Chapter Twelve: Number

Days have passed since Azen and I started our fake relationship. Whenever I'd go out with my friends, he would always tag along with us that soon enough, news about us dating spread all around his school and mine.

Hindi naman na ako nagulat doon, dahil alam ko namang kilala si Azen. Even if he wouldn't tell me things about him, I'm pretty sure he's no ordinary guy. At ang mabilis na pagkalat ng balita tungkol sa amin ay patunay lang na tama ako.

Kinuha ko ang baso ko ng cocktail at uminom doon. Luminga-linga rin ako sa paligid, at pinanood ang ilang taong nagsasayaw kasabay ng malakas na tugtog ng buong Moonlight club

Bakit nga ba kami narito?

Ah. Oo nga pala. Niyaya kami ni Azen, pero hanggang ngayon ay wala pa rin siya!

"Nasaan na ba 'yang boyfriend mo, Z?" naiinip na tanong ni Lewis. "Kanina pa tayo rito pero hanggang ngayon wala pa siya."

Napa-irap ako nang wala sa oras. "Kung alam ko, e'di sana kanina pa rin tayo wala rito."

"Bakit hindi mo i-text? O tawagan?" singit ni Nikka.

"Kanina ko pa nga ginagawa, 'di ba? Ayaw naman sumagot."

"Baka nambababae na agad?" Tumawa si Lewis nang malakas.

Hindi ko alam kung biro ba 'yong sinabi niya, o hindi, pero nakaramdam ako ng onting inis dahil doon. Like that sudden irritation you get when someone pointed out that you got fat, but said it in a joking manner, so you don't know whether you'll laugh or get mad.

Gano'n. Gano'ng klase pakiramdam.

Mabilis akong tumayo sa inuupuan ko. My head is starting to ache and I think I'm getting a bit dizzy, so I wanna freshen up. And maybe get some fresh air, too. Pa na rin hindi na marinig ang mga katyaw ni Lewis. Pero pagtayo ko ay lalo lamang umikot ang paningin ko.

"Shit!" I hissed. My hands are on the table as I steady myself.

"Uy! Okay ka lang, Z?" tanong ni Lewis habang nakakapatong ang kamay sa likuran ko.

Naramdaman ko rin ang mga kamay ni Nikka sa braso ko para alalayan ako, pero mabilis akong tumango sa kanila para malaman nilang ayos pa ako.

"Saan ka ba kasi pupunta?" sinabi ni Nikka na may halong pagtataka at pag-aalala.

Inayos ko ang buhok kong nagulo bago siya hinarap. "Restroom."

"Samahan kita?"

"Hindi na. Kaya ko."

I waved my hands dismissively. I don't want to bother them just because I drank more alcohol than I could handle, so without waiting for their answer, I started walking towards the restroom.

Kaya ko pa naman. Medyo nanlalambot na ang mga tuhod ko, pero kaya ko pa. This isn't the first time that I got tipsy, anyway.

Pagkarating ko ng restroom ay may iilan nang tao sa loob. Karamihan ay kagaya kong bahagyang paliko-liko na ang lakad habang nakaakbay sa mga kaibigan nila, habang ang iba naman ay nasa salamin at nag-aayos ng mga sarili.

If I really am that drunk, I wouldn't have bothered looking around, and just slam myself at them, or push them out of my way, or even yell at them for no apparent reason. But since I didn't do any of those, and thank God, I haven't done those in the past either, I guess it's safe to say that I can still manage myself.

After I freshen up, I went out of the club, and walked towards the parking lot. For some reason, I wanted some quiet time alone. Somewhere where I can hear my thoughts, and not the trance music or crowd cheers that surrounded me.

Nananawa na rin siguro ako sa masaya at maingay na paligid ng club. Hindi na ako magtataka, dahil simula nang nawala si Dad, halos araw-araw na akong narito para lang makalimot at makapagsaya.

And that's two years already. Enough time to get tired of all of it.

"Zenna?"

I sighed, and said, "I'm fine, Nikka!" but then I realized that the voice was definitely not Nikka's.

I quickly turned to the direction of where it came from. My vision was a bit blurry, maybe because of my headache. But I still managed to recognize the person in front of me.

The last person I ever expected to see.

"Cloud?"

What the hell?

"Are you drunk? Kanina pa kita nakikitang halos muntik na laging matumba," he said, but I couldn't quite process what he was saying.

Why is he here? Sinundan niya ba ako? Kanina pa kaya siya d'yan? And why is he talking to me like we're friends?

"Why do you care?" I replied in a cold tone. "And why the heck are you here?"

Itinaas niya ang kamay niyang may hawak na sigarilyo. Matapos iyon ay sumandal siya sa isang sasakyan, na mukhang kanya, pagkatapos ay sinindihan ang sigarilyo niya at humithit mula roon.

"Alexis hates it when I smoke. Kaya lagi akong lumalabas para hindi niya maamoy."

"Why don't you ask me if I give a fuck first?"

Nag-angat siya ng paningin. "Bakit ba galit na galit ka sa 'kin?"

Hindi ko na napigilan ang pag-ikot ng mga mata ko.

Kung pwede lang sanang sabihin ko na lang basta sa kanya ang dahilan, ginawa ko na. Pero, hindi. Kaya hindi na lang ako sumagot, at nanatiling tahimik.

Siya naman ang unang bumasag ng katahimikan nang sabihin niyang, "Kamusta na nga pala kayo ni Red?"

Nilingon ko siya. Ang parehas na kilay ko ay magkasalubong na, dahil bukod sa hindi naman kami makaibigan para tanungin niya ako ng ganito, napansin ko rin ang kaunting inis sa tono niya.

"Why? Are you jealous?" I teased.

It was only meant to annoy him more; to make him see that Azen and I are still in good terms. But what I didn't expect was him, answering me like he meant every word.

"Yeah. I am."

I froze. Suddenly, my heartbeat was louder in my ear than the trance music booming from the club. It made me feel like I've immediately sobered up. And my legs that felt almost like jelly earlier? I think they'd really turn into jelly now.

Dammit.

I averted my eyes from Cloud's eyes. Kung kanina ay napakalakas ng loob kong titigan siya, ngayon ay hindi na ako makatingin sa kanya. Pakiramdam ko ay nanlalamig ako sa mga titig niya, lalo pa sa tuwing makikita ko ang pagbuga niya ng usok mula sa mga labi niya.

Mabuti na lang ay biglang tumunog ang cellphone ko, kaya nabasag ang katahimikan sa pagitan namin at nagkaroon din ako ng peedeng pagtuunan ng pansin.

Narinig ko ang malalim at malakas na buntong-hininga ni Cloud nang kunin ko ang cellphone ko sa bulsa. It was as if he wanted me to hear it on purpose. But still, I glued my eye on my cellphone screen.

Azen Redalgo calling. . .

I positioned my thumb at the green button on the screen. I badly wanted to answer Azen's call, so I'd have an excuse to get away from Cloud.

But before I could even slide my thumb on the slide, my phone disappeared from my grip.

"What the— Cloud! Ano ba!"

Lumapit ako kay Cloud nang bigla niyang kunin ang cellphone ko. Nakita kong pinatay niya ang tawag ni Azen, pero ang sumunod na ginawa niya ay hindi ko na nakita dahil tumalikod siya.

"Ano ba, akin na 'yan!" sigaw ko habang pilit siyang hinaharap sa akin.

"Give me a minute."

"Akin na sabi 'yan!"

"A minute, Zenna."

I bit my lips out of frustration. "Kapag hindi mo binigay 'yan, sisipain—"

Hindi ko na natapos ang sinasabi ko nang biglaan siyang humarap. Ang mukha niya ay ilang pulgada lang ang layo mula sa akin, kaya sandali akong napahigit ng hininga.

"I saved my number," he then said, his breath almost touching my face. "Call me. Please."

Then he handed me my phone, and started walking towards the club again. I was left there, dumbfounded. I don't even know what just happened.

Even when I got back to our booth, and even when Azen finally arrived, my mind still drifts off to that moment with Cloud.

"You okay?" Azen asked a few moments after. "Are you still mad at me?"

I shook my head. If Cloud isn't occupying my mind, I would really be mad at Azen right now.

"Nope. Just. . . Dizzy." I smiled. Then gripped my phone hard on my hand, then smiled, again.