Why love hurts..

I was searching for a new job in Delhi.I was 18 and was dating a guy but we both were not very serious, it was more like a friendship than a relationship. I joined a new company as balance transfer verification executive.And I was doing good in my job.I was getting appraised from my team leader and process head and in fact the MD of the company also recognized me as I was so good in my job.

Me and my friend Aditi was having lunch in cafeteria.Suddenly one guy came to our table.

'Hi sunny.How are you? ' aditi said.

'I am good.you tell , how are you? ' he said.

'I am good. this is my friend..Shilpa (pointing her finger towards me) ' she said.

I said hi to him and he replied too.

A young, fair, light brown eyes, pink lips, tall and handsome man..probably the most handsome man I saw till that time in my life.

' what are you eating? are you not going to ask me to have it? ' he said to me.

Ohhhhhh damn I was inside my heart.

I was having my lunch I got from home in small tiffin.And as I studied in a girls school.. I use to feel shy talking to boys.

'Ohhhhhh, I am sorry. please if you would like to share my tiffin.. ' I said.

I didn't think he will have a bite but surprisingly he took a bite. and I must not forget to share that it made me feel good that that particular charming man was sharing my tiffin (aaah! those stupid teenage feelings )

We saw each other a lot of times. we said hello,hi,by or passed smile when we hit each other every now or then. I never tried to talk to him more as I was shy,but yes, I used to stare him.

So.. one day when I was handling a customer on call for verification, he came to our process and talked to another people and went back. I thought he came to talk to me but after he went away I got little upset. I had super crush on him. I finished my call and dropped my phone and started thinking something.

'Hi'. suddenly a voice from behind my cabin approached me.

It was him. I felt super good.

'Hi Sunny'. I replied happily.

'So.. How are you? '

'Oh I am good. How are you ?'

'I am good too. I came to see you but you were busy on call. so I went back' .

'Oh yes, I was handling a verification call. it's good to see you here' .

' OK then, see you. By. '

'By. '

And he went back. I wish we could talk more. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath with happiness.

' listen ' suddenly I heard his voice again.

I turned back and he was there again.

' yes? ' I said.

' Can I have your number? '

Ohhhhhh god. I was super excited but didn't show it to him.

' Of course ' I said

' Write it down on a paper and give it to me '

I did the same.

That same evening I got a text from him and we had a long conversation for the first time.

We used to see each other in the office, we started talking everyday , and finally one day he asked me to go on a date with him. And I asked him that you know I have a boyfriend then why are you asking me to come on a date with you. He said that I don't think so you both are into your relationship. And we both like each other. You can take some time if you want. I said I will think about it.

After having a long discussion with my boyfriend we ended that relationship and after that I said yes to sunny.

On our first date he asked me to get into this relationship and I jumped in. we liked each other and we wanted to be in that relationship.

We had a lot of dates.we used to have lunch together. he used to drop me outside my society.And I had my first kiss with him.. Ohhhhhh yes.

Sunny was a decent guy. He never made me feel weird.

One day he asked me for marriage and I asked him if he was serious or not.

We were out on a date.And he said 'we are going somewhere '.

I got suspicious. 'where? '

' just sit on the bike.trust me. ' he said

I said ok. And after traveling for almost 1 hour.,we reached at the destination.

He stopped his bike and we both got down.

' we are here to meet my family ' he said.

I was surprisingly shocked.

'Why didn't you tell me before? I am not even dressed good '

I was wearing a pair of jeans and top with a handbag. but some where I felt happy deep inside my heart that he was very much serious about our relationship.

Then we went upstairs. I met his mom, masi, brother, cousins and nanaji. They all gave us their blessings and we spent 2/3 hours there ,had food and came back. I was very happy. My first relationship and till that time it made me feel so good. I was kind of proud of myself that I chose the right one. I fell deeply in love with him. I wanted to marry him really.

It was only a month and this all happened between a month. My mom went to ludhiana for the preparations of my cousin brother.

I was alone at home. And as sunny used to drop me home everyday.,he came that day too. we had food outside but I wanted to spend some more time with him. so I asked him if he would like to come over to my place. ( I want to say here that when a guy invites his girlfriend to his place.. if people think that is OK., they must think the same for the girl who does it. )

So he came and I showed him some albums I had.we were sitting very close to each other. and there were no more photos left in the album for him to see.( it's the fault of album)

He started kissing me and I didn't refuse. Ohhhhhh. I can't write in details. So I don't know about him but I lost my virginity that night.

And he stayed next day too.

I was very sure about our relationship and marriage as he took me to meet his family twice.

After few days I went to my cousin's marriage and after that me and mom came back together.

Somehow my mom got to know that someone came into my house. And after all the arguments I agreed and I told everything about sunny.

My mom was hurt so she called my masi and her son and my mama and told them about what I did.

They asked me if sunny was serious about marriage. I told them that yes he is. I told sunny about everything that happened in my house. He said he is there whenever I need him.

But here is the truth, when my family talked to him and his family. They refused to come over and talk. Even sunny denied to come over.

I didn't understand what the hell happened all of a sudden. He and his family was ok with our relationship then why the hell they didn't come.

Few days later, my masi took me to her home and I stayed there for 2 months almost.

After some months somehow I managed to talk to him. And I told him that I am angry on you, I wanted to take revenge somehow but I couldn't bcoz I loved you.

I asked him why didn't you come. I thought he will tell me something like my family didn't want us to meet but what he replied was like a death sentence. I still remember those words. 'You were a tissue paper.. I used you and threw you out of my life ' .I don't know what did he get after doing this or after having sex with me....2 minutes of satisfaction.What did his mother would have taught him even after being a female.. to use other girls in the name of marriage and have sex and then leave.

Even after one year or something like that I chatted with him from a fake account and I asked him about his past relationships. He mentioned me. but what he told me that he made me understand that family is the most important thing and he let me go.

Wow.

I cursed myself for so many years that I chose him. but now I know I was not guilty bcoz I loved him. He was wrong. He did wrong to me. He cheated me. His family and his sanskars were not good. It's really easy to blame a girl for letting boys take advantage of them.., but why people don't put question mark on boy's character for cheating us.

I really wanted to know why he did it to me. but after so many years of self realization I forgot what he did but didn't forgive.

And I want everyone to know the funny part. One year back I got a message from him ' I know I don't have the right to know it but still wanna ask you if you got married or not '.

I wanted to use so many slangs on him.but I know he is not worth my answer in any way..not in slangs even.

I still don't understand why he did it but I don't want to know now. I guess it's his character which he got in will from his family.

I still don't know why Love hurts?