She just wants to disappear...

"We need to get close to justin, steve and william." zayne said. "For all we know, william might be the one behind this."

"By close you mean?" rose asked.

But zayne said " First things first, we need to find out where they are living."

"Easy enough" helen said. He raised a brow.

"We know where the main branch of triumvirate is, that is where justin's and william's office will be. We also know where heron entertainment is, and that is where steve's office is going to be. At some point they'll have to go home right?" helen said. Zayne tilted is head back and sighed.

"Gods, I hate waiting." he said. helen hated it too, but she was used to it, since a big part of spying is waiting.

Zayne watched them all, a contemplative look in his eyes. Then he turned to cassian

" We need cars, rent them for 6 months, don't buy them."

"I'll go with him" az and sam said at the same time. Zayne shrugged.

"I was going to send you along anyway."

"I want to go too." rose said. He sighed

"Alright."

"And after that?" helen asked. He cocked his head and stared at her.

"After that you, me, sam , and celeana, we shall go to triumvirate, and cristina , and anyone who's interested among you three can go to heron. once there, we leave sam and cristina there to try and hack in to the company. once justin, william and steve are out, we follow them home."

" With sam and cristina out of the picture, that leaves me, helen and celeana with justin and william." he paused and looked at celeana " I want celeana to follow william, and helen might have been enough to follow justin and find out where he lives, but " he paused again and said he looked at helen " I want her to try and get inside his house today."

They sat up straight.

"Today?" cassian asked. " Maybe we should wait an--"

"We have to do it one day anyway" zayne said, his eyes still on helen. "You up for it?"

Helen shrugged. "Sounds fun." she cocked her head. "And why do you need to come along with me?"

"In case something goes wrong"

"Are you sure it's not because you want to make sure I'm not being reckless ?"

"If you want to keep on questioning my intentions, I can tell you now that this mission isn't going to work out."

She rolled her eyes. "Fine"

He smirked and turned to face them.

"So who's going with cristina,?"

"I'll go" az said. Zayne suspected as much, from the barely suppressed smiles on his friend's faces, he could tell, they knew it too.

"Fine." he said. "Now go and get the cars." they stood up and walked over to the door, rose stopping near celeana to whisper something in her ear, to which celeana gave a nod, her gaze distracted, then rose walked out too. Celeana has been distracted for some time. Maybe because of her headache, zayne thought. He turned to find helen staring at him. With that contemplative look of hers. She looked away. He had the urge to grab her chin and make her look at him.

"So we're done here?" cristina asked. He gave her a nod. she stood up at the same time helen did. Both looked at each other. Just as helen looked away, cristina's eyes softened. She took helen's hand, helen looked up startled.

"Come on, show me the manor." she said, taking helen along with her. Soon only celeana and zayne were left in the room.

"Is something bothering you celeana?" he asked carefully. She looked at him slowly. She stared at him for a long time and finally said

"Head ache" he leaned forward.

"Is it bad? Maybe you should get it checked."

"I will." she sighed and stood. "I'm going to sleep for some time, wake me up when they return."

"Sure."

Maybe he should get some sleep too. If he's going to be with helen, with no one around to make peace between them, he had a feeling he's going to need the rest.

* * * * *

"Are you still mad at me?" helen asked. Cristina looked over at her. Seeing her standing in the middle of the garden, helen had to admit cristina looked at home. Her face is as vibrant as the flowers around her. She walked over to the sitting area.

"You know I can't stay mad at you for long" she said, sitting down and leaning her head back on the chair. Helen's lips curved up a little. She'd prefer to sit somewhere else instead of the garden, but she didn't voice it aloud. Instead she walked over and sat opposite cristina, trying not to think about the last time she sat here with her parents.

"So you were mad at me." cristina stared at her for a moment before nodding.

"I was." helen pursued her lips. What did she expect? She deserved it of course, her anger, her disgust. Still it felt hard to push past the lump in her throat and speak.

"Why?"

"Do you have to ask? " cristina said, annoyed. "I told you a million times that coming here is a bad idea. No matter how careful you are, something like this is bound to happen."

Helen blinked. "So you aren't angry at me for how I behaved with the girl yesterday?"

"Of course not" cristina said, her voice tight. " I'm not saying that what you did was right, but that man brings out the worst in you. So, I understand why you behaved the way you did."

Helen leaned back, her head resting in the chair. Her lips curved in up in a bitter smile.

"He said he was visiting" Her voice is bitter too.

"Put him out of your mind, helen"

She couldn't. "Back home, he never even looked at me properly" her eyes burned and she shut them tightly. "Even now, he's visiting me in secret. Like I'm some disgusting thing. Like he doesn't want the world to think he's involved with me."

"Helen" cristina said, straining. "Stop talking like that. Th--"

"I just--I just wish they would leave me alone." she opened her eyes to find cristina staring at her, her eyes sad and helpless.

"Who are they?" she asked bitterly.

Helen knew it wasn't fair. Cristina had done nothing but care for her in all these years. But still helen couldn't stop herself from saying

"Everyone"

Her eyes shuttered, hurt evident on her face. But helen said nothing to soothe her, to assure her that when she said everyone, it doesn't include cristina. Because deep down she knew, she just wants to disappear and go far, far away from everyone who knew her as song lin. She wished she could erase their memories of her. She was tired, so so tired.

"I'm not leaving you alone." cristina said, her eyes hard. " Not now, not ever."

Helen forced a smile. It's just a matter of time before cristina's patience ran out and helen is a master at testing other's patience.

"I don't like that look" cristina said crossly.

"What look?"

"The 'let's see' kind of look."

Shaking her head, helen asked "Do you like the manor?"

She looked around, a smile lighting her face. "I have to say it's beautiful. The garden too, it's amazing."

Helen nodded. "My mom used to love sitting here and read. I used to play here for most part of the evening. " It felt like that's another life time ago.

"Do you miss it?" cristina asked, startling her.

"Miss what?"

"This manor, the garden, your childhood. Do you miss them?"

"No" she lied. "No I don't"