Thank you for continuing to read

Dear Reader,

Thank you for choosing to read my work. I want to say that I feel incredibly honored and humbled by this.

Reader I want you to go on a journey with me. I want you to experience the joy of reading. My life I have always been surrounded by books. It was not until I left home at 17 was when I lost my desire to read. I was living off the money I saved while working in high school and bouncing from couch to couch. I knew it as couch surfing but I do not know if that phrase is out dated. It was a time before Airbnb, twitter and Snap chat. Facebook was in its infant stage and MySpace had past its peak. I was anything but carefree. I was careful. I remembered everything that my dad had told me. "Remember that you date to mate." Having sex does not mean you and him will stay together. The only real thing you can ever give your husband is your virginity.

Yeah my dad and I had those 'real talks' all the time. I was and still am close to my dad. I treasure him and he taught me the value of valuing myself. So readers- male or female- remember to value yourself and believe in yourself. Must be a legend in your own mind.

Yeah. A legend. Reader I want you to find something that you are good at and that you enjoy- this will be key when you are older. As long as what you are good at is not illegal or immoral- hone in on it and use it to your advantage. Find ways to expand it to help you advance in life. No one will help you until you help yourself first. Now I am not here to preach or stand on a soapbox (I.e. the phrase "standing on a soapbox" means that you are elevating yourself to give a speech). I am just writing my thoughts as they come to me.

I am a wife and mother, naturally because I am a traditional type person and other avenues of life are not bad- just not how I personally want to live. I guess maybe if I choose a different path- I might not daydream as much as I do, but my life is what it is. I have secert crushes on fake characters yet when I look at my husband- I swear my heart skips a beat. When he kisses me- my body wants to moan and melt. I can't help but smile when I see my kids. It's not because I'm holding back wanting to beat them. Although my kids *do* test me- a lot. But I do whole heartedly love them. I would die for them. Hell I did almost die with my first born.

My household brings me joy but also so much s sadness. My house is always messy, disorganized and just gross. I clean but it's not good enough. My husband and kids clean- but the house is still dirty. I do not make enough to hire someone to clean my house. It should be me cleaning but I do not. I really never have. I'm not a housekeeper. Remember reader when I mentioned to you that you should find what comes naturally and hone that skill. Welp I didn't. I used to be so organized, clean and everything had a home- nothing in my bedroom while growing up was "homeless." I mean I did not have nearly as much stuff as I do now. But I didn't hone that skill. When my dad cooked dinner I did not learn how to cook and I didn't practice when I could have. So now my family knows restaurants than recipes. My daughter does not know fractions- so I had to teach her fractions using cooking and baking skills. I failed her as a mother.