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Fate/False Order

Accidentally killing yourself is a bummer, dying due to not reading the terms of service is embarrassing, and selling your afterlife is depressing. Now, let's follow Alistair, who, in his great wisdom performed the former while drunk, on his great quest of cleaning the Holy Grail of its corruption. And if that wasn’t hard enough, he needs to clean it during the 4th Holy Grail war, you know, the one with the worlds most feared assassin as a master, a psychopathic murder master and servant duo, a priest who goes on to hide kids in his basement, two of the knights of the round and fucking Gilgamesh in the mix. Safe to say, he’ll be acquiring premium life insurance, before stepping foot into Fuyuki. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Update schedule is three chapters a week, on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

Leylin_Blackwood · Tranh châm biếm
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50 Chs

Vol 2. Chapter 11. A Fun Time

"Are you an idiot? A jester perhaps?" Morgan's voice was amused, but it cut me deeply.

I couldn't really blame her…

27 points… I only got 27 points in an entire game of bowling.

Discreetly, I stepped on her toes, nearly causing her to trip forwards, before fixing her stride.

"Don't talk like you were much better," I said with derision. "85 points is nothing to boast about," I huffed dismissively.

It stung that I had been beaten by a newbie wearing heels, but I was obviously worse than a newbie.

Not breaking her stride, Morgan turned her head to look at me, before giving a low snort.

"I seem to recall you musing over if your skills had transferred over from your former life, and I hope for your sake that they didn't," she remarked haughty.

There was a slight pause, where Morgan probably assumed I'd affirme her suspicion that my skills hadn't crossed over, but I silently pleaded the fifth.

But Morgan was anything but stupid, and seemingly caught on.

"Don't tell me that your 'skills' actually transferred over…" she remarked with a hint of disbelief.

"I'll have you know that I am almost two decades out of practice!" I quickly defended myself, with a slight frown making its way onto my face.

Morgan was unrelenting.

"I have never played before, yet I still got more than triple your score."

"Beginners luck!" I sputtered with indignance, while pointing accusingly at Morgan.

I was definitely drawing at straws, but I had dug this hole myself, and there was no getting out of it.

Morgan merely looked at me silently, and I was sure that there was a deadpan behind that veil.

"The host offered to turn on the kids rails for your turns," she remarked dryly.

"He only did that twice!" Wait… that was not a comeback… shit.

I was gifted with an amused snort from Morgan, in reaction to the slip of my tongue.

"Indeed… add the fact that our neighbors kept on trying to give you advice about how to bowl, telling you that it was all—" "— all in the wrist, yes, yes, I know, not like I hadn't heard it a dozen times already," I cut Morgan off, while sending her a dirty look.

"It's not my fault— well, it kinda is, but let's ignore that… I just can't stop tilting my wrist to the side when I throw the ball…" I grumbled, only to receive a light pat on my shoulder from Morgan.

"There there," she soothed. "It was all thanks to you not wearing bowling shoes, right?" She compromised, causing me to purse my lips, and slowly look away.

"An apt hypothesis… but I think you might be onto something…" I said in an unconvincing tone, before walking over to the bowling hall's teller, and paying for our time here.

I didn't like him looking at me, as he gave me a pitying look, as if glancing at a mentally challenged child.

Walking out of the bowling hall, Morgan seamlessly linked her arm to mine, without a prompt.

Internally I gave myself a pat on the back, as at least she seemed to be in better spirits than before, and she had seemingly enjoyed herself.

I had never been good at bowling, but not once had my terrible bowling skills failed at making others enjoy themselves more. A small sacrifice on my end, to allow the rest to have even more fun at my expense.

Walking out the door with Morgan, I slightly tugged at her arm, causing her to look at me, meeting my gaze.

"Your turn, what do you want us to do?" I asked with interest, as I had no idea what to do next.

Morgan gave a low hum, before suddenly guiding me towards an alleyway.

{Don't look, but Assassin has been tailing us for a while now.} I didn't react to Morgan's message, and just silently followed her into the alley.

{Do you think he can see through your illusions?} I probed calmly.

{Only the first one, so he should be seeing 'Vivian'.} she affirmed.

As we got further into the alley, I felt Morgan spring up a bounded field, before swiftly plunging her another hand into my inner jacket, and pulling out my pistol.

Twirling around, she pointed it towards one of the rooftops, before pulling the trigger.

The air where the bullet was about to pierce warped, and moved further away, causing slight distortions in the places it moved.

Having missed, Morgan fired off a few more shots, each one forcing the hidden Servant to move out of the trajectory's path.

After a few more shots, Morgan lowered the pistol. "Observing our date with a normal familiar is creepy, but stalking us with a Servant, who happens to be Assassin, is practically a hostile action," Morgan glowered, in an icy tone.

Slowly, golden particles started to form, from atop the building, revealing a man in a skintight black outfit with a white skull mask.

He seemed to sturdy us, before speaking. "Pardon the intrusion, but my Master asked me to make sure nothing happened to Lord Pendragon, while Caster is still on the loose," Assassin's voice was hoarse, as if he hadn't had anything to drink in years.

Raising a brow, I cocked my head to the side. "I can handle Caster myself, and I'd prefer it if you, or any other Servant doesn't stalk me. If you wish to stay close to me, get my permission first, or else I will take it as hostile action," I explained calmly.

There was a tense silence, as Assassin glanced at the two of us, before he slowly turned into motes of golden lights. "Very well, I shall inform my Master of your words," Assassin said while dissipating.

The two of us didn't turn to look away, until Morgan handed me my gun. "He's gone," she said calmly.

Smiling, I popped out the magazine, replacing the half empty one with a full one, before placing it back in my hidden holster.

"So much for the 'No War' rule," I mused dryly.

Morgan gave a small snort, while threading her arm, back into mine.

"Indeed, but he gave me a good idea," she said with mild amusement, and eagerness.

Raising a brow, I started guiding Morgan out of the alley way, while glancing at her.

"Do tell."

I felt Morgan slightly squeeze my arm, causing me to look at her dubiously. 

"I was thinking of causing my little sister some grief," she explained, causing me to scrunch my brows,

"Pardeo?" I asked with some confusion.

"I want to mess with Artoria," she explained calmly.

"Didn't I already basically do that yesterday?" I asked with a hint of confusion.

Morgan patted my arm that was locked with hers. "Yes, and for that, I am both thankful and proud. But I need to have some more fun at her expense," she explained with amusement.

Sighing, I gave her a dubious look. "Sure, that sounds great… what exactly do you want to do?"

Morgan gave a slight huff. "Why do you sound so reluctant? This will be fun, trust me," she explained haughtily.

"Sure sweetie," I remarked dryly. "What are we gonna do?"

Morgan silently tugged me to follow her towards a park. "We are going to create a ton of raven familiars," she explained gleefully.

"Ravens?" I asked hesitantly.

"Yes, ravens," she affirmed my statement, but not answering the underlying question.

Sighing, I continued walking with her. "Why not crows, or pigeons for that matter?" I probed, hoping to get an answer this time.

Morgan gave an amused hum. "I used to have a large flock of them, for the express purpose of using them to inform Merlin or Artoria that I was watching them," she explained amusedly.

Slowly I turned and gave Morgan a side eye. "This sounds like you're trying to blow your cover," I remarked unamusedly.

Morgan lightly smacked my arm, while huffing with an air of annoyance. "Oh please, she's too thick to think that I'm the one behind it. She'll probably write it off as a coincidence, or 'Casters' doing," she huffed, before tightening her grip on my arm.

"I just wish to see the fear and uncertainty flash across her eyes when she sees the familiar sight," she explained.

"Mhm… sure… not vindictive at all," I grouched.

Morgan clicked her tongue, but didn't refute my statement.

Quickly, we found our way to one of the larger parks, and low and behold, I saw a few black birds sitting atop tree branches.

Morgan quickly erected a bounded field, and I watched on as everyone that was in the nearby vicinity packed up their things, and left without a word.

"Now…" I said while looking at the birds. "How do I distinguish between a crow and a raven?" I asked, since I really didn't know any difference between the two.

Morgan slid her arm out of my grip, and walked closer to the trees.

"Ravens are overall larger, have a more hooked beak, puffy feathers and they croak," she explained offhandedly, while placing a hand under her chin, while looking up at the birds.

She extended a hand towards the birds, but nothing happened.

Watching on, I couldn't help but tease. "Performance issues?"

Morgan slowly turned her veil covered gaze to look at me, and I was sure that she was sending me an annoyed look.

Swiftly, a second bounded field erupted from her body, but this one was a lot more potent, given how it was siphoning my od in droves.

I gave her a blank look. "Territory creation? Really?" I remarked dryly.

Quickly, five ravens flew themselves down to her extended arm, and parched himself on her.

Morgan turned her head to look at the birds, and she started petting them.

"I forgot that I wasn't in Britannia, and the animals here wouldn't listen to my every whim," she said affectionately while patting the birds.

I slowly made my way over to her, hoping not to startle the birds.

But as I got close, Morgan pointed a finger at me, and suddenly I was swarmed with birds.

Thinking quickly, I covered my face, only for the birds to perch themselves on my shoulder, and the arms I was using to block my face.

Slowly, I moved my hands away from my face, causing the birds on them to croak and flap their wings, trying to hold on.

I didn't want to cause them to fly away, so I slowly moved my arms to the side, like a scarecrow, allowing them to perch themselves nicely on me.

"Hilarious," I grumbled dryly.

Morgan didn't laugh, but nodded her head in affirmation.

"Indeed, very humorous," she snarked back, before tapping one of the birds on her arm.

A slight green glow encompassed the bird, before it flew into the sky.

This repeated twice more, as the other two on her arm, flew up, once she got done.

Morgan looked at me, and placed a hand under her chin.

Frowning, I gave her a look to get a move on… one which she seemed content on ignoring.

"I will scare them off," I threatened, causing the witch to finally move up to me, and give them the same treatment as her own ravens, causing them to fly off me.

"Happy?" She said while cocking her head to the side, as if exasperated at my annoyance at becoming a makeshift perch.

I was only thankful that none of them had shit on me.

"Ecstatic," I grouched back, while patting off the spots they had stood.

Something about my actions seemed to tip off Morgan, that I was none to amused, as she made her way back to me, and locked her arm with mine.

"Come now, no need to be so broody," she teased, while dusting off my clothes with her other arm.

"After all, we'll need a lot more ravens to make my… prank… yes, to make my prank work," she said happily but it came off as creepy.

I have a bad feeling about this…

~~Fate/False Order~~

Artoria was seated in her room, inside the Einzbern castle, reading the Anglo-Saxons by James Campbell, which Irisviel had purchased for her.

She found the idea of cross referencing the information laid down in the book with her own experiences interesting, allowing her to reminisce about better times, as well as think up scenarios of what could have been.

Was it healthy? No, but Saber didn't care. After all, she had failed her people, her subjects, her knights and even Britain itself.

Her interactions with her… family, it was still strange for her to think of them as so, was nice… but it still felt wrong.

She knew that it wasn't natural, Morgan had somehow extended our line, much like as with Mordred, and it had cost Guinevere's life, probably Lancelot's one too.

She was happy for them, but the regret for how they came to this world was still there, something she equated to be her fault as well.

If she just hadn't been taken advantage of, ignored her 'wife', or rather best friend, or taken care of Morgan, instead of not taking Merlin's opinion into account, then things would not have turned out so poorly.

Maybe if she allowed someone else to pull out the sword, someone more worthy, someone more perfect, then things would end on a happier note.

Perhaps she'd actually have a child of her own, and maybe they'd still be as successful as they are now…

Her musings were cut off thanks to the tapping of her window, which was odd, as she was on the third floor.

Snapping the book shut, she glanced at the window, only to see a large raven furiously tap its beak on the window.

The sight made Artoria furrow her brows, before she pushed herself off her seat, to walk over to the odd bird.

As she made her way over to it, she began to study, causing her eyes to dilate. The raven was a familiar.

The familiar feel of Excalibur, draped in invisible air, appeared in her open hands, allowing her to clench the hidden grip of her blade.

The bird, seeming to sense the incoming danger, started flapping its wings, allowing it to fly away from Saber's strike range.

Removing her bad hand away from Excalibur, Artoria opened the window, and stuck her head out.

Outside, she saw tens of ravens in the air, slowly circling the estate.

The sight made her internally cringe, but she knew what she needed to do.

{Kiritsugu, we are under surveillance, there are dozens of ravens circling the estate!}

Her master was not one for words, not one to even reply, so Saber didn't take any offense at his lack of response.

Swiftly, she closed the window, and sprinted down the stairs, and headed for Irisviel's room.

Irisviel was her first priority, Kiritsugu's words, not her own. And she was happy to stay with her, given the friction between herself, and her Master.

As she rushed into Irisviel's room, she was met with a surprised Irisviel, who was in the middle of looking through her family album.

"Caster's familiars are on the premises, so stick close to me, Iri," she remarked sternly.

Irisviel dropped the album she was perusing, which landed open, revealing an image of Kiritsugu with a toddler Illyasviel on his lap.

"Saber? What is happening?" She said with a hint of urgency, while standing up to her feet.

Artoria hesitantly gazed out of the room's window, where the flock of ravens had visibly grown in number, before looking back to Irisviel.

"I am uncertain as to the reason, however, it would seem that Caster has deployed an innumerable amount of raven familiars to the castle's premises," she explained, before looking back to the window.

This time, a single crow hovered just outside the window, its beady eyes staring straight at Saber.

Artoria felt some level of unease as it gazed at her, causing her to move herself in between the raven and Irisviel, while pointing her blade at it.

"Craaaaaawwwwk! Crawk!" It croaked loud enough to sound through the inch thick glass, furthering Saber's unease.

As she adjusted her grip, she watched as the raven threw itself at the glass, causing a thump sound.

As the raven slid down the glass, and fell off, another raven slammed into the window with greater speed, too much the same effect.

Irisviel gave a surprised yelp at the sight, before pulling out a coil of thin metal wire, which quickly reformed itself into a familiar.

Saber watched on another raven followed in the steps of the second one… then a third, fourth, fifth…

It was as if the floodgates had opened, as now multiple ravens slammed into the window at a time.

Some splattered on the window, their bodies unable to withstand the sudden stop, others only bounced off, but the attacks were finally making some headway, as the glass pane started to crack.

"Irisviel, get back!" Was all Saber could say, as the ravens broke the window, and poured out like water.

"Cruck!?" "Gawk?!" "Towk!" The room became filled with the sounds of wings flapping, ravens cackling, and birds splatting, as they made contact with the floor.

Artoria has acted swiftly, raising her blade in a sharp arc, killing the first few birds that entered the room, before seamlessly following into her next strike, and the next, and the next…

In the span of a single second, she had swung her blade twelve times, and in those twelve strikes, twenty three ravens died.

Blood splattered, birds fell, as Saber took steady steps towards the window, swiftly closing the gap.

Her dress gained a red tint, as blood splattered across her dress and face, but the minor inconvenience didn't distract her.

And as she reached the broken window, the ravens stopped their assault.

She watched as dozens of black birds hovered in the air, staring at her from their fixed position, as if studying her.

Saber stared at the ravens, racking her brain for what the purpose of it all was.

A distraction? Perhaps… After all, they couldn't do much to her, even if they tr— Crack!

Artoria's thought process was stopped in its place as she watched as each raven's head had been snapped, and was hanging in an odd angle.

Slowly, all the birds fell out from the sky, and splattered onto the courtyard.

Taking another step forwards, Saber was just close enough to the window, allowing her to see the courtyard.

And she stiffened.

'The Witch Sends Her Regards' was written with the corpses of the birds, along with a pool of what she assumed to be birds' blood.

The sight made Artoria think of Morgan, as the birds, their mindless death and message just screamed of her sisters doing… however that was impossible, and there was already another witch in this war.

Perhaps it was normal for witches to act in such a disgraceful way.

Frowning, she only just noticed that next to the message, the number five had formed with blood.

But just as swiftly as it shaped the number, it morphed into a four.

Widening her eyes, she started to connect the dots.

Seeing the number turn to three, she leapt to Irisviel, scooping her up, and dashing out of the room.

Not two seconds later, a resounding boom shook that section of the castle.

Not wanting to leave Irisviel vulnerable, Artoria kept her in her arms, but she turned around to gage the damages.

There was no overt damage visible, only more splattered blood in the surroundings.

Hesitantly, she placed Irisviel back down, before walking to a window.

This time she stiffened.

There was no damage from the explosion, but instead there was a message like last time, once more.

'Death to the Pendragons' was written in blood, spanning the entire garden.

Saber inadvertently tightened the grip of her blade, before snapping her neck up, to look at the sky, meeting the gaze of a lone raven, much larger than the others.

It merely flapped its wings, while staring back at her.

A second passed, then two, before the bird croaked, and vanished in a flash of green light.

Saber reflectively loosened her grip on Excalibur, before worriedly glancing down at the words decorating the garden.

'Death to the Pendragons'

Her last name was in plural, meaning that this was not only a warning to herself, but her… family.

Gritting her teeth, she looked at Irisviel.

"I need to get to my family."

~~Fate/False Order~~

Glancing away from the scrying orb, I watched the giggling Morgan with some hesitation.

"I'm glad that you are happy, but… couldn't you have thought up a less elaborate 'prank'? Or at least a less time consuming one," I remarked dryly.

Morgan stifled her laughter, by placing a hand under her veil, before turning her head to look at me.

"Please, let me have this," she said between giggles, before pointing at the image of Artoria grimacing.

"Just look at her," she said with clear amusement.

Glancing at the image of her sister, I couldn't help but fight against a slight upturn of my lips.

The blood that had landed on her dress from killing the ravens had gained a brown or yellow color upon staining on her dress… making it look like she had been steeped in shit and piss.

Combine that with her stoic face, and it made her look like a person pretending that they hadn't just rolled around in shit.

The icing on the cake, it would stay like that for at least two days.

Not exactly a very mature prank on Morgan's behalf, but it was less 'crude' than the first one she had in mind, so I saw this as an absolute win.

Morgan glanced back to the image, probably smiling behind that veil of hers, before dissipating the orb, destroying the image of Saber.

"That was great," Morgan said in a pleased tone.

Yes, because killing a few dozen ravens, drenching your sister in blood, and then making her look like a fool, was the textbook definition of fun.

Morgan pushed herself up from the ground, which I mirrored, causing us to stand side by side.

"I feel rather peckish, would you care to escort this fair lady to dine?" She asked coyly.

Right, asking a Pendragon if they are hungry, is she making fun of me? Of course I am hungry.

Hooking my arm with her own, I gave her a lopsided smile.

"Food sounds great, let's go."

112 Hours, 2 Minutes And 53 Seconds Until Zero 

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A/N

Welcome back, my reader Overlords, please add this to your library and give me some comments, stones and Reviews, as it would be much appreciated.

A bit late on the update, I know... Autumn break just started, and I wanted a days break! Will try to post another chapter tomorrow as well, but no promises. But I will still post three chapters this week>.<

Now, give me your thoughts on the chapter, and tell me what you'd like to see!

Btw, I have made a Discord server for the fic, come on and chat with me!

https://discord.gg/8UkprnrG

Now I'm tired, so have a nice day, and send me some stones or some shit, I need motivation, or some shit like that.