Xiao and Lumine - Part 4: Under the night sky

Xiao was sitting at the bedside, staring out of the window. It was a quiet night, the first quiet night in ages. He looked up at the stars, blinking down at him. His body hurt, but not as if he had just finished a battle –it hurt like when you're far away from someone special. Like when you want to just hold them, but you can't. He clenched his fist and blinked away a tear. He hated how weak he felt right now.

      He had left Lumine in the desert three months ago, and every moment after had been a painful one. All he wanted was to be with her, to stay by her side, but he couldn't. She had her promises to fulfill, he had his own. When he had sworn to protect Liyue, he hadn't ever pictured himself ending up in this situation. It was a contract he couldn't break – and even if he could, he had sworn to himself that he never would. What would he be if he broke that promise now?

      He stood up with a sigh. Even if it seemed quiet tonight, he should still head out. And maybe having something to do would get his mind onto another path. He had to forget about Lumine for now. He had to put his focus back where it should be, here in Liyue. But even so, he couldn't help but long for her, yearning for the feeling of her touch again.

      When he had fallen asleep in the desert, he had felt at peace. If that was what it was like to be with her, he would never let her go. He would never leave her side. He would protect her at all costs, make sure that she saw the end of her journey. He would… No. He had his own contract with Rex Lapis to upheld. And even if Rex Lapis had taken it upon himself to end all contracts, Xiao still had the promise to himself to keep. Would he throw it away for her?

      No. Even though his heart screamed for her name, his mind was still in control. It had to be. If he let go of who he was – who he had been for thousands of years now – he wouldn't be any better than the demons he was fighting. For years he had been a weapon, and only that. And even if Lumine saw him as something else, he couldn't allow himself to think like that. Because that was all he was. A weapon to fight evil. Settling down, becoming something more, would be impossible.

      The roads were empty, the air was fresh. He headed down the road past Guili Plains towards Liyue Harbor. Even though he was far away from the sea, he could smell the fresh, salty scent of the water, giving him a false sense of freedom. He knew that he could never leave Liyue, at least not for a longer period of time. He looked up at the sky. The stars above him were still shining, blinking down at him. Maybe they were trying to tell him that everything was going to be okay. And maybe for a second he could allow himself to believe that. He took a deep breath. Peace. It was a foreign word, because even if he let himself have this moment of peace, the battle he fought would never end.

      A sound in the bushes caught his attention. He drew his weapon and clenched his fist, getting ready for the battle to come. He put on his mask and ran for the bush, dashed through the shadows. A lonely hilichurl was sitting there, drawing something in the dirt. Xiao pointed his spear at it, but the hilichurl didn't move. It didn't seem to notice him either. If the hilichurl didn't cause any trouble, maybe he should leave it alone. Xiao took a step back and waited for the hilichurl to make its move, but it just stood up and walked away. That's when he noticed the green mist coming out of the hilichurl's body, and he sighed. Even if it was peaceful, it would now cause a threat to everyone else. With a swift stroke, Xiao ended the hilichurl's life.

      His karmic debt was like a curse. No matter how careful he was, he could never prevent it's impact on others. The hilichurl was just another example of how he tainted his surroundings. If he would do this to Lumine… Then he wouldn't be able to forgive himself. He sighed and started to walk down the road to Liyue Harbor without anything else happening. A quiet night like this was rare, and he wanted to cherish it. Maybe it was another gift from the gods. And if it was, he would gladly accept it.

      As the sun started to rise, Xiao headed back towards Wangshu Inn. He stopped at the mountains south of the ruins in Guili Plains. He slid down the mountainside to a hidden cliff with view over the sea. The endless water made him wonder what it would be like to leave Liyue. Except for the one day in the desert, he hadn't left since… Since Rex Lapis had rescued him all those years ago. That was darker times. Times of war and hate. One by one the other Yakshas had perished, either killed in battle or gotten consumed by their karma. He was the only one left. The last one.

      He shook his head and sighed. He didn't want to think about his past, not on a beautiful morning like this. He sat down on the cliff and watched the sun rise, leaning back at the mountainside. The sun warmed his face, and if he concentrated hard enough, he could almost picture Lumine next to him. She was like radiating sunlight, warming him up. He closed his eyes and felt his body relax, could feel his heart beat slower. Slowly he drifted away in sleep.

      When he woke up later that day, the sun was hanging low on the sky. He had slept too long. How could he let that happen? But he had been so tired. It was as if picturing Lumine here with him had made him relax so much that he could finally feel how exhausted he actually was. He had let his guard down, something he never thought he would. Something he couldn't allow himself to do. But still… It had felt so good. So nice. So peaceful.

      But now the time for relaxing was over. Even during the day, he couldn't guarantee that the roads were safe. Threats lured everywhere, and he had to stay vigilant. Resting, sleeping out in the open, letting his guard down, were things he couldn't afford. He had work to do, a promise to keep. And until Lumine was in his arms, he intended to do his job as well as he could.

      He decided to head north of Wangshu Inn to check the roads towards Mondstadt. But he couldn't see any threats. No calls for help. When had the world become so peaceful? He closed his eyes. The afternoon sun was slowly on its way down and the rays were bathing the surroundings in a warm light. In moments like these, where he had a second of peace, he could let himself appreciate being alive.

      As the sun set, he headed back to Wangshu Inn. With how quiet it had been maybe he could afford to take the night off. Or part of it. If anything happened, he would still be able to feel it. He would still hear the cries for help. And as promised, he would come for anyone that called for aid.

      His room was still the same as he left it last night. The bed was unmade, a bloody shirt was thrown over the chair in the corner. To the right was the closet, the doors were still open. He looked out of the window on the opposite wall. It stretched across the whole wall, bathing his room a warm, golden color. The curtains were drawn to the side, giving him a full view of Liyue. He walked over to the bed and sat down. After a minute or two, he sighed and stood up again. The restlessness was unbearable. He wanted to do something. He needed to do something. Just sitting here felt so… useless.

      He started pacing back and forth when he heard a faint whisper. Xiao. He looked around. That call. So gentle, so warm. Like the sun shining down on him. But the sun was gone, and the night sky was upon him, the stars blinking down at him once again, telling him everything was going to be okay.

      Xiao. That voice again. He recognized it. But why would she call again? Was she in trouble? No. The voice was too calm, too soothing. No one in panic would call out like that. The call for him felt like a warm hug. He rushed to the door and threw it open. Lumine was standing there, ready to knock. She lowered her hand. She was here. Outside of his room. He stood there, not knowing what to say or do. He just looked at her.

      She walked closer to him and embraced him. She smelled of sweet flower and salty water. Her dress was bloody – maybe she was the one that had cleared Liyue of threats this day? But before he could ask, she whispered in his ear: "I told you I would come back." His heart was beating faster by the sound of her voice and the feeling of her touch, and he put his arms around her too. "You're here," he said. "You're finally here." She laughed, and the sound filled his body with warmth and peace. "Yes," she said, smiling at him. "I'm here."