20.

I didn't like that he was so experienced, that so many other girls had him before I did. At first it just made me feel like another target on a never ending list, but then I picked up on the small things - like how his voice would soften when he spoke to me, how he so badly tried to keep his rude remarks at bay, and not upset me. He was changing.

For me.

"Do you think you were ready to go all the way tonight?" Lilian asks me, and I can't help but blush at just how confident I had felt in that moment, but now thinking back, I most definitely was just putting on an act. I didn't feel confident in myself at all.

"No, I don't think all the way. We've never done anything, like not even kissed with tongue," I cringe at my sudden disclosing of this information to Lil, but I trusted her, I really did, and I desperately needed some advice on what to do next.