Stranded (Omake)

It was 9 pm and I was cleaning up my house. Bright had visited to 'party' and left in a hurry, citing an emergency at Site-19. The fucker just didn't want to clean up.

I sighed and reached down for a used napkin when my vision suddenly blurred. The space around me refracted like a kaleidoscope and I fell through the tear in space.

I felt like I was in the air in the middle of a hurricane. Colors swam around me, I felt stuff hitting me at random times, felt underwater and on fire at the same time, and I couldn't detect anything with my soul based radar.

It all suddenly stopped when I appeared in a black cloud, and my senses finally showed people around me. That had been scary, not sensing anything with a radius equal to 500,000 km was very disturbing.

I heard voices but I didn't understand the language. With another sigh I reached into the oldest mind and basically demanded its knowledge of language.

It was strange, to dominate souls to not notice you and demand stuff from it. I felt dirty doing it but I refused to not be able to understand some possible cultists.

This had been my most violent summoning but certainly not my first one. My first time was when the Children of the Scarlet King had summoned me and demanded I give them my soul as a sacrifice for some weird ass ritual. They died pretty quickly after that.

… There were a lot of children around me. That was never a good thing. Children were annoying little bastards, but usually on summonings this meant that this cult was specially nasty.

I finally began to understand the people talking once I had integrated the basically copy pasted language.

"She did it again, another explosion!"

"Wait no, there's something inside the smoke!"

"A commoner!?"

… Fucking children.

"Hah! The zero summoned a human!"

Oh, so this wasn't a cult? Maybe just a group of young magicians trying out a summoning spell.

That is when I saw the pink hair that didn't even reach my chest.

"There is no way my legacy will be summoning a commoner. I refuse to believe it." The pink blob spoke, its tone so dead I may have thought a ghoul was talking.

Also, being called a commoner was annoying.

"Who the hell are you calling a commoner?"

The pink haired girl pointed her wand menacingly at me.

"You! Don't talk back!"

Was she serious? There was no way she expected me to not talk back after being called a commoner.

"Why should I? Is free speech not a thing around here?" Wait a minute, shit! Maybe it wasn't a thing here.

"I don't know what free speech is, but my summon won't be known for talking back to nobles!"

People around here really liked screaming. I was literally in front of her and she had screamed everytime she had talked to me.

"Uh huh, and why would I be your summon?"

"Well because I summoned you of course!"

The middle aged man sighed and motioned towards pinky with his hand.

"Just finish your ritual Ms. Valliere, we will see what to do with the commoner at a later date."

"But there has never been someone with a commoner as her summon!"

"Just hurry up, I don't want to expel you."

"I… I understand."

She began walking towards me with a very crossed expression.

"You should be grateful! You'd normally never receive this from a noble"

Now they were gonna give me stuff? What the actual fuck was going on here?

"Listen little girl, I have no idea of who you are, and I am honestly not interested in anything you could possibly give to me."

"Just shut up and stay still!"

She got real close to me and I got ready for any surprise attacks.

"My name is Louise Françoise le Blanc de la Vallière. Pentagon that rules the five powers, bless this individual, and make him my familiar!"

"Oh hell nah."

I had been almost made a fucking familiar before. This was not happening to me again. Fucking entitled brats. Seruously, how fucking vain does someone has to be to expect another being they just met to accept being their familiar.

As she was leaning in, ignoring my words, I decided that I would break her illusion of whatever was going on.

I created a wall in between us. I did not know what she believed she had to do to make me her familiar, but letting her get closer was a no no.

Then I decided to fuck with them, they clearly did not know of me, so I could probably mess with them. After I had fucked the GOC over they made every fucking mage in the planet aware of me.

So I began to grow into a dragon, changing forms was not very hard, the hardest part was to get a template of what you wanted to change into or you'd end up looking like an AI generated picture. Fortunately, even if I had never been close enough to a dragon to scan it, I had a lot of practice doing this specific transformation.

Why you ask? Because you must always be yourself. Unless you can be a dragon. Then always be a dragon.

So as I grew in size, almost reaching the height of the castle's wall where I had been summoned, I looked down at the now very little pink girl and finally put some level of authority in my voice.

"Why the fuck would I, Red, be your familiar?"

And now the whole group looked ready to cry and piss themselves. This was going great!

"Why would I willingly tie myself in such a manner to you? Why would I even listen to your request after you have kidnaped me from my home!?"

Now that I had an upper view of the area, and saw all the other creatures around every other mage, I kinda understood what was going on.

"B-because every other noble has a summon!"

"Foolishness, Louis. Foolishness. You nobles expect everything to be given to you just because of some delusion of grandeur. Mark my words Louise de la Valliere. I shall never be a familiar. Should you want one, try summoning another one!"

I began flapping my now enormous wings and started to dominate my place in time and space, preparing to leave and return home, when I realized I was not in my universe anymore.

I slowly stopped flapping and began to let out my soul. I was not amused anymore, the situation had changed. The SCP universe had a distinct 'flavor' to it. This one had another, this one was disgusting.

As my soul started affecting gravity I stopped it from actually killing everyone in the country I had been summed to.

I leaned down and looked at a teacher, the kids obviously would be too scared to act. Actually, the teacher might also be too scared to do anything. I was just gonna hope he had some kind of protective instinct.

"Where have I been summoned to, I do not recognize the place. Answer as clearly as you can, or I will end this pathetic country of mongrels trying to act like nobles." I let my tone be as sweet as I could. I needed the threat to be taken as seriously as possible.

SCPs and others mentioned:

SCP-12725, Zero no Tsukaima universe

AN

This is a rant cuz I hate every zero fic ever.

If any of y'all finds a spelling mistake, has questions, has some criticism, or whatever, please leave a comment. I enjoy reading them.

Anyway, thanks for reading.