[61.3] Reika POV: The Darkness in Her Heart

[Author's note: This part of the chapter is back to Reika's perspective.]

I let out a sigh as I walked across the Academy grounds. I couldn't handle being locked up any longer and decided I need to go on a walk outside. I stood on top of a staircase and overlooked the entire Academy. I leaned down on the railing and propped up my chin, "If I don't have permanent brain damage from all the times I've hit my head, then I should try buying a lottery ticket."

"Reika."

I jumped and turned around to see Felix with bags under his eyes. His eyes were darker than usual as he stared in a daze without any sign of a smile.

I tilted my head, "Oh hey, Felix…. Are you feeling okay?"

He mustered a forced smile, "I just had… To heal a lot of people. I needed a break."

I patted the spot next to me, "Do you want to join me? They won't let me help with anything because they said I'm 'injured'. Can you believe that?"

He walked over to my side and pushed back my hair to carefully assess my scalp, "Your injuries healed at least."

I pushed away his hand and fixed my hair, "I'm assuming you are the one who healed me again?"

He smiled helplessly, "Guilty as charged."

"You're really good at that. I don't think I've met another person who can heal others like you do."

"Well… I never used to be good at it."

"You have since I've known you."

He let out a sigh and gazed into the distance, "Before that, I wasn't very good."

"What changed?"

He gave me a sly smile, "I met someone who completed me."

I teased him, "Sounds like a love story."

"Hah! Not a very good love story." He drummed his fingers along the railing before facing me with a smile, "How would you feel about a walk to the forest? Everyone is inside right now so there's no one around. It will probably be relaxing."

I gave a nod, "Why not? It's not like I'm doing anything."

I followed Felix off of the balcony and to the Academy grounds where we headed off to the forest attached. First, we stopped at the lake where I picked up a rock and started skipping it, "Aren't you worried about your family, Felix?"

He picked up a rock and skipped it with me, "I don't have a family anymore."

I looked at him in surprise, "W-What do you mean?"

He stared at the rock in his hands and rolled it around on his palm, "They are all gone now…"

"Don't say that!" I quickly grabbed his hand causing the rock to fall to the ground, "You don't know if they are gone. You have to have hope."

A somber smile appeared on his face, "...Thanks, Reika. Unfortunately, I'm all out of hope now."

My eyebrows pinched together, "Felix…"

He let out a sigh and turned to walk along the water's edge. I quickly followed after him, stealing glances at his face to make sure he was okay. However, the dark expression on his face never receded. Suddenly, he turned to look at me.

"How are you and Cyrus doing?"

I flinched and averted my gaze as a blush appeared on my cheeks, "O-Oh… We are good."

"No problems?"

"No… Not really." I twisted my hair shyly, "Although thanks to everything going on, I haven't had any chance to spend any quality time with him."

"So you're not worried at all?"

My footsteps slowed, "What would I be worried about?"

"You're not worried he will hurt you?"

I pinched my eyebrows together as my footsteps stopped. I turned around slowly, "Why would he hurt me?"

Felix stared at me without expression, making my heart start pounding with anxiety.

He spoke slowly, "Well… You never really know a person. You know that more than anyone."

"What… What are you talking about?"

He stepped closer to me, staring down at me with empty eyes, "He will be kind at first. He will give you the world and tell you all the things you want to hear. Then when he has you in his grip, he will take everything from you. First, it will be just simple jealousy. You'll think it's harmless. Slowly, he will pull you away from your friends and family. He will isolate you… Then when you have no one left, you'll finally belong to him."

I shrank back, "F-Felix… Stop-"

"-Isn't he doing that now? Think about it. When have you last seen your friends? Whatever happened to Hazel? And Rebecca? And as for his jealousy… Is he really okay with you being alone with me? And what about Zephyr? The two of them are always fighting because he sees Zephyr as a rival even though he's clearly just a friend to you…"

My breathing raced as I glanced around in a panic.

H-Has he?

Has he been tricking me this entire time?

"Oh, Reika…" He pushed back a piece of my hair, "Stupid, stupid, Reika. You've fallen for the same trap, once again. Same trap. Different man."

"I-I-I-I-"

He placed his hands on my shoulder, "But isn't that your punishment? After all, you killed your own brother. You tore apart your entire family. But you wouldn't stop at that. You brought life into that world, just to allow it to be taken away. When your friend wanted to help, you caused her to lose her life. Then, you even caused your beloved art museum to burn to the ground. Just how many lives did you ruin?"

I felt something wet roll down my cheeks as my breathing grew painful. I whimpered, "No… I… It… It wasn't my fault…"

"-And now look. You've come to this world and ruined it just like you did with your last one. Your Uncle died trying to give you a good life. Your mother was burned alive even though she just wanted to help you. Face it, Reika. Everything you touch get's ruined. Your existence is only to cause pain and suffering to others."

The corners of my vision started to blur and soon, all I could see was vibrant orange eyes peering at me through the darkness.

"Face it, Reika. It was all your fault."

He's…

He's right.

I let all of that happen.

I caused all of it.

I finally gave in to the creeping darkness, sobbing as I felt something crawl inside my heart.

"I… I deserved it. I deserved everything that happened to me back then."

I don't deserve this life.