I: A new beginning

Stories usually have happy endings where everyone lives with their loved ones happily ever after or gains some cool power after climbing to the top, I never once thought that it could be me. I was lost. I was broken. I wasn't enough for this world. No one looked at me when I passed by with a gloomy expression or cheered me up even as just fake kindness or pity. There wasn't such a thing in my life.

I was meant to break myself apart for others but not for myself. I couldn't want something because that meant I was greedy and mannerless. I could never talk about how I felt since there was no one to trust. The world is dark and cruel, even when it's bright.

"Qingyan...what a stupid name..." I was always set apart from the rest, because I was different. I sat atop the school building gazing at the sun that shone brightly that day. I remember it so vividly it's like I lived it yesterday. I watched two figures at a distance fight, a thin figure trying their hardest to not fight back and the thicker figure not holding back a punch.

That must be what it's like for them. Must be exciting being different. Always on the run, even if no one loves you, it's better to be hated. That's what I think. At least they'll feel something strong towards you, right?

I sighed letting all those unsaid words fly away in the windy breeze, it was soothing. I had hoped that maybe it would be nice to at least have had a friend. No one saw me come up the rooftop, they were too busy losing themselves in shame and fear. For being useless and not being brave enough to confront all these fears of theirs.

Baggy eyes, raggedy dark clothes, ripped up jeans, loose round reading glasses and dirty white shoes with a flung over backpack, my face covered in acne all around. That was me, Yi Qingyan.

"F*ck you world." I sighed and a smile was plastered all over my silly face, bright and clear, I threw myself as if I were a bird finally taking flight. My body pounded harshly against the wind as I closed my eyes and let the feeling sink in.

The wind rattled my bones like they were drums, the clothes stuck to my clothes like it was holding onto dear life. I could only see light in the darkness. It felt warm and comforting.

Am I dead yet? I thought it'd be more painful… I thought death was meant to show your life pass by, I thought death meant excruciating pain and then peace, but there was none.

I blinked my eyes open several times, a beautiful figure faded into my view.

A tear fell on my face, I opened my eyes to see it was a girl. Her mask covered half of her face and I could see a worried expression. I could see the mixed feelings in her face, there was hatred, anger and above all, worry.

"Wh...why are you crying..?" i managed to mumble, but she only breathed in and out and smiled, her emotions faded in an instant. I could see a purple light around us like a shield, she stood up and clenched her fists, the last thing I saw was her cursing how horrible the world was.

"What an f-ed up world this is...hah...to the point that someone has to go this far..." I couldn't see her expression but I could see her bleeding hands and I could feel the agony in her heart, then I blacked out. Who knows for how long.

"...gencies!...tay calm..!...aid call 911 roxie..!" there were voices, I could hear the urgency in their voices, I could care less in the moment. I just wanted to know who she was. 

They took me into the emergency room and I could smell the antiseptics and could feel the needles poking my skin gently, I could smell the latex on the gloves they wore, it was almost nostalgic.

"I..."

"Doctor! He woke up!"

"Check his vitals make sure he's stabilized."

The nurse nodded and held onto her clipboard tightly in anxiety, almost as if she was waiting for some big reveal.

"Alright, get him situated. I want no leaks on this information, do you understand, Rose?" the doctor's gentle voice faded into a stern, deep one as he went on. He lifted his glasses and stared at the nervous female who simply nodded and ran out.

"Kay' kiddo, you can get up now." I flinched at his words and managed to at the very least sit up. There were syringes inside my body and a pink shirt on me that smelled like antiseptics. I just turned to look at him for a second and sighed, He's probably gonna start lecturing me about how I should have never gone out of the building.

"You do know that what you did was dangerous right?" The man leaned in as I nodded, I just wanted to know who the girl beneath the mask was. I was wasting time here. "If you knew, then why did you do it?"

"Cause I felt like it." I looked around anxiously hoping to see the girl in the bed next to me but it was all empty.

"I doubt anyone tries to commit suicide cause they felt like it." The man lifted his glasses again and sighed, "Alright then, I'm not a therapist anyway why bother." There was an awkward silence for a while, the doctor got up and snatched my hand rapidly.

"Hey!"

"Oh? So you're not mute huh?"

"Of course not..!"

"Well then, I'm sure you've heard of people with artes?" he asked, his gaze was not even on me, he seemed to be focused on pinching my skin. "yes."

"kay, cause I don't feel like doing a lecture for idiots on artes 101." He scoffed, I finally got a good glimpse of his face, he had a tired expression, his face was chiseled like those lifeless statues you see at museums or gardens. He had long eyelashes and a button nose, his hair was disheveled and looked as if he just got up from a short nap. His small eyes turned to me and he snorted.

"So, are you gonna listen to me or not?"

"uh sure..." I replied, maybe he'd tell me about the girl who saved me from the fall. I need to find her. I need answers. Why did she save me? Why was she crying? Was it because of me? Or is she hurt? Why was she fighting with that heroine from earlier? it makes me question if the heroes are actually what they say they are.

"kay' kiddo, you've got artes. We found traces of some strange dust in your blood, since it was quite a unique case we didn't ask the people from the laboratory to test it but instead asked some secret agents to put it in a tube of water to see if it still glowed or not."

"it's like saying if a diamond will still sparkle in water." i rolled my eyes as I started to rip the syringes off my arms and sat up on the side of the bed. I could feel that man's stare on me.

"What now?"

"well, i guess you are an idiot."

"Kay, thanks for the compliment doc, but I've gotta get moving. I don't need my parents to put me in a box and ship me back to-"

"back to where? China?"

"exactly." I pointed out, he let out a dry laugh and his expression stiffened again, "You do know that it's illegal to ship a person to another country right? It's to stop immigration anyway." He shrugged, "My point is, your parents can't ship you back to china, but I'm sure you already know that."

"I didn't." I lied, I was still slipping my red and white nike shoes on and tying my shoelaces when I felt my body stiffen.

"I swear...I hate kids. I don't know why veronica still wants one when they're so annoying." He sighed, my body froze in place, it wouldn't listen. I clenched my teeth tightly and it just fueled my anger.

"Look kid, learn to listen to someone when they're talking. Geez. Anyway, You have an Artes and we don't know which it is, so be careful when you talk, or touch people. Don't be impulsive or you might accidentally kill someone." He cracked his neck a bit and placed his hand over it, he finally raised his eyebrows in exhaustion and let me go. The dark glow around my body disappeared almost instantly.

"Who are you again?" I asked, he stopped midway to the door and contemplated for a bit, "I'm...Yves. Doctor Yves Yu." He walked off without even looking back, I regretted this day the most.

"wait...he didn't even tell me where I'm at?!" I gaped "and how am I supposed to look for her?!"

I pondered for a bit as I walked back and forth, I could check the news! My suicide attempt surely caught the attention of the media, including the fight between the girl and whatshername. I scurried over to the door and found an elevator, I headed down to the first floor and ran to the waiting area. There she was. Her fight. The same black mask with white outlines, the one shaped like a fox with two white circles as its eyes, no mouth, no nose, it was just plain and cheap. 

She had cascading shoulder length black hair and a slender figure, with a black strap shirt and a white long sleeve shirt that hung around her shoulders, with nice black jeans. 

"oh my goodness! Poor Lynx! She was fighting with a vicious villain!"

"Puh-lease! Imogen isn't half as strong as Lynx, Her artes is Chimera!"

"Right! All she needs to do is take the ability of any animal and she becomes invinvible!"

"Yeah. Too bad a boy tried to commit suicide to distract the villain, what an angel!"

"I hope he's alright."

"I heard he's recovering at the hospital..."

"Poor boy."

I could overhear their conversations and the very thought of doing that as a distraction was offensive. I couldn't bare to hear what they were saying, but at the very least now I knew the girl's name.

"Imogen...I'll remember it."I felt my face flush a bit and placed my hand on my chest, I couldn't quite describe the feeling. It was a mix of joy, fear and I think love. "I hope the day we meet you'll let me look your way, and deem me worthy of your gaze." I mumbled, a smile was plastered all over my face. Until two large shadows loomed over me, once I turned around I cowered in fear once again.

"Qingyan..."