First time

"Joy was born one month premature" said Natasha as she looked at her hot cup of tea in her hands.

"I didn't get to hold her when she was born" said Natasha.

"They took her to the incubator" said Natasha as she looked up at Lulu who looked like she was on the verge of tears.

"While I was being cleaned up, the nurses noticed that the hospital bed was soaked with blood, and it was not from the delivery" said Natasha.

"It turns out that I over pushed, and I ended up tearing" said Natasha.

"I was losing a lot of blood and I started to feel light headed, the nurses called for the Doctor immediately" said Natasha.

"There was no time for me to be prepped up for surgery, and there was no time for me to be given anaesthesia, the Doctor had to stich me up as soon as possible, It was extremely painful, I felt so much pain, that is the second worst pain I have felt in my entire life" said Natasha.

"I was given a blood transfusion since I lost a lot of blood, and I did not wake up until a few hours later" said Natasha.

"Once I woke up, they brought my baby to me, healthy and well…" said Natasha as she smiled.

"When I held her in my arms for the first time, I just… I can't explain it, but I just felt so many emotions at once, relief, love… but most of all Joy… she was my little bundle of Joy literally" said Natasha as she smiled and Lulu smiled.

"I had not thought of a name for her, but right there, as I held her, I knew that her name was going to be Joy… because she just brought me so much Joy, I felt proud… proud to be her mother" said Natasha.

"I knew that I was going to protect her all my life, because she was mine… she was my daughter" said Natasha as she felt tears coming, but she did not allow them fall.

"It was like a miracle, she was one month premature, but she was just as healthy as any other baby" said Natasha as she smiled.

"They had run some tests on her, and they all came back positive, she was fine" said Natasha.

"Joy weighed three pounds when I gave birth to her" said Natasha as she looked at Lulu and Lulu smiled.

"At that point in time, all I could think of was how Dom would accept her, I knew that she was his… she was his daughter as well, but I also knew that I could expect nothing from him until the DNA tests were run" said Natasha.

"All I wanted was that he did not neglect his own daughter, and to my luck, Grandfather told me that when Dom saw Joy for the first time… he knew that she was his daughter, he didn't need any DNA test to know that she was his daughter" said Natasha as she smiled, she didn't want to cry, no not at all.

"I just felt so relieved, like a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders" said Natasha as she smiled.

"I had to stay in the hospital for three more days, until I was discharged, and in those three days, your brother did not come and visit me at all, but I didn't mind at the time, I only cared that he cred for his daughter" said Natasha and Lulu just sat there listening, she did not know what to say at all.

"When I was discharged, Grandfather got me a nanny, to help me take care of Joy while I was at school, the nanny worked from 6-5, and once she went home, I took care of Joy alone, your brother would only carry her once or twice when he came back from work, and of course he would ignore me, but I was used to it at that point" said Natasha.

"When I used to breastfeed Joy, I just felt so irked with her, I did not know why at the time, but it turned out that I suffered from postpartum depression, I had thoughts of killing my baby, and then myself" said Natasha.

"I ended up getting over it, but during those times, I just felt so alone" said Natasha.

"Why didn't you tell Grandfather?" asked Lulu as her heart ached.

"Well I did not want to worry him, and besides, I knew that the only help he could offer to me was that I see a therapist, but I didn't want that, I didn't want to talk to someone who was paid to listen to all my problems" said Natasha as she scoffed.

"But you needed to talk to someone…" said Lulu.

"Why didn't you talk to me?" asked Lulu as Natasha started laughing while Lulu didn't know what was so funny.

"Oh Lulu, that's sweet of you now, but back then, you were at boarding school, you had your own life to live, and I am sure that you did not need to hear about all the life problems of your sister in law who you didn't even like" said Natasha as she stopped laughing.

"That's not true Natasha… I have always liked you" said Lulu.

"Really?" asked Natasha.

"Because it never seemed like you liked me Lulu" said Natasha.

"I always liked you Natasha, it was only Lia I didn't like, and I think that was maybe because my little bratty self always wanted attention on me and me alone" said Lulu.

"But for you, I always liked you, I thought you were cool, I mean the guys always liked you, you were always the nicest and, you used to bake me cookies" said Lulu as she smiled and Natasha laughed.

"I am glad that you remember my cookies" said Natasha as she laughed.

"Oh Natasha, it's not only about the cookies, I used to look up to you" said Lulu.

"But then, you didn't, I mean it was like I irked you every time you saw me, you always frowned" said Natasha.

"Natasha I don't know why, but maybe my little pampered mind couldn't accept the fact that I wouldn't be the only woman in Dom's life anymore" said Lulu as she sighed.

"I mean, I was always his little sister, he always looked after me, and then when the announcement came that you two were getting married, I thought that you were taking my brother away from me, that's why I was cold to you… and for that I am sorry" said Lulu as she sighed, she knew that she had been acting like a brat, Natasha did not deserve that at all, she had been through too much already.

"I was never upset with you Lulu, I understood that you and your brother are very close, and I never wanted to take your place, not at all" said Natasha as Lulu smiled, she knew that now.

"So… did things between you and Dom get better?" asked Lulu as Natasha sighed.

"I wish… but they got worse" said Natasha.

"I mean… I kept on apologizing to him, even though I did not know what I was apologizing for" said Natasha.

"And still he didn't care, it wasn't until Joy turned two that I decided that I was not going to take his nonsense anymore, for crying out loud, I was a victim as well, I suffered more than he did, with all the backlash and everything" said Natasha.

"But the problem was that I still loved him, you can't drive out a nail with another nail can you now?" asked Natasha as Lulu shook her head.

"I became obsessive, I was seriously obsessed with him, I forced my way into his life, in the name that I was his wife, I moved into his room even though he hated it, but he couldn't care less, he tried everything to get me to leave him alone, but I didn't" said Natasha.

"Grandfather sent Alfred over, he used him to keep an eye on us, I guess to Grandfather we could still reconcile" said Natasha.

"We always ended up in heated arguments…" said Natasha as she looked down.

"Did Dom get physical with you?" asked Lulu as now she was worried.

"No, of course not, he's too gentle to" said Natasha as she looked up and she smiled.

"But sometimes I wished that he did… because once he opened his mouth, he would say things… things that no woman should hear from someone she loved… whenever we argued and he argued back, it was like my heart exploded, the things he said, killed me on the inside, over, and over again" said Natasha.

"Things went on like that….and then…" said Natasha.

"I died" said Natasha as Lulu thought that Natasha was speaking figuratively.

"Oh Natasha I… I don't know what to say" said Lulu as she now felt guilty, she had opened a wound hadn't she?

"Then don't say anything, I just told you the story of what happened" said Natasha as she smiled.

"Do you hate him?" asked Lulu.

"*Sigh*, No, of course I don't hate him" said Natasha as she sighed, it was hard for her to say, but it was the truth.

"Look, if there is anything that I have learnt so far, its that life is too short, for you to hold a grudge on someone for so long" said Natasha.

"I do agree that Dom could have handled things differently, but what is done is done, we learn as he go, and well I forgive him, I really do" said Natasha as she nodded her head.

"So…" asked Lulu.

"Look Lulu, your brother is a business man, he knows that in a partnership, all partners are separately and jointly liable for all the liabilities in a business" said Natasha.

"He should let it be like that with Joy" said Natasha.

"We can both be there for her when we need to be there, and when we can handle things on our own, we can do that as well" said Natasha.

"After all, she is as much his daughter as she is mine" said Natasha.

"And I know that he Is a good father" said Natasha.

"You don't want a relationship?" asked Lulu.

"No far from that Lulu, I want nothing of that sort, look I may have forgiven your brother, but a relationship is the last thing on my mind" said Natasha as she sighed.

"So you have given up on love?" asked Lulu as that was not fair, Natasha did not have to do that just because of her stupid brother.

"Yes, I have, the only person's love that Is that of my daughter's, she's my little joy, my angel from heaven" said Natasha as she smiled and Lulu smiled.

"But that's not fair Natasha… you deserve to be happy" said Lulu.

"Who says that I am not happy?" asked Natasha as she smiled.

"I don't think that you need a man in your life to feel happy and fulfilled now do you?" asked Natasha as she smiled.

"I guess you are right" said Lulu as she smiled, she was going to hit her idiotic big brother on his big head after this, he really made Natasha suffer, and just because he was so stupid, she was so glad that she heard Natasha's side of the story.

"What about you, aren't you going to bring a boyfriend home soon?" asked Natasha as she smiled, she knew that it was time to change the topic.

"Oh me?? No, no, please don't ask that, Grandfather just asked me that exact same question yesterday, and let me just say that your Grandfather asking about your love life isn't cool at all" said Lulu as she laughed and she shook her head as Natasha shook her head and she laughed.

"So you don't have one?" asked Natasha as she laughed.

"Pleaseee, not at all, why?? So my family can scare him off with their many questions, I would rather stay single, besides, I'm only twenty, I can bring a guy home when I'm thirty" said Lulu as she laughed.

"Ummm, I am sure your mom would be worried if you wait that long" said Natasha as she laughed.

"Well she shouldn't she has Joy as a granddaughter already doesn't she?" asked Lulu as she laughed and Natasha laughed, she did not remember the last time she laughed like this, that was why she liked Lulu, she was always so simple and herself.

"Speaking of Joy, I wonder why it is taking her so long to pick flowers" said Natasha as she smiled.

"Let me go check on her" said Natasha as she stood up.

"Oh alright then" said Lulu as she stood up as well.

"Can… can I have a hug first?" asked Lulu as she hesitated.

"Of course Lulu, you can" said Natasha as she smiled and Lulu walked to hug her.

"I'm sorry" said Lulu as she hugged Natasha.

"For what?" asked Natasha as she smiled.

"For my brother, for my parents, for everyone not believing you" said Lulu.

"Don't be, it was their mistake and not yours Lulu" said Natasha as she smiled.

"I know, but I'm still sorry" said Lulu.

"Thank you, for being so nice to me Lulu" said Natasha as she smiled and Lulu broke their hug as she smiled and Natasha walked away.

Lulu smiled, now it was time for her to go and talk to her idiotic brother.