TWENTY

Alhamdulillah, I'm happy to be able to eat together at the dining table with your favorite son," he said, making me melt. I could see his face glowing. His face radiated happiness.

"You can do it!" I said, showing my teeth in front of him.

"Hold on, Ri, I want to invite mom to have breakfast together here." he said excitedly, he put down the spoon and entered his wife's room.

I heard the insistent conversation. Father came out with a disappointed look. His eyes dropped down witheringly.

Behind his back. I saw the woman who was his wife come out by rudely opening the curtains. Then went towards the bathroom with the baby.

Father exhaled his weak breath. I saw his hand resting on his chin and dreamily staring blankly.

"Sir..." I called out as I touched his arm. I hoped my sincere touch would make him patient with his wife's behavior.

But he only replied.

"Finish your meal. I'm going to work. Here's some money for you. I hope you find a job soon." The father then left, leaving behind a lot of food. He was very eager to finish his breakfast. However, because of that woman, he became like this.

"Yes, sir. Thank you." I said, reaching for the fifteen thousand coins on the table.

I looked at my father who was leaving with slow steps. While I looked at my food reluctantly. It felt like my appetite was eroding. But I forced myself to finish my meal. Because I have to fight for myself. I will take care of my health to take care of father.

In between my meals. I heard the father's wife bathing her child while babbling.

"What a useless old man. Why should I have a husband like him? Fate! Fate!"

I heard Bening crying. Her cry was like a scream but not a whimper. I felt sorry for Bening who was still a baby.

"Can't you shut up, you keep crying!"

I heard Bening's voice crying even louder. I couldn't let anything bad happen to Bening. Could that woman have hit Bening?

I quickly stepped into the bathroom. Although my mouth was still chewing roughly.

"Ma'am, you can't be like that with a child! Poor Bening," I exclaimed, boldly staring at the face of my father's wife.

"I have nothing to do with you! Bening is my child! It's up to me!" she shouted as she hurriedly picked up the baby and wrapped her in a towel.

"Get out of my way!" she snapped, leaving me to feel sorry for Bening.

"Astaghfirullah hal adzim!" my hand stroked my chest quickly. I wanted to scream for justice. I really felt sorry for Bening. The five-month-old baby was being mistreated.

My eyes glazed over instantly. My heart ached. I wanted so badly to be next to that little boy. So that I could continue to take care of her.

Maybe I don't know what it's like to be a mother with such a small child. Maybe I also don't know what it's like to take care of a baby while working like your wife.

I wiped the tears that had been falling down my cheeks. I quickly cleaned up the mess on the dining table. I can't be sad today. I'm going to apply for a job. I looked at the clock on the wall and saw that it was 7 o'clock.

***

I'm currently walking to the restaurant in front of the hospital where my father was treated. Every step I take, I think of that baby's face. She had a clear face as her name suggests. Her eyes were completely innocent and didn't know anything. I had kissed her when I was leaving and I tried to judge my stepmother. But she brushed me off rudely. It felt really annoying. But never mind! At least I tried to respect that woman. Even though she doesn't think of me as her stepdaughter.

I really missed my mother's touch. I remember the morning I was about to leave for school. I begged my mother. Even I still remember the fragrance of my mother's skin. I didn't think that was my last touch to mom.

Now I arrived in front of the restaurant. I saw that the restaurant was still closed. I guess the restaurant was quite grand because there was one floor above it. I read the name of the restaurant with difficulty because the letters were so difficult.

"Oh! Sea village restaurant!" I said when I understood the uniquely stylized writing.

I looked for a comfortable place to sit. My nerves caught a convenience store with tables and chairs in front of it. I quickly walked to the place, which was not far from the restaurant.

I opened the shop door by pushing it. The cold air conditioner greeted me. I walked towards the food shelf. I grabbed a wafer for three thousand and a bottle of mineral water.

I immediately went to the cashier and paid. I came out and sat on a shiny aluminum chair.

"Excuse me, I have a question. What time does the kampung laut restaurant over there open?" I asked politely while pointing at the restaurant across the street.

"It's usually open at 8am." said the woman with black hair next to me.

I nodded. Eight o'clock was less than thirty minutes away. I'll just wait here. If I had a cell phone, it might be faster for me. I looked around. The asphalt road in front of me was quite busy. There were also a lot of randomly stopped vehicles carrying market vendors. There was a traditional market nearby.

When I saw the vendors transporting their wares from the transportation vehicles, I thought of my mother. I thought of my mother.

I regret that when my mother was trading at the market I didn't help her much. Even if I did help, I often swore in annoyance. Mom... I'm sorry. I feel like I've sinned a lot with mom.

I reached into the pocket of my long skirt. I held a pen and blank paper. I brought it with me on purpose. I don't have a cell phone. So I think these two things are quite important. If there's something that needs to be written down.

For some reason I feel like writing my current mood. I haven't written in a long time. Akbar is the one who made me love writing. How is Akbar doing? I'm so worried about Akbar. Last time he told me that his father was having an affair. I feel sorry for him. Now what about his mom and dad. Are they still a harmonious family? I don't know, I hope Akbar's family will be fine.

(The duration continues. While I am still looking for an angel. Mom is that angel. Where have you hidden your servant who has taken care of me. My heart limps to hug my beloved mother tightly).

I finished writing. I exhale my breath patiently. It's hard, but I'm trying to live my life.