Time skip but not a time skip?

~~~~~~~~Rogue Narrator's POV~~~~~~~~

"Hello everyone and welcome back. As you can tell I am not one to give up easily, in fact this is his house. I plan on entering it and seeing what it is that he does in it so watch as we see the Lifestyle of Joseph."

(A/N: I will describe the events the camera follows in third person.)

The camera follows him around as he uses lockpicks on the lock of a wooden front door, then after a few minutes, and some grumbling from the perpetrator, the door opened and he walked inside.

"Ah ha, we're in! Now let's see. This seems to be a living room... and there's nothing here? What? Let's see over here, nothing in the kitchen either?"

The perpetrator runs around frantically looking for any signs of life but can't find anything in the house, not even Joseph.

"But I saw him go in here, I even checked all the rooms and looked into every nook and cranny, but nothing."

The invader sighs before pointing the camera at the ground, "Fine. He wins this round, I'll get him next time though. See you next time viewers, this is me signing off."

The camera goes black and the feed ends.

~~~~~~ Joseph's POV~~~~~~~

I don't know why but I feel upset. I've been in here for almost the whole 7 years now and apparently when I'm in here I don't need to eat, sleep, or go to the bathroom. Pretty amazing I have to say.

Hm, you're wondering what I've been doing. Hehe, take a look at my status screen and you'll see.

[

Joseph Walner

LV: 0/???

XP: 0/100

Str: 11

Cha: 15

int: 10

Lck: 7

Dex: 9

Chakra{

Chakra: 753,002,230

Chakra Regen: 3000 per minute

Chakra Density: 2.5 (A/N: So my math was apparently not working that day. Each point one doubles chakra meaning 1.0 - 2.0 equals 10 times 2 which is 20, then the point 3 gets added in which makes it 26. Well now it is 30x more potent and I know this math is right now)

Chakra Impurity: 89%

}

SP(System Points): 10

Skills:

Stolen:

Master Hand Signs ... Master Chakra Control ... Master Self Regeneration ... Expert Sealing Techniques ... Wood Release

Earned: None

Bought:

Expert Analysis ...

Innate:

Skill stealing ... Personal Dimension ...

Learned:

Jutsu (Various) (A/N: There are just way too many Jutsu for me to think about him actually having so I don't want to name them all off, it'll be a pain) ...

]

Haha, cool right? I figured out that since I don't need sleep I can just keep making more and more shadow clones and have them train in various things while I train and keep compressing my Chakra more while I keep training it.

Efficient right? I just wish I had enough points to start making my memory better, I forgot quite a few of the Jutsu I had learned, but I mean I guess that's what happens when you do nothing with them for 7 years.

I did get good with the ones I have and I now can make my Jutsu much more weak now, so pros! Some cons though, I don't have a razor with me so my beard is ridiculously itchy right now. There have been a few moments where it was so bad that I just kinda stopped what I was doing and scratched Vigorously.

Oh yeah, and if you noticed I got my analysis up to expert! It took me having a shadow clone go around using it on himself and everyone else constantly this whole time to get it up that high. What I should do is just make a small shadow clone army go out into the woods and analyze everything, that way I can actually level this skill up more since there is next to nothing in this dimension.

'Host it has now been 7 years inside this dimension and 1 day has passed outside.'

Ah thank you system. I plan on getting some good food, a good shave, and a good bath!

I open up the portal and look around the house, man it looks just like I left it, except shorter.

Hm, I think I'm taller than I was before I was sent to other worlds. I mean naturally I'm thinner, I haven't eaten anything for 7 years. That's what happens to a person.

I walk out the door and lock it before turning around and landing on my ass after bumping into someone. "Hey what are you doing in Joseph's house, do I need to kick your ass?" I look up and see it's Jiraiya.

I chuckle before I respond to him, "It is me, Joe that is." I give him a cheeky grin as he looks at me.

"Bullshit, you didn't have a full on beard yesterday, you look 30 at least." I chuckle some more.

"Told you the beard makes me look old. Plus what was a day for you was 7 years for me, I used a technique to get myself back to at least being close to my actual age but younger since I mean I may as well enjoy youth." He pinches the crown of his nose and rubs it.

"Okay tell me something only Joe would know." I look at him with a grin.

"Past, present, or future?"

"Past." Wow he was fast to decide that.

"Okay, then I know that you've had a thing for Tsunade since you first met her and that only grew once she stopped being-" He covered my mouth and looked at me with fear in his eyes.

"Stop! You never know where she might be, god dammit stop. I believe you." He sighs once I put my hands up, indicating my surrender.

After he removes his hand from my mouth I stand up and smile, "Bringing up some memories?"

He sighs and nods, but doesn't respond as he rubs his face so I go and ask him a question, "Think you can show me a barber? I want to get a trim." I point at my overly large beard.

He nods before finally jumping back into his smile, "Well now that you're in your 20's... again I guess? We can go and have some fun hehe. Wanna go with me to the bath house? Well after we get that fuzzy monster of yours shaved that is."

Well I do need a bath so I told him I'll take him up on his offer, he gets so giddy that he starts using his body flicker so I make a shadow clone go follow him while I wait for a moment. Then, after waiting for a time I teleport to the clone taking its place. "So this is the barber?"

Jiraiya looks at me for a second before laughing, "Man I never knew that technique could be so useful. I'm going to have to go and learn it if I can be that lazy with it. Oh uh yeah, this is the barber. She's really fast so we'll set off rather fast after." He then walks in with me following him, I walk up to the counter and he sits at a chair over at the side.

"Hello and welcome to Layirn Hair, are both of you gentlemen going to get your haircut or just you?" The small woman asked me.

I look to Jiraiya who then shakes his head so I reply to the lady, "Just me please." I give here a gentle smile that probably is buried underneath beard.

She motions for me to follow her and I sit in the chair that she walked behind, "So tell me how do you want it?" I start describing to her how it is that I want my haircut, then I describe how it is I want my beard trimmed. She looked at me in confusion before she got excited since she hadn't really seen this style before.

After 15 minutes she told me she was done so I made a shadow clone and looked around at it before nodding happily. "Thank you for the service. Also do you mind if I have someone draw your look later? I feel it'll be a great seller." I shrug and tell her to go ahead, it's not even something I invented so I don't care.

"Thank you so much! As thanks you can have this haircut free." Well I appreciate it but she did a good job so I leave her 50 Ryo as a tip before I leave with Jiraiya.

He looks at me before nodding, "I see why you missed it now. That, what did you call it? Baby face right? Yeah, it was bad now that I remember it. This suits you much more than that. Now lets go!"

Wow he looks strangely excited, "Mind if we stop by a furniture store first too? Please? My house is so empty." He looks at me and sighs.

"10 minutes tops. Got it, I want to get there asap, I need a friend there!" He chuckles a bit at the end.

He leads me to a furniture shop not far away and I basically just get a bunch of top end stuff like a soft bed, soft couch, soft etc etc. Basically shit that didn't have straw in it. I will have to show these guys cotton one day wont I?

After putting in the order and paying about 5,000 Ryo Jiraiya dragged me to the bath house with a quickness I don't think I'd see anywhere but a man running for his life.

Once we got there I figured out why it is that he brought me here, some of the cutest girls were getting off their shift in an hour. Cutest girls in a bath house you might be wondering, are they the girls that service you?

Nope. They just hang out with you while you bathe. That's it, bit disappointing but Jiraiya has fun. Since he's broke I ended up paying for him and almost immediately after he did 2 of the girls that apparently liked him dragged him off to go bathe. I sighed and decided to take the option where I would actually bathe by myself. I figured that it would be nice to just relax in a warm bath alone.

I walked to the large bath which was outdoors and heard Jiraiya laughing with two girls giggling on the other side of one of the walls. Must be the mixed bath. I took off my dirty clothes and out them into my inventory, those will need a heavy cleaning since I've worn it for so long now. After I put my clothes away I slowly lowered myself into the bath and let out a deep sigh as I continued lowering myself.

God I haven't had a bath in so long, even before I came to this world I didn't really take baths, I mostly just took showers. So this bath was a god send for me.

After relaxing for so long I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew I felt a tapping on my shoulder and when I opened my eyes it was Jiraiya grinning. Seems he enjoyed himself, well I did too. I forgot how great baths can be for helping someone relax.

I stand up and dry myself off with one of the towels off to the side before I grab some of my clean clothes I prepared beforehand. "So any other plans for today Jiraiya?"

He contemplates for a moment before grinning, "Well we could always go show everyone how much you've changed. I can't wait to see how they react hehe." There's that mischievous​ attitude I miss of Jiraiya's.

He sent off a letter with one of those infamous quill and papers that the Hokage used then we start walking to the Hokage's office while smiling. I follow him while also smiling, I can't wait to see Tsunade's face.

After about ten minutes we arrive at the Hokage's office and we put our best poker faces on. Before I can start entering though he shakes his head and tells me to enter in 2 minutes since he has to sell his act to make it that much better.

I sit outside the doors while he enters so I close my eyes and try listening. I find myself unable to, probably due to some seals or what not that are in the Hokage's office. I try thinking about what they could be with my stolen skill but I guess I'm not good enough with it yet or it isn't good enough yet.

After 2 minutes I stand up and get ready to open the door, but right before I can the door is sent flying with me being taken with it. I feel dazed for a moment but it seems my regeneration took quick care of it so I push the doors off of me and stand up. In the doors wreckage I see Jiraiya knocked unconscious and Tsunade walking back towards the Hokage.

I walk into the room and look curiously at the Hokage and Tsunade before I sit down in a chair by Tsunade. The Hokage looks at me before sighing, "Jiraiya made us quite angry at you when he said you disappeared, then he started laughing when you opened the door which made Tsunade think he was pranking her. This led to that and yeah. God I can't keep up with being Hokage" He starts rubbing his temples as he worries about the future.

I rub the back of my head, "Sorry I didn't know what he had planned and thought it'd be funny if you guys couldn't recognize me." He sighed again before leaning back in his chair.

I looked to the chair to the left of me and noticed just how short Tsunade actually is, she's only a bit above 5 foot meanwhile I'm now a bit over 6 foot. She mush have noticed that I was looking at her, but I think she thought I was staring at her lewdly but I just smiled innocently which makes her put her fist down.

After a few relaxing moments the Hokage finally speaks, "So Tsunade has had very good luck controlling her power so we plan on going and releasing it to all leaf Shinobi. Jiraiya hasn't had as much luck but he has managed somehow, and well I've had amazing results. I can make my power as strong as it used to be by making my chakra output miniscule or I can make it stronger buy putting forth more into a Jutsu."

No clue why he's telling me this but okay then. He must have noticed because he sighs and looks at me, "I am telling you this because you don't realize how powerful this is that you gave to the leaf. It will give us a step up on issues. Also I was going to call you here because I need you to go and convert Orochimaru soon if you can since I have a time crunch. I was also told you did something to Danzo, well I need you to finish him off. I don't like ordering this but if what you say is right, well, he will make a deal with others outside of the leaf to take control of the leaf which I cannot have. So please. I request your help with this please."

Well I do want to steal the rest of Danzo's skills, and I want to figure out how to get Orochimaru to convert since those rewards are pretty sweet. "Sure I'll take care of them." I mean I already had missions for them so may as well get other rewards along with it heh.

I look at tsunade and smile a bit, "Wanna have a bet?"