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After I Suicide My Life Restarted With The Life Restarted I Longed For

Have you ever felt like life is just too much to handle? Like the weight of the world is on your shoulders and you can't go on anymore? That's how I felt before I decided to end it all. But then something strange happened, I woke up in a different reality, one where my life was everything I had ever wanted it to be. The question is, what will I do? Accept and happily cherish it or vainly repeat the wounds of history? What is this life I had longed for? *DISCLAIMER!* Please be advised that this book contains sensitive and potentially triggering content, including but not limited to self-harm, physical and sexual abuse, and other traumatic events. These events are depicted in a fictional manner and should not be taken as a guide for real-life actions. The novel does not promote or normalize suicide in any way. If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, please seek help from a professional.

Haruki_Vanz · Hiện thực
Không đủ số lượng người đọc
33 Chs

Chapter 8 Circle Of New Friends, Future, and Confusion

Chapter 8 Circle Of New Friends, Future, and Confusion.

As our teacher handed us the big and wide sheet of paper, excitement coursed through my veins. Finally, I had a group to work with. It was a novel experience for me, someone who had always been an outcast in group activities. But even with that newfound joy, a strange feeling crept in, a sense of discomfort that I couldn't shake off.

  Determined not to ruin this opportunity, I took a deep breath and sat down with my group on the floor, forming a circle around the sheet of paper. To my left sat the lawyer's son, who carefully laid the paper down and straightened it. To my right sat my previously silent classmate, who had now spoken up, followed by the beautiful kid beside her. Next to the beauty was the delinquent guy, who still had a serious expression, but his demeanor towards me seemed to have softened. 

And lastly, the energetic yet airheaded girl.

  As we sat around the paper, the lawyer spun the colored pens in his hand, his eyes fixed on the blank canvas. The quiet girl next to me placed the pens near her mouth, her long, shiny black hair covering one eye, but I could see the other eye focused on the paper. She looked gloomy, but not as gloomy as before. I couldn't help but think that she and I had something in common - we were both victims of bullying. She always wore earphones, living in her own world, but now she was here, socializing with the group. I couldn't help but admire her beauty, even though she preferred to be alone.

  My first crush was also holding the colored pens tightly and placing them on her legs. She had a fierce face but still looked so beautiful. I couldn't help but stare at her. She looked so elegant while kneeling on the floor with a straight back. Her white dress with a blue ribbon in the middle was simple yet stunning, and she wore her signature red rose hair pin, which complemented her emerald eyes perfectly.

  Being a star before, I always saw her on television wearing elegant dresses, but now, even in simple clothes, she still looked elegant. Everything seemed to slow down when I looked at her. I couldn't help but be mesmerized by her beauty.

  Again, I didn't realize that I was staring at her until she lifted her eyes from the paper to meet mine. Our eyes locked, and I saw her emerald eyes shining brightly. "It's so elegant… Oh, no, what am I doing again?!" I quickly avoided eye contact and looked towards the delinquent guy. She must think that I'm a creep after all.

He sat across from me, arms crossed, lost in thought. His mullet hair gave off bad boy vibes, and he had always intimidated me. But now, he didn't seem to mind me anymore...at least not yet. As for the energetic girl, she fidgeted with her pens on her short, reddish hair, staring up at the ceiling.

As I glanced at the lawyer's son, I expected him to have an idea first as he usually does. But to my surprise, he was taking it seriously just like the rest of us.

  "Why is this task so difficult?" I muttered to myself, watching my peers as they dove deep into their future selves. They were all enthusiastically drawing and discussing how their future aspirations could contribute to society.

  "I want to become a policeman!" exclaimed one of them, while another chimed in, "Then I'll be the criminal, HAHAHA!" "Hey, stop fooling around!"

  I couldn't help but notice how they were all having fun while we were struggling to come up with any ideas. And honestly, I couldn't blame them. Unlike them, I had no clear plans or dreams for my future.

  The truth is, I don't have any prospects in my life. I often find myself wondering if I even have any dreams to strive for. The future me, if I'm being honest, is just an average guy, working various jobs to make ends meet.

  I'm an all-around washer at a restaurant during the day, but that alone isn't enough to pay for my expenses. So, I work as a housekeeper in a condominium at night just to make ends meet. My life isn't anything to be proud of, and I don't see any extraordinary progress happening in my life anytime soon.

  As I glanced back at my peers, it was clear that they were still engrossed in their ideas, while I was stuck in my own thoughts. "Do I even have a future to look forward to?" I couldn't help but ask myself.

The circle was quiet for a long moment, the air thick with anticipation. Finally, the lawyer's son spoke up. "Okay guys, what do you want to be in the future?" His question hung in the air, waiting for someone to take the bait.

  Silence descended once more, and we all glanced at each other, unsure of what to say. Our minds were blank, devoid of any aspirations or dreams. That was until the delinquent guy broke the silence.

  "What if…" He trailed off, uncertain. "What if we just put the professions or jobs of our parents? Or can we just get an idea about it? For example-" He gestured towards the lawyer's son. "Both of your parents are lawyers, right? So I think you should also want to be like them."

The lawyer's son's eyebrows furrowed in contemplation. "Alright. If I am a lawyer, you should be a journalist like your father." He turned to the delinquent boy, who reluctantly nodded his head.

  Next, the lawyer's son turned to me. "Justin, you could be a city mayor like your father." He suggested, and I shook my head immediately.

  "Me? As a city mayor? No way." I protested, the idea of following in my father's footsteps repulsing me. I'd always thought politicians were corrupt and greedy, just educated robbers. But maybe I was wrong.

  I glanced at the quiet girl next to me, and she met my gaze, silently urging me to continue. 

  "You?-" I started to ask her, but she interrupted me.

  "My father is your family's driver." She sighed, and then turned to my crush, who was seated next to her. "How about you? You'll be an actress like your mother, right?" Her words caught me off guard. My crush's mother was an actress? That was news to me.

  The beautiful girl hesitated, but finally nodded. "Y-yes," She murmured, her smile half-hearted.

It was now her turn to ask our last groupmate, who happened to be her oldest and closest friend. My crush hesitated to speak, but before she could, our energetic, airheaded classmate piped up. "My family is a farmer."

As we sat in our circle, having just shared our respective parents' professions, a sense of confusion and uncertainty hung in the air. It was time for us to start drawing, but we had no idea how those jobs could work together. We had a lawyer, a journalist, a city mayor, a driver, an actress, and a farmer. How could we possibly interconnect those vastly different professions? 

  The silence that followed was awkward, as we all looked at each other, unsure of how to proceed.

  The noise from the surrounding classroom seemed to fade away, leaving only the deafening silence. I turned to the lawyer's son, hoping he might have a solution. After all, he was the smartest kid in our class. "Hey, do you have any ideas for this?" I asked, hoping for some guidance.

  The lawyer's son pondered for a while. Finally, he lifted his eyeglasses and looked up at us. "I see… I… don't have any idea at all," he replied, his voice betraying a hint of disappointment.

  I couldn't believe it. If the smartest kid in our class had no idea, what hope did the rest of us have? It seemed like we were truly doomed. We were all quiet, lost in thought, trying to come up with a solution to this seemingly impossible problem.

CHAPTER 8 -END-