Bridge

Terminal velocity for a human body in belly-to-earth freefall is approximately 120 miles per hour. It generally takes about twelve seconds for a body to reach that velocity, in which time it would've fallen about 1,500 feet. The Bay Bridge is only 220 feet above the water, high enough for a body to reach slightly less than eighty miles per hour. Lucky for me a human can only hope to survive an impact with water at less than seventy miles per hour.

It took me a while to make it to the bridge's apex, mostly because I knew what waited for me there. As I stood in the dark looking down at the bay, I could scarcely see more than reflections of moonlight across the peaks of waves. It was a desolate sight; it made it feel as though every last ounce of joy had gone from the world.

Finally, I gathered myself and climbed across the balustrade and dropped to the maintenance catwalk that spanned this part of the bridge. The wind was cold—it nipped at my lips and my ears. I felt tears gathering in my eyes.

"*Hey!*" someone called from above. "*What are you doing?*"

I looked up at the stranger, a young woman with long hair, then looked back down. "Go away."

"*It's dangerous!* *Why don't you come back up?*"

I placed a foot on the lowest waterside rail and started to climb.

"*No!* *Wait!*"

The woman started over the balustrade herself, meaning to join me. I waited.

"Wow, that was scary," she said. "Hi. My name's Felicity."

"Of course it is," I said under my breath. "Well—*Felicity*—why don't you leave me alone. This is sort of a private moment."

"You don't want to do this."

"Oh? And how would you presume to know what I want?"

"All I know is whatever it is, it can't be worth all this."

I started to hike myself over. She grabbed at me reflexively; I let her ease me back to the catwalk.

"I admit it—I have no idea what's going on in your life," she said sincerely. "And I know it must be bad for you to be here—but you're young. No feeling is final—things get better."

"How can you say that? You don't know the first thing about me."

"But I've been you—I've been where you are. And luckily, someone was there for me."

"*Luckily?*" I snorted softly. "Well, Felicity, I think your luck just ran out."

She was small, so I managed to hoist her over the rail with relative ease. I listened to her scream fly away from me, then I heard her body impact the water.

He laughed quietly, then emerged from the darkness and eased his way toward me.

"Can I see him now?" I begged. "I did what you asked. Can I see my son?"

"I don't think so. There's more to do—tomorrow."

I looked down through the dark to the joyless water below.