The Depths

Its been a month. A whole fucking month with this nutcase. I cant remember anything about myself still, but boy have i learned a LOT about Alucard.

I learned that he sings in the shower, and his favorite song is Endless Grey, by Sworn In (though I cant understand a single word of it). I know that his favorite color is red, he likes his steak literally not cooked at all, and he has a job that i cant know about. I learned that the man literally doesnt sleep if im around or awake. I learned that he has some.... extraordinary taste in women. Seriously. He brought one home one night, and she looked like a literal hooker. I have no idea what they did that night, but im almost scared to ever sleep in that bed again. 

"Whatchhhhaa writing there, Trouble?" I groan as he rips my notebook out from under my hand. My name isnt Trouble, but he insists on calling me that. 

"now theres gonna be a long black line across the page from my pen," I whine in protest. He looks at me blankly, telling me how little he cares about my stupid pen line. 

"Hey now! You dont get to judge my taste in women!" He points his long, thin finger in my face. I swat it away as i reach for my notebook. He yanks it up, knowing im far too short to retrieve it from him. 

I sigh in defeat and make my way to the couch. Im about to turn the TV on when the door opens. I look over and see my favorite person standing in the doorway. I shriek and run over to her, and throw my arms around her in the tightest hug I can. 

"Hey babydoll. I missed you too," Nephthys smiles warmly as she returns the hug. I let her go so she can come in fully, and stick my tongue out at Alucard to assert my dominance. He narrows his eyes at me, and I retreat to the living room with Neph. 

"Ill see you two later, " Alucard states as he opens the door. We both nod at him, waiting for him to leave. I especially am impatient. I have something i want to talk to Nephthys about. 

As soon as the door closes, she turns to me. "Hey sweet thing. You texted me to tell me you needed to talk. Whats going on?" Her face switches from happiness to concern. I bite my lip and try to bury my face in my hair. 

"What does Alucard do when hes gone? He wont tell me anything, and sometimes i swear he has blood on him when he comes home. Im getting really anxious about it," I confess. My body threatens to start sending tears, but i will it away. 

Neph sighs heavily. I can tell shes nervous about this conversation, and shes deeply contemplating what to say next. "Luna, I-" She begins. "If i tell you, you cant tell Alucard that you know. He made me promise not to say anything, but i think you can handle it, " She's nervous. The worry lines are prominent. I nod, letting her know to continue. 

"Do you know about the grim reaper?" She gives a half smile, though i know shes trying to hide her worry. I again, nod to tell her to proceed. 

"Alucard and I... well... We are sort of like that... But the grim reaper is specifically known as the reaper of Death. He takes lives. But theres a lot of other reapers. Theyre based off superstitions, but they are in-fact, real." I cock my head to the side. I dont understand how this is relevant, but i let her keep going anyways. 

"I, am the reaper of love. I chose who is allowed to love each other for the rest of their human lives. I chose whether or not a relationship is meant to be. Alucard on the other hand..." She pauses, scanning my face for my thoughts. I think its sweet that she controls love. In that same moment, I realize what shes trying to tell me. 

I stand up, and grab my head. " you mean he KILLS people?!" I practically scream at her. I cant believe what im hearing. As a matter of fact, none of this makes sense. This cant be real. 

"Luna, hold on a seco-" I cut her off before she can finish.

"You mean to tell me that all this time, ive been buddies with a fucking serial killer?! You let me trust him?! This cant be real! i dont believe you! " I continue to take my frustration out on her. She winces at my words. I dont mean to hurt her, but i cant control myself right now. 

"We didnt chose this, L. We were born into it. We have to do it, or there will be consequences, " She breathes out the last word. She holds her chest as the tears build on her waterline. My heart aches at the sight of this, and i sit back down. 

"What kind of consequences?" I ask, calmer this time. I know shes being honest. I know shed never lie to me. Shes been nothing but kind, and i cant imagine shed say any of this just to hurt me. 

" Theres a man named Chaos. He rules over the reaper realm, as we call it, The After. If one of us falls out of line, he well condemn us. We will be sent to The Depths, with the reaper of Fear. Reapers dont die unless Chaos himself kills us, so we spend years and years being tortured in the Depths. Crixus will use our greatest fears against us until we are at wits end, and then he will make sure we suffer even more. The entire time its unbearable. We cannot escape until Chaos decides we can. And some reapers.... They never get out," Shes sobbing now. I grab her and pull her close to me. I hold her as she lets out her regrets and pain. I feel her shake underneath my arms. 

"shhh, " I do my best to comfort her. She wipes her eyes with the sleeves of her black sweater. I give her an adoring kiss on her head before she sits back up. She gives me a look of regret, and i shake my head. 

" im so sorry. I had no idea, " I apologize sincerely. She gives me her best attempt at a smile and shrugs. 

" Its not your fault. We dont really tell anyone. To talk about it makes it real, and we dont like to live in that world. We all have our ways of coping. Mine is easy, because i make people happy for a living and that helps. For Alucard, its sex. Disgusting, borderline-abusive, sex," her eyes widen for a split second at the thought of it, and so do mine. I shiver, trying to push the image back out. 

We are abruptly interrupted when the door swings open. Its Alucard. He has another barely-dressed girl under his arm. She laughs obnoxiously as they enter. 

"Neph, you can leave now, " He states, refusing to tear his attention away from the woman. I cringe in disgust as I look towards Nephthys. She pats my thigh apologetically before grabbing her bag and walking out the door.