RulerOfTheMoleRats

This breaks the canon, lol. In Spider-verse, Peter was the Lizard. Not Curt Conners. Peter was Gwen's canon event, what caused her to become Spider-Woman. It's interesting, but conflicts with your setting.

Peter has been meditating for five hours, ruminating, but we're left with pure aftershock. The pacing is like a skim stone, where we have no introspection as the plot keeps moving forwards with no real developments for the worldbuilding. Define relationships, is my first advice, since you seem to want the story to focus around that. Define how Gwen and Peter's relationship has been. Define Peter's relationship with his adoptive parents. Show what he's thinking, about his situation, about the people around him and his general environment. A suggestion might be to highlight Peters family's financial situation, since thats something pretty much anyone can understand. Mention how Peter feels about this, and you could relate this to one of your key focuses, characters. Maybe Uncle Ben makes a majority of the money, and then draw the connection that Peter's family became poor after he died in the normal story. Since New York has vigilantes, maybe try mentioning how crime has been escalating, and mention how police are responding, and since Gwen's father is a police officer, about to become a Captain (Captain Stacy), you can show his perspective too to make it more personal, and perhaps show a contrast between his and Gwen's experiences. Thus, your story gains nuance and perspective. Depth. Quality. Sorry if I'm pushing, but your story's main hook is the relationship between Gwen and the Protagonist, yes? Currently, in the story I feel like your story reads like a list of dot-points, making your hook, dare I say, straight and blunt. You have no hook, there is no build up. The answer will come, and then people will feel no excitement or reason to read what comes after. I predict that Peter will go with Gwen to the movies, ask her out, and then I'll click off your story, as well as other people reading.

My biggest complaint is that mc has not min-maxed his choices whatsoever. Given a blank check of nearly anything, he chose a fanfic variant of cultivation spider-mans powers as opposed to literally anything else that would be 100% stronger and more useful, as well as having portals/teleportation? That could've been part of the second wish! Man failed to plan.

I have no idea what this dudes saying, but damn I feel him.

First!

I feel you bro.

Honestly, I feel for Jonathan here. You've humanized the bully character too much, man. I'm kinda rooting for him now, lol.

Bro, Tanya said the thing! thats so cool

Mister Incredible, lol.

I wonder if Nth sense would be applicable to things like Haki too. Or if Carter would be able to see mana, from Black Clover. Would be rad, and feel rewarding considering the perk he got.