or someone leaping on top of me, but I caught the person, "Jack, how many times I have to tell you that I don't have a belly like before? You can't jump on me." I scolded her.

Maria and many children used to jump on top of me since I had a big belly in London reality, but I don't know why Jack still thinks I have one now.

"I am sorry, mommy." She apologized with teary eyes. I massaged my temples and sighed. I gave up. My daughter was just too cute.

"It's okay~!" I patted her head.

"But mommy, were you crying?" Jack then noticed my swollen eyes. She then hugged me tightly and started her cheek with mine. "Don't cry, mommy! Jack is here for you! Jack will not forgive anyone who makes my mommy cry!"

It felt hard to breathe. Sometimes, she forgets that she was a five-star servant with strength rank C. However, I just let her do what she wants.

"Then be prepared to slay Tamamo-no-Mae." But now that push had come to shove, I had no choice but to take some drastic measures.

===

Oh damn, feel free to roast me to crisp. I know people think MC is acting like a child but note that he is affected by his current body. He is also paranoid person with everything in grasp. Since he doesn't know when each event will occur, he wanted to get Tamamo as soon as possible and be done with mission.

To be honest, I also don't like this chapter. I had also cut a lot of more explicit scenes too.

But, oh well, everything will be solved in a couple of chapters and soon new volume will be arrive.

My paywall has couple of chapters ahead. So feel free to check it out.