Nineteen

Before I knew what happened, it was May. I don't even remember April, to be honest. I missed Hades during the day, wishing he would visit, and became sick by night. Hekate kept up her promise and would help every time I threw up, grew nauseous, got a nosebleed, or got a headache.

But the constant nausea and vomiting meant that I lost weight and retained very little of it. My hair was even a bit thinner. By the end of April, I resembled what I looked like in August of last year. Hekate did her best to get me to keep some weight. I am grateful for everything that she has done for me.

My twenty-third birthday crept closer, but I had no interest in celebrating. The only thing that I wanted was my husband to return.

Hekate shook me awake. "Calantha, I know you're sick, but you're not allowed to sleep the day away!"

I glared at her. "I am dying."

She pinched me. "Gods can't die!"

I laughed and hugged her. "I am glad that you're back."

Hekate has been gone for the past three days, getting me a birthday present. "I am glad to be back. Now, come on, I have your gift."

"But, my birthday is tomorrow."

"That doesn't matter."

I climbed out of bed, ran a brush through my hair, and met Hekate downstairs. She handed me a wrapped gift. I tore off the wrapping paper—it's a scrapbook. I turned a page, and my breath caught in my throat. They were all pictures of Hades.

They were quick snapshots of him: some at his desk, some of him reading, some of him on his throne. There were even a few photos of Kerberos. "Oh, Hekate," I whispered. "It's beautiful."

"Thank you. It took me all three days to get any usable pictures. Hades really doesn't like his picture taken."

I reached forward, embracing my best friend. We were pulled apart by a knock at the door. I frowned. Who is it?

Hekate answered it. "Κυρία τισ Σιταριο," she said, her voice cold.

"Κυρία του Σκότους," the all-too-familiar voice of my mother reached my ears. "May I come in?"

Hekate looked back at me, and I nodded. Hekate moved back, and my mother stepped past her. "Oh, Calantha, you look sick."

I'm a little past 'sick.' I'm considered 'terminal' at this point.

"Yeah, that's what happens when you take someone who belongs to the Underworld, out of it."

My mother ignored Hekate's comment.

"Your birthday is tomorrow, and I want to celebrate Beltane like we always do. Like we did."

I sighed. "I don't know, mother. What you did upset me."

"I only lied about your father to protect you."

"I don't want to hear your excuses, mother. I will think about it, okay?"

"Okay, I suppose." She awkwardly cleared her throat. "I will be right back."

"What did your mom want?" Hekate asked, moving from the kitchen once the door clicked shut.

I rolled my eyes. "To ask if we could still celebrate Beltane—as if I don't wish that she was out of my life."

Hekate laughed and patted my hand. "Well, Calantha, you do whatever feels right to you."

"But I don't know what is right. I don't want to see my mother there, but she's my mother."

"I have your gift," my mother said, bringing forward a potted plant: petunias. "I tended to your plants while... while you were gone, and I noticed that your petunias were dead. I got you some to replace them."

I took the plant. "Thank you, mother. I will plant these as soon as I can."

I turned too quickly, and the spots clouded my vision. The pressure behind my eyes demanded to get out, and I stumbled forward. Hekate rushed toward me, grabbing me before I could face-plant. She helped me to a chair.

"Thanks," I murmured. I took a few deep breaths, trying to gather my bearings.

"Calantha?" my mother asked. "What was that?"

"I'm sick. It's the Underworld punishing me for leaving."

"What?"

"To put it simply: If I weren't a god, I would be dead."

I began to cough. And then I couldn't stop. My shoulders shook as each cough ripped through me. I heard Hekate say something, and a warm substance flowed down my throat. The coating soothed my cough, and it died out.

I wiped my mouth and saw with fear that my hand came back golden. "Hekate," I whispered, "is that blood?"

She nodded, a grave look on her face.

"What do we do?"

Hekate turned to my mother, who wore a horrified expression on her face. "I believe it is time for you to go."

"But—"

Hekate all-but pushed her out of my house. "Goodbye."

"That's not a very good sign, is it?" I murmured, still watching the liquid glisten on my fingers.

"No. It's not."

"What do we do?" I repeated.

"Zeus will not be happy, but I believe we have to return you to the Underworld. The sickness is getting worse."

I broke my stare down with my hand. "Do you mean that?"

"Yes. Although you will not die, it won't be a good life if you don't heal."

"What's on your mind, darlin'?" Blodwen asked. I jumped, not hearing her approach me. "Sorry, darlin'."

"It's fine. I just..." I sighed. "My mother was half of the reason why I disappeared for all of those months. Now she wants to celebrate my birthday. I don't know if I should let her or not."

"Well, how was she to ye in the past?"

"Smothering, wouldn't let me see my husband—back when he wasn't my husband—things like that."

"Well, you can't spell 'smother' without 'mother.'"

I cracked a smile at her joke. "You couldn't be more accurate."

"But, Calantha, if she was a bitch to you before, she's not gonna change. I wouldn't invite her over if I was you, but I don't wanna tell you what to do."

I smiled. "Thank you, Blodwen. I don't think I will invite her over, after all."

Blodwen pulled me into a hug. "Anytime, darlin'. Anytime."

~~~

"Let's have a midnight picnic," Hekate said, bustling into my room later that day.

I lifted the blanket from over my head with a groan. "I want to sleep."

"You can—in an hour."

"But my mother—"

"Her ritual finished a half-hour ago. She won't spot us."

I decided not to celebrate Beltane with my mother, after all. I've been mostly in bed all day, pondering whether it was the right decision. Thank goodness I am not on the schedule for tomorrow.

With no other excuse, I dragged myself out of the comfort of my bed. Hekate scooped up a blanket and basket from the counter. How long has she been preparing this?

I curled up on the blanket next to her. The air was sticky and humid tonight—as it always is in the warm months. I dreaded when it hits July because that's when I detest the South. But that's also when all of the flowers are blooming...

"Do you want anything to eat?" Hekate asked.

"What did you make?"

"Some sweet tea, sandwiches, strawberries, potato salad, stuff like that."

I laid my head in her lap with a smile. "Sweet tea? You're more southern than I am! But I want some strawberries."

I closed my eyes. The sounds of Hekate rustling through the basket filled the air. I like how silent it is—how peaceful everything is. I think this is the first time I haven't been nauseous for a long time.

"What about you?"

Before I could tell her that I already responded, a voice answered, "I don't care for anything, Hekate. Thank you."

I bolted upright, my husband gazing down at me. I was in his arms in a split-second. "Hades? What...?"

"You did not think that I would miss your birthday, did you?"

I tightened my hold around him. We moved to sit beside Hekate.

"Magnolia, have you lost weight?" Hades tugged at my shirt as it fell down my shoulder.

"Yes," Hekate answered. "It's the sickness."

"You don't mean...?"

"Yes. It's the sickness from the Underworld."

"Why did you not inform me of this these past days?"

Hekate shrugged. "I didn't want to ruin my gift. And it was only this past day have I realized the severity of it."

Hades gave her a look that said he was not amused. I kissed his cheek before the anger started. "But I'm fine at the moment."

"Calantha, look at you! You're as thin as a rail. And your skin is so pallid." He turned to Hekate. "We have to bring her back when I return."

Hekate nodded. "I agree."

I put a hand on Hades' arm. "But what about Zeus?"

"Fuck Zeus! You're dying!"

Where did he get that mouth?

"Hades, I can't die."

"But you look like you're dead. I don't care if Zeus razes Olympus in an attempt to find you—you're an inch from death."

"O-okay. Let me grab my brooch and scrapbook first."

Hades supported me as I walked into the house. "Do you like it, then? The pin?"

I softly kissed him. "I love it."

The minute my feet touched the marble foyer of the palace, it was as if something let go of me. I could breathe again. "Oh, how I missed it here," I whispered.

"We missed you, as well," Thanatos said, appearing at the top of the staircase.

I grinned, embracing him as he met us at the base of the stairs. "How have you been?"

"How have I been? Look at you! I've seen healthier dead people."

"Well, I knew the consequences of leaving. I knew that it would slowly kill me."

"Speaking of the illnesses, let's get you upstairs to bed," Hades said, slipping an arm around my waist. I bid them both goodbye.

"We brought her back to let the Underworld heal her," I heard Hekate tell Thanatos as I moved away from them.

I drank in the room that I've come to know so well. Everything was where I left it exactly—as if the room held its breath for me, waiting. The only thing that seemed touched was Hades' bed. And that's where I want to be.

Hades scooped me up in his arms. I let out a squeak of surprise. "I am sorry, my wife, but I must break the vow that I undertook."

"What vow?"

"The vow in which I swore to start making babies immediately."

I laughed, remembering that night.

"You are too sick, I am afraid."

"I forgive you, my dear husband. I am too tired anyway."

~~~

"Hera?" I called to the blonde down the hall. "I need to speak with you for a minute."

She stopped and faced me, a look of irritation traversing her face. I crossed the corridor to her. "What brings you to my house?"

"You know of both happy and displeased marriages, right?"

"Being the goddess of marriages, yes. Why?"

"Calantha and Hades' marriage, will you tell me about it?"

"That is none of your business."

"Please? I wouldn't ask if I didn't require it."

Hera sighed. "Come with me to my parlor. We may speak in private there."

Hera led me through the crisscrossing hallways of the Palace of Olympus. I tend to stay away from Olympus because it is too grand for my tastes, but one can't help but see the dazzling aspects of it. There was laughter everywhere.

Everyone here seemed content and relaxed.

Hera's parlor reflected her—elegant yet grand and a bit vain. Her tastes included lots of gold and ivory and expensive knickknacks. There was a beautiful painting of a peacock on one wall. Hera's windows overlooked the lush gardens, brimming with every color imaginable.

Calantha would love that.

Hera spoke, "What do you wish to know? Wisely ask your words because I am inclined not to tell you."

"Did Hades kidnap Calantha?"

"No. Calantha fell into the Underworld."

A massive wave of guilt swept over me. All this time, I blamed the man, yet he is as innocent as a lamb.

"What about their love? Is it true? Is it genuine?"

Hera raised her eyebrows. "Why do you demand to know? Why, after all this time?"

"I have just spoken to your husband, Zeus, and I fear that I have made a mistake."

"If you must be aware—yes, their love is sincere. I spoke with the Moirai some time ago, and they told me that they created Calantha for that explicit purpose. Calantha was to be the Queen of the Underworld from the beginning."

I closed my eyes as the guilt grew in my stomach. Oh, dear. What have I done to Calantha? I try so hard to be there for her, and yet I do this to her. She wasn't ill when she told me of their love—she was not under some spell, but speaking the truth.

What have I done to my poor daughter?

I met Hera's gaze once more. "Hera, my sister, I need your help. I am afraid I have done something terrible."