CHAPTER EIGHT

MOTHER-SON BONDING 

(unbearable in-laws) 

The husband may be forced to bend the kneel to listen to his mother. 

A well properly raised mommy's boy could remain under the control or influence of his mother for a very long time, even in marriage. 

I have a friend who once said her fiance is shy to introduce her to the mother, matter of fact he only did so when there was a family union and he still didn't introduce her in his mom's presence until she asked her directly who she was and why she was here. 

  "He didn't even introduce me to his mom, he left us and went to the parlor, his mom was staring at me with this awkward silence after which she asked, who are you?".

This encounter could be embarrassing, but excuse the mom for asking because she is always in control of her son's life so she decides who the son dates or gets married to.

At times the family decides who the man should get married to. This trend is mostly pitched by the mother, not the father who is the head of the house. 

 Mother's thoughts go thus; 

" I should be the one to choose a woman as good as myself for my boy".

She expects to play a key role in choosing a suitable bride good enough for her son. She tries to find out for herself how good her rival is when her son brings home a stranger he claims he loves and he is well accustomed to. 

Can she cook? 

Can she clean?

Is she down to earth? 

What does she do for a living?

Are you sure you have made the right choice? 

  Is she from a rich and well-to-do family? 

If he answers all the questions without any fault, and the bride is very beautiful, has a great shape and appears humble and she's super friendly with his mother, it's a white flag.

When the son tries to make excuses for the woman he is about to introduce to his mother it's a red flag. 

She would conclude and pull him aside " I don't like her, I want you to end this right now". 

         "Well, I love her",

   My son, "Love is not enough".

If he doesn't and ends up marrying her that is where the trouble begins a strained relationship between the two families of the spouse ensues.