Chapter 19 : Body Back at Home - Heart Left In The Mountains

An expensive silver car was parked on the gravel road, when the servant saw the two young men coming out of the narrow hill, he hurriedly opened the back door.

Tay glanced at the man beside him who had been silent since the village and spoke up to reassure him: "Cry if you want to, no one will say."

Tian inhaled snot and took a deep breath, his long, thin face shakes slowly back and forth. "No, enough crying already."

Because he had been crying last night from the time he had separated from the man until he fell asleep at some point, the warmth of the rough palm touching his head had not faded away. It might be something else he needs to learn, because no matter how many tears are shed, he can't get something back.

"Aren't you surprised that no one came out looking for you?" Tay asked to change the mood.

"No but I can't find the answer, I'm not going back with it."

Tay smiled at the response which suited the brother he knew, "Your mother was so worried she nearly tore the house down, luckily Mr Teerayut insisted on letting his son go out into the world, otherwise you'd probably have been caught from the first day you set foot here."

"Actually, I can guess who said it…", because Tull the Bastard was the only one who knew about it and he was the last person to leave with him before it happened.

"But that's not to say Mr Teerayut was worried, he rushed to order my father to get someone to look after you immediately, how was that? Did he help?"

Tian turned her head away from the window to hide the traces of emotion that were settling in her heart." Yes, a lot."

So much so that I may never see anyone else who can do that to me.

"You haven't told me why you left home to become a volunteer teacher." Whatever Tay thought, he couldn't really think what had inspired the other man to decide to do it.

Tian turned to glance and whispered, "I thought Phii Tay already knew."

"If it's the organ donor thing I know but what I don't know is what you think…"

He held his breath for a moment before he relented: "I was bored, bored with everything, it's like it's impossible to find happiness in life , So I think, if you do something new you might find…", the trainee doctor frowned in confusion, born into money, raised with nothing to lose, someone who gets everything for him when he wants it, why does he end up saying he's unhappy.

"And now do you think you've found it?"

The beautiful, slender, glowing eyes unconsciously show melancholy to the shock of the person sitting next to her.

"I don't know, because I had to part before I had a chance to get to know him properly."

This is a reference to the villagers and children of Akha, isn't it?

Tay touched his face and then turned his eyes slightly out of the window to stare, because he didn't want to touch the emotional glands of his different blood brother any more.

About two hours later, the limousine stays in town to feed its occupants with breakfast, before setting off for its next destination in the capital, Bangkok.

The journey is silent with only the occasional conversation, as each is exhausted for many personal reasons.

Tian slept curled up in the soft, thick duvet Tay has prepared for the car, he sleeps for a long time, as if he wants to dream without ever waking up again.

But time never stops moving, at last, the expensive car pulls in and stops in front of the Sopasitsakul mansion after a ten-hour journey.

The woken man has to open the door sleepily but then a warm and gentle hug from someone wakes him up completely.

"Mama's baby boy!!! "Mrs Lalita had been waiting for this day for almost three months, every day for the past she had been worried about how her son was doing and she would have been worried sick if her husband's closest subordinate, Colonel Peetan, had not reported that he was fine.

"Mummy…", Tian felt reassured by her gentle touch, he reached out and hugged his plump body tightly while jokingly saying: "You've lost weight--" as soon as he said that, Mrs Lalita withdrew and slapped her hand on her son's upper arm.

"I'll scold you later!" You've run away and you're smiling at your mother.

Tian cried out in pain but when he looked into his mother's red eyes, he was overcome with remorse, he slowly raised his hand to the soft shoulder of his shirt and worshiped.

"I'm sorry, Mum."

Mrs Lalita was silent, as if shocked by her son's behaviour, so much so that she was at her wits end, since Tian had started puberty, he had been close to his friends and lovers, away from his parents' arms, like most boys, they were shy, ashamed when they showed love and gratitude to their parents.

Even though it is understood that this is natural, no parent wants this.

Mrs Lalita stroked the child's head in relief, "It's okay, I'm glad you're back safely."

She lifted the thin, slightly dark-looking face, then looked at the slight bruises on the facial bones and the corners of the mouth.

"See, all that good looks is gone and mum promises not to forbid Tian anything in the future, the boy can travel anywhere he wants but mum just asked that you don't risk your life on that mountain again!"

Tian held his breath for a moment at his mother's declaration, he didn't respond by averting his gaze obliquely but there was no momentum of defiance either, luckily his mother was too preoccupied with her worries to notice this little anomaly. Suddenly, his eyes darted to his father standing behind him.

"Dad…" The ex-high ranking officer smiled faintly, as if understanding the complex meaning conveyed in his young son's eyes, he walked over, tapped the thin shoulder a few times and whispered.

"We'll talk later, go and comfort your mother first."

Tian nodded, forcing himself to swallow every word and lets his mother drag him into the house.

The chandeliers in the living room dazzled him, the gold-trimmed Louis Vuitton sofas and Ming porcelain vases glittered, a sign of high society luxury.

He sighed as he looked around the once familiar but now unfamiliar luxury of the house.

A world of difference.

But this was his world.

Since they had rested for many hours on the way back to Bangkok, Tian couldn't sleep any more. Last night he played a computer game that he hadn't opened in a long time to help distract him from thinking about the mountain.

Like a freshly scabbed wound, if you accidentally touch it, be prepared for it to open up and hurt.

It took him almost half the night to feel sleepy again, the slender figure in the light, comfortable cotton pyjamas lying on the fabric softener-scented sheets, the air conditioning working quietly in the spacious rectangular room regulating the temperature for cool comfort.

Beautiful slender eyes squinting at the concrete ceiling, as if clearly seeing images of the past, it's too early to restrain feelings from forgetting those precious memories, then live as if nothing had happened.

Even though his heart was sobbing and writhing but Tian could only bear it, he closed his wet eyes and let time continue to heal his broken heart.

It's breakfast time in the Sopasitsakul household at 8 o'clock, Mum and the maid rush to get the full set of food and cutlery ready before the master came down to sit, the smell of rice floating in the air makes Pimprapa daughter and son run into the dining room at once.

Mrs. Lalita saw the visitors early in the morning and raised her eyebrows in surprise "What brought you here?"

"My husband has just returned from a visit to Switzerland yesterday, so he asked me to give something to Mum and Dad--" she replied, turning to the servant and shouting to tell him to be careful with the bag, as it was very expensive.

"You can come later, Mum is not going anywhere."

Pim doesn't care about her mother's jokes, in fact, she heard the news of her naughty brother's return, so she rushed to see him today, in order to witness what would happen to the mess and whimsically left home to become a volunteer teacher in the mountains, which would have killed anyone to hear.

Pim coughed and asked: "Is mummy's baby boy still awake?"

"Mummy hasn't asked anyone to wake him up, he must be tired, wants him to sleep comfortably."

"Yes, it's true that he's done some very troubling things in the past, spoiled children run away from home and make their parents worry "Don't blame your brother, as long as your brother is back safe, mummy will be happy."

"Mum just lets him be, he's the one who gets to behave." Pim couldn't help but be sarcastic, even though she knew that Tian was a child more than 10 year younger from his older siblings and was being raised in this way, she couldn't help but be disgusted.

She rolled her eyes until she saw a figure standing on the stairs behind her mother and pauses.

She don't know if he heard it from but her brother's expression was calm, not a sting, just starting as usual.

"I'm hungry, do you want to go and eat together?" he said in such a flat tone, that his sister almost fell without a word.

"Let's go--" Pim replied, shaking his head as he walked to the other side of the restaurant, not expecting to be greeted with a question about his intentions.

The General waited at a sumptuous teak table, the three grandchildren sit beside him and taking their rice and omelette with gusto, Pim raised his hand in salute to her father, then goes and sat in her own seat but still whispered a sarcastic remark to his little brother.

"Tum, don't sit on other people's land, son, the master is back."

Tian looked at the face of his older nephew, who was staring at him with a gleam in his eye and a spoon in his hand and said, "...I can sit anywhere, there's no need to move around." With that he moved the last chair and sat down.

The maid had the good sense to hurry up and warm up the lady, for fear of having something thrown at her for dawdling. Tian glanced at his father, who was in full dress today, guessing he was going out on business. He thought and sighed, it had been a long time since he had had a chance to have a serious conversation with his father.

Tian scanned the rows of delicious food, then picked the nearest plate, crispy fried egg, drained until dry but not greasy, the edges of the egg were burnt because the person who made it couldn't control the heat of the charcoal stove very well.

Just the first bite, the delicious taste made his eyes burn, remembering someone who taught him how to cook and he endured eating his own dark dish of scrambled vegetables without complaining a word.

Tian took a deep breath only to quickly reach into his mouth until it was more than half gone, Mrs Lalita watched her son's perverse reaction but she spoke before she could open her mouth to ask Tian.

"Mum, let the chef make me western food in the future."

"Why? Are you tired of eating this basic food in the mountains? As said, it probably doesn't suit your luxury preferences." said Pim with a scornful grin, "Eventually, he couldn't bear to come back to his misery and when he heard the last words, Tian sprang to his feet, so that the wooden chair shifted backwards and made a loud noise against the floor.

"You should have let me stay there for the rest of my life, I can stay too!"

"But Mum won't let you!" The mother shrieked in horror and then turned to stop her trouble-making daughter, "Pim, don't say anything about it, or you won't have to borrow Mum's jewellery for the party next week."

Pim quickly shut up and concentrated on her breakfast, Mrs Lalita rushed over to Tian and stroked his arm to calm him down, because she was really scared that he would look at her with such determination and do what he said he would do.

"Sit down first, son. In a minute Mummy will make you some toast and jam and bring fresh milk and orange juice and you will be full."

Tian had to do what his mother wanted, because he didn't want any problems. As he waited for the toast to be finished, he lifted a glass of fresh milk to drink and suddenly found his niece sitting next to him staring at him.

Tam reached out and poked his index finger on her uncle's lavender-tinted photo gang, "did it hurt?"

In the past, he would have said to his naughty nephews, "It's none of your business," but was discouraged by the innocence hidden in his eyes, naughty as he was, he was just a child who didn't know any better.

"It doesn't hurt, it will heal."

"Mum said, Uncle Tian likes to argue with people and is covered in cuts."

"And does Tam believe it?"

The child nodded without thinking, "Yes, Uncle Tian likes to shout at us."

When he receives an innocent response from his six year old nephew, Tian is silenced by guilt.

"This emperor will not shout anymore but if you want to play with anything of uncle's you have to ask me first, got it?"

"Will you let me play with it after I ask?"

"Yeah…" Tian answered in a firm voice: "But if you break it, you will be punished."

Tam shouted his mouth to show that he had received the condition, then turned his attention to the cake the grandmother had asked the maid to bring, Tian spread the jam on the bread and ate some, then said that the doctor had called to say he had to go to the hospital today and left.

A European branded red-coloured four-door car is parked in the front yard of the house waiting, replacing the old sports car he abandoned when he fled to the mountains, because he didn't want to go back to racing. This one he finds fine and even nice, the Maserati Gran Turisimo is hard to drive on Thai streets.

Tian took the keys from the chauffeur at the luxury house and opened the door to sit down, the feel of the cushions and modern technology brought a smile to thin lips, however, he doesn't feel any safer than in the back seat of the old motorbike with the tall officer.

He let go of all thoughts, adjusted the rear view mirror slightly, grabbed a pair of sunglasses and put them on, before slowly pressing the accelerator pedal and driving the million dollar car, straight out of the fence immediately.

It had been almost two weeks since Tian had returned to Bangkok to live his normal life but for some reason he felt very busy going anywhere. Mrs Lalita cried and forced him to go to social events, leaving no day free, or sometimes coaxes him to take his friend's daughter shopping and to the movies, as if he would try to escape again if left alone at home.

Tian sighed deeply, he wasn't angry at his mother for being nosy, he was just tired. Luckily today he had the chance to get away and go back to university to continue his studies without having to wait for days to hear his mother's nagging.

The famous university in the centre of the city was packed with students late at night and cars parked along the road, so that it was overcrowded, he had just gone into the administration building to register his application and then went to the engineering school in order to talk to his tutor.

The friends of the same age who studied with him in his last academic year saw a man who had not been seen for a long time and flocked to him to ask him about the illness that had made him stop studying.

But it's an intimacy that seems strangely distant and even so, Tian doesn't want to blame anyone, because from the day he is diagnosed with myocarditis, he turned his back on his friends who have a bright future ahead of them and then destroys the rest of his life by making friends with a bunch of high society thugs.

Without Mr. Torfan's "heart", he might not be standing here anymore.

Tian reached up and touched his left breast, then took off and sat down on the bleachers next to the basketball court where the boys were playing, strangely enough, after he had made his intentions clear to Phabandao, his inner beating heart seemed to give in, there was no more stubborn resistance to the pain like pins and needles.

Tian rested his head on the half-moon staircase behind him, as if his strength was gone, his body was here but his mind was somewhere else. The question is, how will he endure the rest of his life? While all thoughts remain but many memories are in that village. Tian lifted his palms to cover his face, which was distorted by his unstable emotions.

How much longer will the torture last? Is it because of this? That's why you told me to "forget everything. The phone rings suddenly, so suddenly that the slender body is startled, he stops to look at the unfamiliar number displayed on the screen but tries to answer it anyway, the low, stern voice rings out from the end of the line as if it were a bright light in a dark world.

"Hello, Tian..."

Teacher Winai! You, hello."

"How are you? I've been trying to call you since the day you came back but I'm afraid you're still tired."

"I'm sorry I haven't contacted you…", Tian replied intermittently, "I'm just finishing up at home and going back to school to continue my studies."

"That's okay, I understand. I understand." said the head of the Saengthong Charitable Foundation in a kind tone.

"You wanted to talk?" Tian gulped heavily, fearing that the secret of being a volunteer teacher might have been revealed.

"Yes, let's talk, because you haven't come back to answer my questions like you promised."

The listener is silent for a moment and then agrees.

"Okay, I'll be there this afternoon."

The luxurious European car drives slowly down a quiet alley in the Toniang area, Tian pulled up in a car next to an old brick wall with the Foundation's logo on the fence gate. As he approached, he heard the screams of children, as if they were doing some activity inside.

A slender hand was about to guard the iron latch but it opened first and there appeared before him the teacher Winai, a chubby figure still dressed as usual in a faded navy Northern Thai lace-up cardigan.

"Welcome home, Teacher Tian."

The word 'teacher' after his name, makes his heart beat faster, Tian shakes his head, "Don't call me that, I'm not even close to it."

The aged man in charge smiled broadly, looking at the visitor's clothes and shoes, head to toe designer as usual but the atmosphere is a little different.

"You look very different."

Tian raised his eyebrows in a questioning manner, Phii Winai stared into the light brown eyes and said: "Your eyes are not bright anymore."

It was as if someone had read his mind, his hand trembled rapidly as he carried the bag of basic school supplies from the university co-op shop.

"Teacher, I..."

"No need to say anything, come in and talk."

"Come in…" interjects Mr Winai, as he walks the young man out onto the lawn, where the children of the orphanage are bouncing and playing happily with the nursery teacher. In the distance, a brown wooden pavilion stood in the middle of a garden full of tall trees.

Watching the leaves swaying rhythmically in the wind, calms the confused mind. He sat down on a chair in the gazebo, opposite the head of the Foundation and they took time to relax, then resume the conversation.

"To be honest, I am surprised that you have stayed in Phabandao for more than two months."

Tian smiled sadly but like the teacher had belittled me I didn't stay the whole term."

"But I'm sure, if there hadn't been such a dangerous event to intervene, you would have been able to stay there the whole time."

"It happened because of me…", the more I said, the more my thin face fell like remorse, "I almost took the village headman's son to his death.

"Don't think too much about it, it's all in the past--" Phii Winai spoke soothingly but the listener could not help but pour out his own feelings.

"Even though I'm back, my heart misses the place, the children taught me to give, the people in the village taught me to value my own values, even though we were together for a short time, they became the best things in my life."

Including the tall officer who taught him about "love." that can ignore the limits of all the rules in the world.

Clear tears poured down quietly, expressing all that was in the heart that could not be expressed in words. Phii Winai looks compassionately at the man with red eyes, like someone who has experienced a lot of warmth and coldness.

"Did you finally find the answer you were looking for?"

Tian took a few deep breaths to calm and clear his head and said: "I didn't think that someone who only caused trouble for his parents could benefit others in this way."

"That's because you have it but they "don't." have it."

He nodded in agreement, "The villagers had given back so much to outsiders like me, that I didn't want to go back to society in the city."

The man in charge shook his head gently and began to understand the reason for Tian's depression.

"Tian, I think you're lost."

"Is it wrong to want to stay where it makes us feel good?" the brow furrowed. The brow furrowed. "So tell me why you're not struggling to get back out there now, the criminals are in jail, things should be quiet for a while, I could send you."

Tian froze at these words, there was a hint of hesitation and confusion in his long, thin eyes, even if he had to go back, he couldn't do it. As soon as he looked at his mother's worried face, he realised that he was just a "child" who could not survive without his parents, and that his studies were not over, and that he still had to ask for money.

Although he knew it well, he wanted to continue to be obstinate.

The slender figure raises his hand to his forehead, like someone who is in a state of disarray, "I just don't want everything to be a passing memory."

"But our lives must go on, Nong Tian, don't spoil the future with your own persistence, you know you can't volunteer there for the rest of your life, what about the family waiting for you? Can you throw it away?"

The other person still had his head in his hands and didn't answer, so the head of the foundation stood up, moved himself to sit next to him, and said softly, "I'm telling you, a gentleman called the first day you left for Chiangrai."

"My father, right?" Just the big smile on Mr. Winai's face, he already guessed that he was right.

"He asked about you coming to talk to the Foundation and deciding to just write a letter and run away, I didn't think it would turn out to be such a big deal myself, so I offered to get you back, but what he said that day was: I hope he thinks well, and does well, whatever the child wants to be, the parents can and will only support it unconditionally." The old teacher patted him on the shoulder, as if to encourage.

"So, the past may be the future you choose, but I hope you try to do well in the present."

Just one short sentence, and it helped to dispel the fog that had completely clouded his mind. A bright sparkle suddenly appeared in his melancholy eyes, Tian slowly raised his hand in gratitude and saluted the teacher with a clasp of his hands, not only for the lessons he had learned, but also for providing a route to life.

"Thank you, I too am eagerly awaiting the day that will come."

His smooth, handsome face looked peaceful, as if his mind and heart had grown into an adult, and he wanted to gamble with time, to see how strong and solid the feelings he would finally have.

Can you guarantee it? No matter how long it takes, you'll be there for me.

It seems that good luck always comes with bad luck. Although Tian's body has fully recovered from his surgery, his suspension from the first semester of his junior year has now forced him to start studying again with his younger siblings, tired of being carried here and there by his mother, Tian has been taking elective courses since the start of the summer in April to escape her torment.

He spent his time at home and at university, until the start of the new academic year. It was strange, though, his peers were graduating, and he had to sit with the younger students who had raised their hands in salute.

Tian sat at the back of the class taking notes, not normally a very studious or hard-working person, but his past teaching experience made him realise that if he didn't do it today, he might not be able to make up for it tomorrow.

---