I ACCEPT MY FATE.

"Suzuki, I never should have hit you and I am sorry. I can't bring you guys back to life but I beg for your forgiveness."

Suzuki tightened his grip around my neck and screamed:

"FORGIVENESS? YOU DO NOT DESERVE FORGIVENESS, JAYSON!"

Ilooked into his eyes and smiled.

All these while i have been running away from my fears and past when i should've faced it.

"Suzuki, Amaya, i am sorry for everything i ever did to you and if my sins can't be forgiven then I accept my fate."

I smiled for a few seconds and closed my eyes as tears slowly rolled down my cheeks. I am not running anymore from my past, i have to face it and accept the consequences even if it result in death.

I reflected on my childhood moments I missed so much. My favorite childhood moment was when I was 5 years old. It was my birthday and after the celebration, my mom told me a bedtime story she wrote for me. I was so happy and our conversation that night became a permanent memory. One that I can never erase or forget.

["What do you want to be when you grow up, Jayson?"

"I want to write stories like you, mum."

"I wasn't expecting that but do I inspire you that much?"

"You are my motivation. I love you mom."

"I love you too son. Always remember that no matter what happens or who you become, i will always love you. You are special, never forget that.]

From that time until now, i could never bring myself to forgetting the story my mom wrote for me.

It goes like this:

There was once a young elf named Zyren who hailed from a poor family. Everyone treated his family as an outcast since they were the poorest family in the Maryland (the city of elves).

Zyren's dream as a kid was to become one of the strongest knights in order to protect his city in times of war. Although for the past 600 years, no war occurred, Zyren however anticipated that Arkville was going to strike again. Arkville was a city filled with giant and vicious orcs.

Zyren trained day in and day out because he knew that the orcs were going to be stronger than before. He forged his own weapons and in time discovered magic. He gained the ability to teleport.

Year after year,, he trained and warned his people, yet they laughed and mocked him.

One day, the elves woke up only to realize they were being attacked by the orcs.

All the knights of Maryland were slain, and Maryland was captured. The elves then came to realize that the orcs were mightier and stronger than before.

In the attack, Zyren's family were captured. Therefore, filled with rage, he fought with the orcs in hopes of saving his family and city. It was one man against an army. Despite that Zyren showed no fear.

Due to his teleportation ability, he slew thousands of orc soldiers causing Aganon, the orc king to tremble.

By the time Jayson reached the orc king, he was weak and worn out. Yet his eyes were taunting the orc king.

"Why do you keep fighting? Don't you see that all hope is lost?" The orc's king asked.

"No, Hope forever remains as long as one is willing to fight for a cause."

With that said, Jayson chopped off Aganon's head and saved his city.

Everyone cheered him as a hero and his childhood dream finally came true.

His family was safe, and they were no longer treated as an outcast.

The elf king gave his daughter Serina to Jayson as a wife, and they all lived happily ever after.

Although it's not the best bedtime story but it stucked with me because i wanted to be Zyren. I wanted that determination and courage to fight for those i love.

My mom after finishing the story whispered in my ears:

"You are Zyren, son. You always have been."

I smiled and hugged.

As i remembered this, tears continued to pour down my face waiting for Suzuki to put an end to my miserable life.

Suddenly, I fell hard to the ground back first.

Ahhhh! I groaned in pain.

When i tried to get up, I noticed Suzuki staring at me with his hand stretchedtoward me. Reluctantly, I placed my hands in his outstretched hand and he aided me to stand on my feet.

"He dropped me, why didn't he kill me when he had the chance?" I asked myself.

Slowly, tears welled up in his eyes and he smiled after taking in a deep breath.

"I forgive you, Jayson."

Then he knelt and grabbed my legs.

I also dropped to my knees and hugged him.

We both stared at each other and wept.

"Jayson..."

"Suzuki..."

Then we hugged and cried on each others shoulder.

"I can never bring myself to killing you, Jayson. You are more than my best friend. You are my brother. I love you more than anything."

My mind was finally at peace after reconcilling with an old friend, my brother-Suzuki.

But the joy was shortlived.

Sukuzi was turned to a pile of dust and was swept away from my grab by the wind.

I lost him once again and I couldn't help but rain my fist on the floor.

"WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAVE TO HAPPEN TO ME!" I screamed.

Despite looking and crying unto the ground, I could sense someone moving towards me.

I slowly raised my head to have a look.

It was Amaya. She drew close towards me and placed her hands under my chin and raised it a little higher to look into her eyes.

She was no longer crying blood, she was smiling and looked more cheerful.

"You haven't lost anything, Jayson. We will always be with you. I will always love you."

I tried getting closer to hug her but it was too late. She also turned to dust after she faintly whispered:

"Goodbye, my love."

I cried uncontrollable to the extent of losing my strength. I lied on the ground and cried. It was all coming back to me-the memories Amaya, Suzuki and I shared.

I couldn't control myself and wept until i fell asleep.

When I opened my eyes, I was back in my room and i was lying on the floor.

"Is this a dream?" I asked myself.

I quickly got up and looked around.

Everywhere was quiet and it was almost like I was the only one in the house. There was no sound of the tv or from my dad.

My eyes glanced upon a pink diary on my bed.

I sat on the bed, picked it up and opened it.

Suddenly, a hand appeared out of the book and pulled inside.

The next thing i realized was that i was out in the woods.

"How is this possible?" i questioned myself.

I was lost in thoughts and suddenly I heard my mom's voice.

It was so loud that it echoed everywhere.

I tried searching around but she was no where to be found.

She continued to speak which made me understood that she had something to tell me.

"Dear diary, this might be the last time I ever write again. I had to make a difficult decision in my life. I had to abandon my son, Jayson. I can never forgive myself and I know that he will never forgive me as well. But I have to leave because i have cancer. The doctor said it curable, but it requires a huge sum of money that I can never provide. Mr. Ramsey had been proposing to me for weeks and when he found out I had cancer, he agreed to help me get cured on condition that I agree to be his wife. It's a tough decision but I have to take it. Who knows I may live in the future long enough to find how my son great and successful. I will always love you, Jayson."

"My mom had cancer all this while?" I asked myself as I quaked in fear.

In the blink of an eye, I found myself in a room. It was really fancy, and I could tell the owner was very rich just by looking around.

I heard someone crying which caused me to move around to find who it was.

As I walked around, I came across a door. The cries became louder when I got to the door.

"Whoever is crying must be in here." I said to myself.

I took hold of the doorknob and opened the door.

When I entered, I saw a woman lying on the bed crying desperately.

When I got closer, I heard my name being mentioned.

"I am really sorry, Jayson. I hope you can one day forgive me." She said as she cried to herself.

When I drew more closer, I found her carry a picture of me in her bosom.

"Mom..." I said.