AM ATTRACTED TO YOU.

" How wrong ?" He ask surprising me , what does he mean by 'how wrong ? I mean , it's wrong in every possible way .

" It's just hugging, why are you making so much fuse about it , why are trying to make it like am harassing you? You were hugging me back few minutes ago so why are you fighting now?" He says still not willing to let me go .

" This is wrong " I repeat.

But he ignore me like he hasn't heard , I stand there speechlessly listening to his drumming heart .

" Can you feel my heart? Maya , this is what happens to it everytime you are close to , even when I just think about you ."

I want to say something but I don't know what ..

" Am attracted to you  , I fell in love with you Maya , you are the reason why I rejected  princess Fernanda, because for some reason I think I found out the kind of a person I want . Not just a person in the name of a wife but a person I really want , a friend ,," He adds after realising that am not saying anything.

" Wha.. what are you.. talking about?! Is this how you always treat your servants?"

" Trust me when I say I've never even remembered their names , they were still serving me but I couldn't remember their faces when we meet outside , I never let them spent much time in my room like you do , only if they have important duties to do like cleaning, I've never seen you as my servant from the first day ."

" Thank you but I cant take your offer. " I say trying to stay calm of which I cant . I don't even know if my answer make sense.

" What offer ? This is not an offer , this is me  asking you out "

" And this is me saying no , please accept my answer, if it doesn't please you then you can throw me out of the palace or have me killed , I don't know, anything that will make you feel better "

" You think I can do any of those things you are suggesting to the person am helplessly in love with? "

" I can't accept your love , your highness "

" Don't call me that ,,

..you know Earlier today when I went out with my father he asked me why there's so much change in me and I told him am experiencing something new in my life , am falling in love and it's destructing me , I told him my feelings for you , he doesn't care the girl I have as long as I am happy and I'll be able to do my duties right , so if you are worried about them you don't hav.."

" What did you just say?!" I ask managing to move away from him this time . I look at him completely shocked. I can't believe this has come this far!

" I told my father about my feelings for you and he is totally fine with it . " he repeats with  a hint of happiness in his voice .

" I've told you I can't , am not the person you think I am , am not the right person for you! What don't you understand in that simple sentence?"

" You don't get to tell me that because am the one with the feelings, I know what I feel towards you , so wether you think you are not the right person , am the one to decide that , am gonna give you time to think about it , if you really don't feel anything like this towards me then I'll try my best to make you love me too because it's you I want and leaving you alone is not an option for me."

" There's nothing to think about, your highness . A 'NO' has always been a complete sentence to me and it should be respected,,," I say storming out of the room .

I feel so confused and dizzy . Why is this happening to me ?! Am very much sure if I were a girl he wouldn't have fallen for me! But just because am a boy and this wants to make it hard for me , he falls for me! Is he even being serious ?

I walk to the servant's quarters , usually we share rooms five female servants per room, when I enter , I walk straight to my wooden bed and cover myself completely, I hear whispers which I ignore, people always talk about me because am always around Arthur but am used to them so.. 

Inside the blanket tears flow out of my eyes continuously.. I've never regretted being born a man in my life like now .

I honestly won't be able to sleep now so I can as well stop forcing myself to , I want to go out but it's against the rules , only guards are found out there at this time .

,,,,Just as I was starting to experience some happiness once in my life , it's snatched away .

I don't even want to think of my feelings for him now , I shouldn't have let him hug me in the first place , the stupid me stood there embracing him back ,

I need to leave this place ! If I don't they are going to order me to marry him now that the king is fine with it . And then what? What will I do if that happens. I have no power to reject their order.

Seems the heavens wanted me to run from this place too that's why they sent me a helper , Michael.. I'll have to ask Michael to get me out of this place tomorrow .

,,,The rest of the night I stay awake listening to people snoring softly , enjoying their sleep until dawn.