Chapter 1: Before Death

"You're a good distraction from thinking about death." she smiled genuinely but it never reached her eyes. There was always something there. Something that will always keep her from being happy.

He can only look at her. There are no words that he can muster that can alleviate the pain that she was going through.

"I remember how it feels to be happy though, I remember how it feels to smile and laugh about things around me. I remember playing funny games with my family. I remember genuinely laughing with you at some point. I know cause I have pictures of it. I don't think I've ever laughed that much before. I remember because those are the things that I cherished the most. And I like keeping it in my memories. I remember the feeling of opening a new book, it feels like a new adventure. I remember the feeling of being interested on something. I remember the feeling of loving something to the point where you'd lose sleep for it. I remember warm hugs. I remember the warmth of a blanket being draped over my shoulders. I remember the laughter of my nephews. I remember how I would have thoughts in my head that would turn out as sentences. I remember being happy for creating a story. And I so wish that I still have the ability to do all of that, cause that is something that I love the most doing. Writing a story, making... probably impossible scenarios on my mind of things I want to happen, or worlds I want to be a part in. I remember how it feels to be happy."

"Don't you want to continue doing those things again?" he whispered knowing full well that she's gonna hear it.

"I want to but I just can't." she replied as she looked at the vast image of the sea. Imagining how it feels to be floating in it.

"Why?" he inquired. He could not understand why, maybe that's the difference of being a human. Having all these memories and emotions about everything around them.

"Because those everything that used to make me happy, I figured out that I was never happy at all. I was happy at the time that it was happening but as soon as the laughter ended, as soon as those people left, I have my straight face on and all those feeling vanished in thin air as if it was stolen from me. And it always made me think that those are fleeting feelings because I never made it to bed with a smile on my face."

He looked at her intently, she was smiling but she looked so sad. Her mouth was upwards but her eyes held a different emotion. I guess it is true about what they say that the eye is the window of the soul. She was looking at the sky at this point, and there were a lot of stars. Even the moon is shining brightly. He looked at the sky thinking how easy it is to fly up high enough to reach the stars.

"Do you want to see those stars up close?"

This time her head turned to him in amusement. This time a genuine smile came out of her.

"I'm willing to fly you up there." she smiled at him.

"Thank you for thinking of making me happy, but those stars are just stones. Far far away."

"Ohh" his shoulder slumped which made her lip twitch upwards. 

"But I would love to fly with you, if that's what you were offering a while ago." he immediately looked at her with excitement in his eyes. She laughed before she could even think about it.

He stood up and offered his hand, at this point he was already slightly floating up the air. She stood up and dusted her dress before she took his hand. He held her waist using his right hand tightly and held her hand.

"Hold tight Lilianna."

She held on his shoulders tightly as she felt the breeze on her face. It was salty as they were near the sea. And as sad as she was this moment also made her the happiest.

 Rael held onto her as he flew up to the sky. This moment is something that he can hold on to, she was smiling. This time it reached her eyes, she was genuinely happy.

"When I go, will you be there?" Rael was surprised by her question. He was a being that does not belong in this world. Nevertheless, he genuinely cares about her from the day that he met her.

"I am always here Lilliana."

"Then, I guess I'll see you soon."